Ghosts of Incompetence Past

[Spyderbabe]

mack I hate to burst your bubble but this isnt incompetence, its practically good.... come on man dig deeper in the closet. I know you have worse stuff in there!

[LynnDigby]

Originally Posted by mackb

Ya gotta love the post-apocolyptic sky and goofy man entering the pic. Simply put, I can't make a person look real when I paint in oil with a knife.

mackb, in some hands, the painting knife is truly a lethal weapon.

[mackb]

Thanks Spyder, I think...and Lynn, I just don't know what to say...you're killin me...

Well, I dug deeper, inot my mining pics, and you'll see what trouble I have painting things from head with no reference photos....which is why I have gone over to using photos a lot more now.

enjoy

[tgsloth]

Gosh, Kathleen, you're in a charitable mood. I think Mack's landscape is the full equal of my, now famous, Pepto Bismal Cliffs.

[Diane Cutter]

Originally Posted by tgsloth

Gosh, Kathleen, you're in a charitable mood. I think Mack's landscape is the full equal of my, now famous, Pepto Bismal Cliffs.

... Or my 'Lady of the Poo'... We must have been inspired about the same time of our (arrested) development!

Diane

[Spyderbabe]

Originally Posted by tgsloth

Gosh, Kathleen, you're in a charitable mood. I think Mack's landscape is the full equal of my, now famous, Pepto Bismal Cliffs.

OH, I think your cliffs remain in a class by themselves!

Mack's painting had some nice things happening in different places. He could cut it up and have some small paintintgs that dont suck too bad.

[Spyderbabe]

Originally Posted by mackb

Well, I dug deeper, inot my mining pics, and you'll see what trouble I have painting things from head with no reference photos....which is why I have gone over to using photos a lot more now.

enjoy

Mack, at what point did they realize that the Baby Jesus was stolen from the manger?
Were you called in to document the crime scene with a plein air creche avec Stollen bébé !?

[oldradagast]

Originally Posted by mackb

Ok, you asked for it....





Ya gotta love the post-apocolyptic sky and goofy man entering the pic. Simply put, I can't make a person look real when I paint in oil with a knife.

Posts like this reassure me that when the world ends, many of us will be well-trained in how to paint it! It takes talent to paint ghastly ash clouds in a sickly sky, rocks that have been blasted almost to pieces by the bombs, and rows of spears in the distance, which I assume are set there to break up any charges by the horse-riding nomads that rule this doomed land.

What I really like about this painting is all the attention to detail in various nightmarish ways: at some point, our poor artist probably should have noticed that this painting was a truly disturbing disaster (or, if it was accurate, he or she should probably not be outside without a full suit of battle armor), yet he or she painted away without hesitation, determined to complete this ghastly thing to someday share with all of us on this thread. For that, I thank you! I assume that the goofy, huge human-like figure (probably enlarged to giant size from the radiation in this post apocolyptic landscape) is the artist, running in terror from this creation.

Well done!

[oldradagast]

Originally Posted by mackb

Thanks Spyder, I think...and Lynn, I just don't know what to say...you're killin me...

Well, I dug deeper, inot my mining pics, and you'll see what trouble I have painting things from head with no reference photos....which is why I have gone over to using photos a lot more now.

enjoy

Paintings like this trouble me. I really want to know where some of you folks live so I can make sure never, EVER to get too close to those areas!

If this painting is accurate, what we have is probably the first know "plein air" artistic rending of a black hole or some other horrid, nameless Abyss that is sweeping everything away into it. Notice how the curve of space and time are warped beyond recognition near the event horizon of this Abyss; once straight wooden beams bend and overlap in odd ways, and it wouldn't surprise me if those other strange blobs of color were supposedly "people" after spending too much time near this gaping hole in space.

I strongly recommend that folks go back to painting normal landscapes: things like this can be hazardous to your health. I should know, having apparently traveled to other worlds to paint some of my Doomsday Landscapes!

[andres123]

double post

[andres123]

Well, much like another poster I am "afeared" of posting what are my best and having rank with the many jewels featured in this thread.
The lady with the pearl earrings looks like she was hit in face by a shovel. A true visual assault.
The "purple monster" was... interesting. I particularly like that the purple water had spray coming from everywhere.
Of course, who can forget cat with the detached jaw.
I would also offer commentary on the orange thing in post #612, if I had some idea of what it was.
But the winner for me was in post 431.

Is a tidal wave attacking the picturesque village? Is the village built on a wall of water? Looking at the mixed perspectives in this picture made my brain stop. To me it the balance of bad and good that makes this the winner for me.

I will post my own master pieces later.

Andres123

[tgsloth]

And now for the first 3rd party entry in the bad art thread. I purloined this from Lynn Digby, a distinguished member of the forum and sharp critic. It is a De Kooning hanging in MOMA's permanent collection (permanent because maybe no one would take it away).
For all of us who proudly submitted our worst, we can at least say we're better than De Kooning.

[mackb]

Originally Posted by Spyderbabe

Mack's painting had some nice things happening in different places. He could cut it up and have some small paintintgs that dont suck too bad.

good idea Spyder, In fact I have done just that with a few of my paintigns on masonite in the past, but this one was beyond surgery.

Oldradagast, the horrible rail car was in a mine, deep underground. Even I know I need a lot more practice ....many, many years of practise...But you made me laugh out loud on your comments about my man building an Inukshuk (stone statue guide) against a horrible sky.

Tgsloth, ya gotta be kidding, no way there is an equal to pepto abismal cliffs....

[oldradagast]

tgsloth: On that "painting" by De Kooning... see, things like that really do anger me. I am sorry, but that is not art. It isn't anything - I could photograph the surface of my palatte after painting a real piece of art and get the same result. There is absolutely no skill (IMHO) involved in such a piece of "art." When there is no longer any attempt to portray ANYTHING recognizable, how is it art? And yet I bet things like this would sell for millions...

Andres123: Yes, there is something creepy and wrong about that fishing village. It clearly follows non-Euclidean geometry... or, maybe the black hole illustrated in a previous post lies underneath this little town, thus explaining the horrid warping of space!

[Colorix]

Originally Posted by oldradagast

tgsloth: On that "painting" by De Kooning... see, things like that really do anger me. I am sorry, but that is not art. It isn't anything - I could photograph the surface of my palatte after painting a real piece of art and get the same result. There is absolutely no skill (IMHO) involved in such a piece of "art." When there is no longer any attempt to portray ANYTHING recognizable, how is it art? And yet I bet things like this would sell for millions...

Are we allowed to be serious? Thought not, but I'll follow the example of the giants that have gone before me...

De Kooning is probably rolling with laughter on his millions, because he's tapped into the "trend" of willing suckers being willingly fooled into willingly believing that wiping off paint on canvas instead of a rag is art, and willingly paying millions for hoaxes.

Now, *that* scam is a work of art!

Charlie