Leaf and Two Acorns (X-Post from Critique Forum)

[Herb]

Hi, All.

I haven't been around much again...spending my time practicing drawing. Here's my latest if anyone is interested. It's Neopastel and Sennelier on 11" x 14" cold pressed watercolor paper primed with Colourfix.

I'd like a thorough critique if you have time. I am having a devil of a time submitting to the Structured Critique forum. Everything I post ends up in the Open Critique forum and much of the information is garbled.

Thanks for looking!

Herb

[robertsloan2]

I like the colors and your composition very much. It's neat to see something like this blown way up out of proportion. You have smooth gradations and strong value changes.

Burnishing the background with a Colour Shaper or the end of a spoon to get rid of the little white specks might be cool, unless you deliberately left them to give it a contrasting texture. I'd probably burnish those areas.

The texture of the acorn caps is a good contrast to the smooth texture on the leaf and the nut. I think you are working toward impressionism rather than realism here. I wouldn't recommend changing it now. Maybe in a later painting you could try doing the bumps in realism -- there's usually a manageable number of them and their shape is very defined.

On this one I would look very close at the shape of both caps on your model. Turn it till it's at the same angle and compare it to your drawing, or snap a photo reference and compare that shape to what you have. The cap shapes are usually a rounded conical shape something like a squashed onion-top minaret, and what you have is three dimensional and well shadowed and highlighted, but angular more like a Russian hat. It may not take much to adjust the shapes to make them more accurate.

But go from life, go back to the original acorns for those shapes. I could not tell you exactly what the shapes are without holding the acorns in my hand. The upper left one seems more distorted than the lower one. The lower right one is more distorted on the right side of it than on the left. The upper left one seems more distorted on its lower side than its upper side.

The nuts themselves are beautiful, perfectly shaped and smoothed.

You may want to look closely at the leaf for a pattern of veins -- the next level of vein patterning. You have some veins drawn in good proportion and on the left side behind the acorn there's an area where the veins you have drawn should continue, at least one of them. Do smaller veins a little looser maybe, with lines closer to the value of their background, occasional small highlights where spaces between may be rounded or catch some reflected light.

Again that's pushing toward realism and I'm not sure if you want to go there or just create a pleasing pattern. Overall composition is great and the smooth shading you have as a base on the leaf is wonderful -- I hope these suggestions help. If none of them are to your liking, maybe by disagreeing that'll help you think of something that brings you closer to what you want!

[Pat Isaac]

There is still a glitch in the structured critique forum and everything goes to the Open critque forum. Not everything is fixed yet.
I really like the composition of this painting and the close crop. The light in the lower right is wonderful. If the light is on the top of the upper left acorn, I would think there would be more light on the top end of the cap. I do like the reflected light on the bottom side. In the lower acorn you have some hint of green and I would like to see some in the upper acorn.
Nice piece, Herb and I like your previous acorn studies also. this is a good way to really get a grasp on a subject.

Pat

[Herb]

Thanks for taking time to offer a critique, Robert. I really appreciate it! I'm torn about the background. The white specks are not nearly so obvious in real life, but they still give it a "floating in outer space" look. They do add a bit of life to it. I'm afraid if I blend them out the background might look dull. What's a boy to do? I'm sort of stuck with one foot pulling toward realism and one pulling toward impressionism. I guess I should make up my mind! Ahh...those caps. My "impressionist" approach is not so apparent in real life. The "impression" is more complete and realistic with the individual marks not so obvious as in the photo. Still, a more realistic approach would probably have been more effective. I fixed the shapes a little since I posted. They are a bit wonky in real life actually. I chose those two acorns for that reason. Still, I didn't do them justice. (See below.) I stopped short of putting in more veins, partly because I didn't think I could pull it off, and partly because I didn't want to draw too much attention to the leaf. I was mostly interested in the light. I have added the continuation of the main vein out the left side...just missed that one somehow. Again, I appreciate your thoughtful critique. It's given me several things to consider.

Hi, Pat. Thanks for commenting! I went back and looked at the light on the upper cap. You were right on the money. I added some when I touched up the shape and it helped a lot. I also added some subtle (I think.) streaks of green, russet, and violet in both acorns. They were there before but not very noticeable, especially in the photo for some reason. (I still can't take a decent photo to save my soul.)

Sorry I never show up unless I want some feedback. Maybe some day I'll have more time to spare...or win the lottery. Ha!

Cheers,

Herb

[Peiwend]

Herb, you've done a good job on this and have gotten some good suggestions. In the photograph there is some light coming through the leaf from the primary light source, as well as some cool colours on the leaf from the secondary light source. I think these would add greatly to what is already a very good painting.

_______________________________-Wendell

[Scarefishcrow]

Herb, Hi
Good to see you again. Since everyone has given you lots of suggestions and pretty well commented on any suggestions that would seem appropriate, I get to be the nice guy and say "Job well done!"

I think you have enough advice on this one and this is a great leap from the last acorn study. Full of light and very subtle textures and blending. You have continued to progress in your work and congratulations on that.

Hope to see more from you when you get the chance (or win the lottery )

Bill

[starblue]

Hi Herb. I thought you did this one really well. The macro view right off catches the eye, augmented by the dark negative spaces around the side. There's the nice rim lighting on the leaf edges and the great texture on the acorn heads. But mostly it's your rendition of the illumination that really pulls it off. I like how the leaf vein gets lost while crossing the triangle of brilliant light--it would look like that in real life. Then there's the way the light modulates because of the leaf's translucency. While your colors are all warm, I don't think that's necessarily a bad thing--it provides a sense of cheer and coziness to the painting. I'd say well done--now go frame it!

[RainySea]

Love this composition. . . the colors are so warm and compelling. And the details on the top of those acorns is amazing! Well, done!

BTW, I at first thought suggesting blending the background to remove the white dots but there are some dots in other parts of the painting and I think they sort of make it all fit together and give it a bit more of a textured feeling.

[Herb]

Thanks for taking time to comment, Wendell. I took a stab at enhancing the light areas of the leaf and adding some violets to the darker areas. I think it may be beyond my ability at this stage in this piece. I just barely managed to recover to a point where I can quit!

I wish I could spend more time in the forum, Bill. I feel terrible asking for advise and comment when I offer so little in return. But, hey, prosperity and early retirement is just around the corner…(That sound is me whistling past the graveyard.)

Thanks, Bob. I probably should have stopped and framed it. It doesn’t seem as warm to me now as before, but there are other parts I like better now, so I guess it was a good enough trade. The warm light is what attracted me in the first place.

Thanks, Rainy. I appreciate your comment about the composition. I started twice to draw the original composition (photo size) then decided to zoom in on what interested me most. Also, after considerable thought, I did blend out the white specs in the background. I was doubtful, but I think it made a much bigger difference (in a good way) than I imagined it would.

Here’s the latest…and final...for this piece. I sure do appreciate everyone’s help.



Cheers,

Herb

[Scarefishcrow]

Good finish, Herb. We always appreciate seeing your work whenever you can. Sometimes life gets in the way of the important things like art, doesn't it!



Unfortunately, most of us prefer to eat food rather than paintings!

Bill

[RainySea]

Your are so right, Herb! Wow, I didn't think I could like that one more but I do. Its just amazing. The colors are so warm and inviting.

[Pat Isaac]

Fantastic finish, Herb. A stunner.

Pat

[Herb]

Pat, Rainy, and Bill...Thanks!

[Yusuke]

Herb,

The quality of this work is great! Especially, I really liked the way you expressed the bright part on the leaves. Of course, acorns are nicely modelled.

[robertsloan2]

Herb, this is magnificent. The light you added pulled it all together, and your shapes were closer to the real acorns than I thought. Your impressionistic effect is very powerful. I think it reads better now that all the strong lights are in to support it, the light is consistent now.

Frame it and hang it! Glorious painting. Very glad I was able to help - sometimes if a suggestion's rejected it can lead to the idea that does work. This one rules!