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Old 09-21-2004, 08:26 PM
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jbitzel jbitzel is offline
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Clearwater eve

This is part of a two part series, where I was born and where I live now. This is clearwater where I live now. I am hard to upset so hit me with your best crits.
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Old 09-21-2004, 10:09 PM
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champagneharley champagneharley is offline
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Re: Clearwater eve

Basically I like your painting. I am partial to sunrises and sunsets over water, anyway.
Your sky blending and color is super.
Is your sun round? I know it can sometimes distort in the haze of the horizon, which is fine if you can indicate it rather than a clear sky.
Initially I thought you had centrally placed the pelican in the painting, but then saw the other posts. I probably would have put the bird more to the right side of the painting somehow, or perhaps add another post to the left side, perhaps one that is sloped as if part of a old structure.
With the posts I would, ever so finely add a SLIVER of yellow light down the horizonal edge, except if the post is a direct silhouette of the sun. If the posts are to the right of the sun, then the sliver of reflected light would be on the left side of these posts - VERY slender if near the center of the picture and a tiny bit more if any other post further away from the center.
For the posts left of the sun, the horizontal light would be on the right side. Again slimmer on posts nearest the sun.
I can't see your painting while posting - if the bird is not directly in front of the sun this should also have a tiny sliver of outline on the appropriate side.
I think mainly the bands of reflection in the water could do with some work so that they are not so 'regular'. As a modern type abstract painting I do not find them out of place, but don't think that is what you intended.
As things go back to the horizon, wavelets and ripples diminish, therefore the darker gaps between these stripes should start to merge going upwards from past the posts, up to the horizon, where they should be fully blended with no or almost no dark.
I think you mean the posts to be posts plus reflection. This gives you a really good chance to add a lot of life and interest to the painting.
Wavelets and refected light can do some really great things.
I would make all posts as if they are in the water at the same level (but you can vary them). Bearing in mind that posts are round I would do the following.
In the water directly midway behind the posts where you determine they enter the water - leave that totally dark - but with a file reflected light line, I would bring a partial arc - maybe about 1/4 of the way in - not even on every pole, but to suggest the roundness of the poles, and that they are going into the water. But being solid they are silhouettes, but some reflected light will hit the waves and help you give the water the movement you need.
Then in the dark pole reflection going down towards the base of the painting I would start bringing in some extended reflection into the solid. Don't overdo this, and try for not being to uniform. Then near the bottom of the solid shadows extend one line at least, all the way through the reflection - not too thick though.
Hope you understand this. Your colors and ideas behind this painting are really great!
Even with these complex suggestions, this may be not what you're wanting to portray - so hope this may just give you ideas.
Regards,
Jillian
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Old 09-22-2004, 07:39 AM
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jbitzel jbitzel is offline
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Re: Clearwater eve

I am strongly considering your highlights on the posts idea. There is actually a pelican in the painting, it's kind of hidden, on top of the post to the left of center. The sun is infact not round but in the refrence photo the sun is so bright that fog doesnt show. I am not at home so I cant upload the refrence
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Old 09-22-2004, 12:14 PM
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champagneharley champagneharley is offline
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Re: Clearwater eve

Quote:
Originally Posted by candienjames
I am strongly considering your highlights on the posts idea. There is actually a pelican in the painting, it's kind of hidden, on top of the post to the left of center. The sun is infact not round but in the refrence photo the sun is so bright that fog doesnt show. I am not at home so I cant upload the refrence
My comments are only 'ideas' for you to consider.
All art depends on the creator (artist), as to what YOU want to do and accomplish/portray with your work.
It would be nice to see the pelican stand out a little. As the sun is still raised in the sky, it probably wouldn't be out of the question to have a little light from the sun on the sun side of his feet, head, back.
Since you are working from a photo, maybe look closely and see if you can see these things.
Sometimes a photo is not the best to copy from, in so much that in a photo we can accept things that are slightly askew or not as they normally appear - but in an artwork, we can't. Your artwork has to show the whole story and not leave people guessing, as people won't be saying - yes that's how it is in the photo - because they won't get to see the photo. So always beware of following a photo what you might think of as being 'exact'.
I think you should be well pleased with this work overall.
Regards,
Jillian
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Old 09-22-2004, 12:20 PM
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jbitzel jbitzel is offline
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Re: Clearwater eve

very true indeed. I recently did a painting of a frog where the feet looked a little funny, I should have made them up but at least I learned something. Well, I am glad there are people like you to make the forum great.
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Old 09-22-2004, 12:34 PM
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champagneharley champagneharley is offline
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Re: Clearwater eve

Quote:
Originally Posted by candienjames
very true indeed. I recently did a painting of a frog where the feet looked a little funny, I should have made them up but at least I learned something. Well, I am glad there are people like you to make the forum great.
Exactly!
Thank you for your comment, too. I like to think I'm of some help - or at least of helping the thought process.
Regards,
Jillian
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