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Old 01-13-2018, 10:59 PM
@teulis @teulis is offline
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With a Thorn

MY IMAGE(S):



GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: With a Tho<br>
Year Created:
Medium: Watercolor Pencil
Surface: Watercolor Paper
Dimension: 22
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I intended to create something a bit more abstract, but it ended up being only partially so.

The story is the mermaid bringing down something from the terrestrial world and paying with blood.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
How are the shadows and lights? I tried to make dark shadows but am not sure if I need to go darker.

Does the twisting body look confusing? You see the unde<br>eath of the tailfin at one end and the back of the head at the other.

Is the separation of hair/face clear enough?

Any c & c is appreciated!
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Old 01-15-2018, 03:18 PM
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La_ La_ is online now
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Re: With a Thorn

the image was showing the [yellow] sky on the left edge so i flipped it to be on the top.

so, she's diving/falling back into the water with a rose, right, she's not actually back in the water, correct? i'd be very tempted to add her reflection on the water to help show that. or perhaps she's still too far above the water for a reflection to show? in which case, would she be paying in blood, yet?

la
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Old 01-15-2018, 05:15 PM
@teulis @teulis is offline
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Re: With a Thorn

Hi la - thanks for flipping it right side up.

I failed with the style. I intended to be abstract - so the water/sky are abstract. She is actually supposed to be underwater already. I don't see how I can salvage that part to make it more realistic.

She's swimming down, escaping, and turning to look back up, where she came from. I'm wondering if I should lighten the sky and keep the deeper yellows right in the spot she's looking at.

I've been looking at this so long and any input will help.
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Old 01-15-2018, 06:58 PM
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Re: With a Thorn

oh, well then, i think you'll need to let some water streak across her, envelope her - she's too crisp and she's moving, which means the water is moving around her. ... you could also streak some light lines coming down through the water, towards her from the surface ... fill your kitchen sink, move your hand around in the water and watch how it moves as it follows your hand, it's cool.

i found this super minimal, simple, subtle example to give you a glimmer of what i mean, but there's lots of examples if you google it

la
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http://yourstrulyart.blogspot.ca Peace - When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know Peace
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Old 01-15-2018, 09:59 PM
@teulis @teulis is offline
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Smile Re: With a Thorn

I totally see what you're saying. I agree - movement in the water and immersion in it would have improved this piece immensely.

Ok - I'm moving on to oil pastels and will do another mermaid keeping these things in mind. Pastels are so much more forgiving than watercolors when it comes to correcting large areas.

I appreciate your input - nothing like an artist's eye to see what you can't see right in front of you.

Thank you!
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