Rototai (Pleas place in structured critique)

mjkohler · #1 05-14-2011, 07:00 AM

MY IMAGE(S):

GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Rototai (Pleas place in structured critique)
Year Created:
Medium: Oil Bar
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 1 metre x 400mm approx
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I am a messy painter. Hopefully when this is properly dry a few glazes will help freshen this up. please excuse the paintbrushes sticking out the top they are not part of the composition.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
I know comic books are a valid type of art however i dont want to paint comic book style. If this looks like one then I need to make some changes. Does that hill in the middle bother anyone?

mjkohler · #2 05-14-2011, 09:08 PM

I think that I know why the hill is bothering me. It is the preciseness of it in comparison to the treatment of the trees in front. I need some lost and found edges to it. I think that will also push it back a little. A splash of vivid colour in the left front will also help with that.

mjkohler · #3 05-14-2011, 10:03 PM

Hopefully this is working a little better. However tree on right will have to be cooled down a little with some glasing. I think.

mjkohler · #4 05-19-2011, 10:00 PM

**La_** · #5 05-24-2011, 12:04 PM

well hmm ... you had me but for the extra weight on the right ... adding the brightness also on the right pulls my eyes there all the more but i think moreso is the spiked messy hairdo of the bramble on the right that mostly does the heavy to that side effect and i long to see more of the wonderful sky behind it.

la

mjkohler · #6 05-24-2011, 06:03 PM

Thank you for your reply La_ I had hoped that I had overcome the strength of the right hand side. I have tried picking up some contrast on the right of the painting to see if that would work. It's not 100% but it is improving I think.

mjkohler · #7 05-25-2011, 07:17 PM

Gasp!! I hope this has done it.

mjkohler · #8 05-31-2011, 04:07 AM

Excuse my multiple postings and changes of this painting. I find that when i am painting I often get to stage where I think that I have finished. What is different this time is that I KNOW that I have finished.

WMCD · #9 10-15-2011, 02:44 AM

One thing that I think your landscapes can benefit from in the future is taking contrasting values into consideration. Separation of foreground/background/sky/water is key, and using light values versus darks in relation to depth can help you there.

That aside, I love the energy of your brush strokes. You worked through that problem area on the right (our right) perfectly, keeping some of the abstract qualities present while still making the visual information more apparent to the viewer.

mjkohler · #10 10-15-2011, 06:31 PM

Thank you for your reply. I believe that I cahnged the painting again from this. However I am away from home and not able to publish what I finished with in the end for several days. In the finished painting I believe that some areas that were good on the left were lost. I think that I could have lost some of the energy. In retrospect afterwards I did see areas where a tonal range could have helped. I also made a change to the mid area. This is an area that I walk a lot. The painting was done with a photo on the internet for reference. Thank you again for your critique. I will post the finished picture when home.

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