This jolly old gent travels the highways, playgrounds and dingy back alleys of Scotland brining joy and wonder to all the good little boys and girls. If they're really well behaved and cover their eyes Mr. Gloom even takes them into his magic van to see his secret recipes. None of them are ever heard of again but their mates say the burgers are cracking.
Believe it or not this monstrosity was based on an actual kid's entertainer who lived in my home town (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtDF8lopvxI)
. He was successful enough to get a show on the BBC but he fell on hard times after he got done for drunk driving (My Dad bumped into him in the local shop buying whiskey at 1 in the afternoon in his dressing gown).
The Spotty thing in the middle is based on the worst thing to come out of Britain since the Bengal Famine (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h37KQu64RY4)