Home Member Services Content Areas Tools Info Center WC Partners Shop Help
Search for:

Welcome to the WetCanvas forums. You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions, articles and access our other FREE features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload your own photos and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please visit our help center.

Go Back   WetCanvas > The Town Center > Café Guerbois
User Name
Register Mark Forums Read

Salute to our Partners
WC! Sponsors

Our Sponsors
Closed Thread
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-23-2012, 03:00 PM
Katie Black's Avatar
Katie Black Katie Black is offline
A Local Legend
Costa Rica
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 6,276
Hails from Costa Rica

Where I live it seems its culturally acceptable to never return emails, pretend you have not received a text message, and return phone calls days later and so on...it's really bad here, the weird thing is I think in some messed up kind of way people think they are giving you the impression that they are super busy, therefore desirable company, if that makes sense?

What they now know is that its a deal breaker for me. I think I have changed over the last year, I have wised up, I don't tolerate bad manners anymore..and I feel a lot better for it, what this means is that I have cut some "friends" out of my life, and I feel a lot happier for it.

I recently sent emails out to three Estate agents informing them my house phone was not working and to try using my mobile if someone was interested in viewing my property...I did not get one email back acknowledging this email, is that too much to expect really? bearing in mind I have entrusted these people to sell my house...it seems this behaviour is everywhere, and I struggle with it, can't understand it.

At what point did it become acceptable behaviour to ignore emails? I think its rife everywhere though, what do you think?
  #2   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-23-2012, 04:43 PM
caldwell.brobeck's Avatar
caldwell.brobeck caldwell.brobeck is offline
A WetCanvas! Patron Saint
Dartmouth, Nova Scotia
Join Date: Jun 2004
Posts: 3,787
Hails from Canada
Re: Manners

In a business relationship, I'm surprised that your recipients didn't acknowledge your email. That's just bad business.

But on personal communications I think it is wrong to expect a response, particularly if the communication is unsolicited and doesn't require one. Most people I know I'll see in person within a few days or maybe a week or two. If I still remember the email I can discuss it with them then. Essentially I'm fine with people ignoring unessential emails. As for the phone, I rarely answer it, I'm not usually in a mood to stop whatever I'm doing and chat. Leave a message and I usually (eventually) get back to the caller.

Funny thing though is that if someone actually makes the effort to drop in, I'm usually more than happy to stop, put on the coffee, and kill some time. About the only time I won't is if I have a model present (but my friends know that).
C&C of all sorts always welcome! (I don't mind rude or harsh criticism.)
I suppose I have to do this too (my blog, & current work). My Visual Arts Nova Scotia page.
Art is the most intense mode of individualism that the world has known - Oscar Wilde
Look for yourself, think for yourself, draw your own conclusions. Then own them.
  #3   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-23-2012, 06:17 PM
snoball's Avatar
snoball snoball is offline
A WC! Legend
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 27,374
Hails from United States
Re: Manners

Katie, I think you are right that it is rife everywhere. I think email is new enough that people do not know accepted etiquette for it. I seldom expect a reply to jokes and funny pictures but when I ask questions, it would be nice to send a short reply with the answer. I almost always at least acknowledge emails, even the goofy stuff, but you are right many do not even acknowledge a "formal" email. I have to send copies of my sister's bank statements to an agency once a month and until recently they have seldom been acknowledged. I requested that they just hit *reply* even if they don't type anthing. And no, their email client has no option to send a read receipt.
Probably the same etiquette should apply that applies to written hard copy, but then, I was never good at answering the letters I could hold in my hand.

You never realize what you have until it is gone. Toilet paper is a good example.
My work on Facebook
  #4   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-23-2012, 07:22 PM
La_'s Avatar
La_ La_ is offline
A WC! Legend
Alberta, where coyotes look both ways before crossing the highway
Join Date: Jun 2006
Posts: 15,447
Hails from Canada
Re: Manners

definitely bad business to not reply to confirm they got your (rather important) e-mail.

it's rare that i respond to any of the fluff and stuff i get via email - unless it's a super duper fantastic joke that i'll thank them for.

if it's a 'letter' from a personal friend, i always respond.

have learned to add in bold or CAPS to "PLEASE REPLY so I know you've received ... " when i want a reply and usually that works, but it's also usually business or party pleasures and people are happy to reply.

texting, well, i hate texting and only use it when necessary, but it is handy and i expect a reply. usually i get one and would be annoyed if i didn't.

all in all tho, really, i've learned that technology is not entirely reliable and if it's a truly important issue and i'm not getting a response - i phone.

Pacis, der Frieden, Mir, Shanti, Friour, Paz, Pace, Kapayapaan, Fred, Piersica, Taika, Aman, Beke, Miers, Shalom, Salam السلام, Heping, Mir (Мир),Paix,Ειρήνη
http://yourstrulyart.blogspot.ca Peace - When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know Peace
Latin, German, Serbian, Bengali, Icelandic, Brazilian, Italian, Filipino, Swedish, Romanian, Lithuanian, Hindi/Urdu, Hungarian, Latvian, Hebrew, Arabic, Chinese, Russian, French,Greek
  #5   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-23-2012, 09:45 PM
Gaffette Gaffette is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 193
Hails from United States
Re: Manners

Yeah. I have noticed this. I really make an effort to reply to business emails right away or if it is something I need time for I will acknowledge receipt and let them know I need a few days to properly reply. I have had a lot of people not reply at all to business emails. One consignment place I sent an email confirming a date to drop off work and they have not replied yet. The drop off date was in the end of January. Stuff from friends it depends on if I feel like chatting which I very rarely do so people know if they really want to talk to get together. Long distance friends are the exception to that. I just find it annoying when a person lives five minutes away and can't be bothered to come over but texts my ear off.
"I've been wrong on more occasions than I'd like to recognize, but there's room in our vocation if we read between the lines." F.M.
  #6   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-24-2012, 08:56 AM
RiJoRi's Avatar
RiJoRi RiJoRi is offline
Veteran Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 520
Hails from United States
Re: Manners

Here at work, I've been spoiled by e-mail messages of the "OMG! The sky is falling! HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!" type. At first, I started working on this problem, only to get an "Oooops! Never mind!" message a few days later. So I now let the OMG messages sit for a while.

Another thing we have with Outlook is the ability to tag messages to get a reply (a) when the message arrives in the recipient's mailbox, and (b) when the recipient reads it. While this does not excuse the poor manners, it does give me some feedback.

Another thing that irks me is when there's a mass e-mailing here at work, and a recipient does a "reply all"!! I am really and truly uninterested in your private comments to the sender!

So many colors, so little time...
  #7   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-24-2012, 11:25 AM
Keith Russell's Avatar
Keith Russell Keith Russell is offline
A WC! Legend
Lenexa, Kansas, USA
Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 34,145
Hails from United States
Re: Manners

I am not trying to appear very busy; I am very busy!

Nonetheless, I try to respond to texts immediately. If I don't respond to a text, I either overlooked it, or didn't receive it. (Linda and I have often "compared" our phones, verifying that "Phone A" can show that a text was sent to "Phone B", which "Phone B" never received.)

I try to return personal emails within 24 hours.
Forcing the waveform to collapse for sixteen years...
  #8   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-24-2012, 10:02 PM
savedbyhim01 savedbyhim01 is offline
New Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 27
Re: Manners

Here it is being late. Everyone is late. Real estate agents will purposefully show up late because they expect you to be late. You tell them ahead of time that you are not going to be late, you call them 5 minutes before you get there and tell them to leave, and they will still wait until you get to the meeting place to set off. Its very irritating.
Jason Dexter
Part Time Teacher - Living in China
Chinese Calligraphy Scrolls and Art
  #9   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-24-2012, 11:23 PM
vmrs's Avatar
vmrs vmrs is offline
Western Illinois
Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 17,373
Hails from United States
Re: Manners

I can't stand lateness, that's a pet peeve of mine.
Email wise, if it's a personal note I reply right away. And definitely for business matters.
If it's one of those forward things, or chain letter emails, I delete it right away. if a person does that too much, I ask them nicely to stop and if they don't I block them.

I got rid of my cellphone, so I don't text, I can't stand them.
Virginia ~ The Purple Dog Painting Blog
Encourage a fellow Artist! Please welcome new members here.
WetCanvas FAQ's How to post an Image Miniature Forum Fantasy/Sci-Fi Art Forum
  #10   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-25-2012, 04:14 AM
mek42's Avatar
mek42 mek42 is offline
Senior Member
central NY
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 231
Hails from United States
Re: Manners

I think there is also a significant generational difference (maybe generational implies too large an age range) in response etiquette.

If you, the sender of an email, just want assurance that it was received, why aren't you using read receipts? It is rude of me to waste your time by sending "received" to your routine non-inquiry email. At least, that is my opinion.

I'm also just barely old enough and rural enough in upbringing to have missed the text fad. As such, I consider texts to be email lite / email when afk / fire dept. pages. If it was urgent you would have called (except for fire dept. pages, that is a special thing and pretty much the only reason I got texting).
  #11   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-25-2012, 10:12 AM
bleu's Avatar
bleu bleu is offline
Veteran Member
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 706
Hails from Canada
Re: Manners

I find myself on the rude, procrastinating side. The very day I saw the original post I picked up a phone message asking me to let me know when I was at the gallery so this acquaintance could meet me there as her studio is nearby. Well, I was ON MY WAY to the gallery but they were closing in 30 minutes. I didn't call because I figured I'd call on a day when there was more time. Wouldn't you know it, she drove by and came in. I explained but I had more 'splainin' (Desi) to do -- She had called me a few weeks before with this message: "Please call me back."
This didn't get my a.. in gear. I ignored it. yes I did. Sometimes I wait 48 hours before responding to emails and I often don't call back if I don't know what it's about -- unless the voice is trembling and needy.
Business -- that's another story. Why on earth would a person who needs your money or hopes to get it, be as rude as i am to my acquaintances?
  #12   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-25-2012, 01:03 PM
ianuk ianuk is offline
A WC! Legend
South West of England.
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 12,990
Hails from England
Re: Manners

Anyone that thinks business's are polite or have manners should try waiting ninety days after an invoice has been submitted. Where months of hard work, labour and material costs have already been paid by the contractor. Wages still have to be paid and everything else. Problem is the contractor is basically (with work hard to come by), at their mercy. I think many small business's have folded simply because of this time taken to pay...
  #13   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-25-2012, 05:22 PM
Katie Black's Avatar
Katie Black Katie Black is offline
A Local Legend
Costa Rica
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 6,276
Hails from Costa Rica
Re: Manners

Hey thanks for your replies...I sounded a little tense

Problem is I will admit people ignoring emails is my Pet Peeve!..I am so laid back about almost everything but this is the one thing that can set my teeth on edge!

I think in future I will have to phone...although I couldnt in this instance, but I will in future I think.

  #14   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-29-2012, 02:47 PM
jumper's Avatar
jumper jumper is offline
Veteran Member
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 857
Hails from United States
Re: Manners

I agree with you, Katie. And it's getting worse. It's like people don't even know that there are tons of ways that you can verify whether they called you or night, emailed you, or whatever.

I read a book a long time ago that compared friends with a garden. From time to time you just have to get rid of the weeds

The electronic age seems to have given certain type of people the idea that things are not "personal" anymore. When in reality. It's even more so than now. The only good thing I can think of is that as each generation grows up, maybe they will understand "manners" in the electronic age.
  #15   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-30-2012, 01:13 AM
bleu's Avatar
bleu bleu is offline
Veteran Member
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 706
Hails from Canada
Re: Manners

I certainly agree I need to tune up my manners on email. But you know, some of us (I am) are so distracted by so much communication, being plugged in all the time. Remember when (if you are older) you used to rush home to see if there was MAIL? And how you carried the precious letter around with you for a week, reading and re reading it and you answered that letter with another precious letter? Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. I enjoy my emails but I am lax. I'll work on it.

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 02:35 AM.

© 2014 F+W All rights reserved.