City Park

[eyecandy2]

MY IMAGE(S):





GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: City Park
Year Created:
Medium: Oil
Surface: Linen
Dimension: 16 x 20
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I can't find the original posting so am showing my updated version here. It is the top one. The bottom one is the original.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
Would like to hear what you think of the changes

[Wassie]

I like the top one best. It really sparkles.

[D.W. Flint]

I like the bottom one. It has more of a wintery feel to it...

[philbe123]

i like the bottom one best. it has the winter feel, it's soft and easy on the eye.

the sky in the top one just appears to me as daylight and the building lights are on as well as the floodlights. if it had a deep purple in the horizon, it could set the mood better.

[Margaretta]

You've turned a dreary, cold night into The Night Before Christmas!
I love the updated, sparkly version.

There may be a slight lean to the left from the buildings at that side.

The ice looks wonderfully glassier and the colours bring the picture alive. This is your next Year's Christmas card.

Where did you get that vibrant sky blue? Gorgeous colour. Be careful. You can see where you've brushed around the buildings but this may not be the case if the picture were against the wall.

[Nayana]

I like the changes, it is like it changed the time of day, it makes the piece feel warmer even though there are so many cool colors.

[eyecandy2]

I am studying with a very fine artist and a wonderful teacher so I took this painting in for him to critique it and this was what he said.
You have two painting here and you have to put them together. The top is one and the bottom with the skaters and the snow is another
The shaded sides of the building should be darkend to increase the contranst between the linghted side and the shaded side with core shadows at the corners.
He would like to lighten the tops of the trees to show how the light from the banks of light are highlighting them
He would like more shadows and footsteps in the snow on the shore.
He would like the edge of the skatinig area darkened and the shodows of the skaters more dominient.
He would like shadows of the trees on the ice and they should be double shadows since there are two souces of light so each casts its own shadow.
and, mabe even cast a shadow from the buildings on the ice.
He felt this could integrate the top half of the painting with the bottom half.
Do I hear any comments for my fellow artists?

[Margaretta]

Some of us are just learning and not qualified or experienced EyeCandy2 and by reading critiques, comparing, looking, and commenting it makes us think a bit harder and therefore acquire more knowledge. It may also help the artist to sort some issues which he or she is free to reject, accept or even ignore. I'm sure people are happy for their critical observations to be challenged but not their personal reactions to each painting as the latter are entirely subjective and they are free to express them. Your teacher is qualified and will therefore be able to give a much deeper reflection on your painting. Another element may be that members of WC seem to be more inclined to support through praise so as not to completely deflate the artist but to encourage improvement. It is good to have a balanced criticism rather than a totally negative one however truthful that may be. But it should be instructive.

Your teacher gave some brilliant, detailed observations. Personally I like the contrasts between top and bottom. The eye is carried upwards from the calm, frozen fun to the dazzling business of the lights in the skyscrapers heralding those who are working as opposed to those below having fun. I'm going to give the simplest response, not a critique as before: I like it.

[eyecandy2]

Please note that I have shared my teacher's critique with you and any that care to read it as a learning experience. I thought that it was worth while for others to read a very professional critique. I'm sure that we can all learn from it.

[totsy]

[QUOTEHe would like shadows of the trees on the ice and they should be double shadows since there are two souces of light so each casts its own shadow. and, mabe even cast a shadow from the buildings on the ice.
][/quote]

I've just rivetted this in my brain for future reference. Thanks Eye Candy.

And yes, I love the top painting best.

[eyecandy2]

totsy, I agree and am working on that now. I've put shadows on the ice and they are double shadows from the two sources of light. I'm not sure how to project the shadows of the buildings on the ice, but I'm playing with it.

[silvenus]

I find your teachers comments very encouraging since he raises the same comment as I did with regard to shadows from 2 light sources. your previous was called 'in the park' and is currently page 5 .
be interested to see your next attempt at revision.
good luck, Brian