WetCanvas
Home Member Services Content Areas Tools Info Center WC Partners Shop Help
Channels:
Search for:
in:

Welcome to the WetCanvas forums. You are currently viewing our boards as a guest which gives you limited access to view most discussions, articles and access our other FREE features. By joining our free community you will have access to post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), respond to polls, upload your own photos and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free so please, join our community today!

If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please visit our help center.

Go Back   WetCanvas > The Art Business Center > General Art Business
User Name
Password
Register Mark Forums Read

Salute to our Partners
WC! Sponsors

Our Sponsors
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #46   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-14-2012, 01:51 PM
artyczar
 
Posts: n/a
 
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

You can forgive whether you are a Christian or not. In Hebrew the word is slch (סלח), to forgive. It is a divine act to do such a thing, as of G-d.
Reply With Quote
  #47   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-15-2012, 11:45 AM
bleu bleu is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 417
 
Hails from Canada
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

Quote:
Originally Posted by Donald_Smith
PS: IF you're a Christian, just remember the "Lord's prayer." "Forgive us as we forgive others." If we don't forgive, what happens then? If you're not a Christian, then ignore this PS:..

I'm a Christian. I don't think you must actively, consciously 'forgive' someone who hasn't asked for your forgiveness and continues on the path. Archer will not be seeing this 'mentor' to offer the unasked for forgiveness. I think it's more subtle than that.

I have a friend whose marriage was bad due to the manipulations and dishonesty of her husband. He ran up her credit cards, tried to convince her that she was the cause of all his complexes, etc. Well, she divorced him and to this day she harbours no ill feelings -- honestly and truly! She says that if it weren't for him she wouldn't have been bold enough to go the places he took her in the course of his work.. She has friends in interesting places because of his erratic ways. He never felt he did anything wrong, that that all the perks she provided were his due. He would have laughed at her forgiveness. What she did after she left him goes much deeper than 'forgiveness.' She was grateful for her gains and bitterness is truly not part of her nature. The worst she says of him is that he was a 'troubled man.' She is not religious. I admire her.
Reply With Quote
  #48   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-15-2012, 03:42 PM
Donald_Smith's Avatar
Donald_Smith Donald_Smith is offline
Immortalized
Heart of Missouri's Outback!
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 4,500
 
Hails from United States
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

Bleu,

I never told Archer to tell the person "I forgive you." I told Archer to tell himself that he forgives the person. The anger he is harboring will go away if he can forgive the person in his heart. He doesn't need to talk to the bad mentor to accomplish forgiving him.

Besides, in the Lord's prayer, it doesn't say, "Forgive others when they ask you to forgive them." It says,"Forgive us our debts as we forgive others." So isn't it better to forgive someone in your own heart, than it is to harbor anger and resentment in your heart towards them? In the end, forgiving them, will help the person doing the forgiving.

Have a wonderful day,
Donald
__________________
"We are never really happy until we try to brighten the lives of others." Helen Keller
My Webpage
My Pinterest Account
Reply With Quote
  #49   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-15-2012, 04:36 PM
RobinZ's Avatar
RobinZ RobinZ is online now
A WC! Legend
Almost Philadelphia
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 15,824
 
Hails from United States
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

I don't know, Donald, is it really forgiveness if we are doing it just to make ourselves feel better? Letting go is not the same thing as forgiving. At least not to me.

Do you think God forgives people who are not sorry?
__________________
Robin
My Custom Portraits
Reply With Quote
  #50   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-15-2012, 08:21 PM
bleu bleu is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 417
 
Hails from Canada
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

Quote:
Originally Posted by RobinZ
Do you think God forgives people who are not sorry?

Good question. I'd say that in context of organized religion, the responsibility belongs to the sinner. The sinner must recognize his sin -- right?
Reply With Quote
  #51   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-15-2012, 09:01 PM
Donald_Smith's Avatar
Donald_Smith Donald_Smith is offline
Immortalized
Heart of Missouri's Outback!
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 4,500
 
Hails from United States
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

Robin,

Please show me the verse that supports your ideas.

Here are some that support mine.

Mt 6:14 For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
Mt 5:44 But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you;
Mt 6:15 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.
Mt 18:21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? (Please note, Peter didn't ask "When they ask for forgiveness."
Mt 18:35 So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you, if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
Mr 11:25 And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.
Mr 11:26 But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.
Lu 6:35 But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.
Lu 6:37 Judge not, and ye shall not be judged: condemn not, and ye shall not be condemned: forgive, and ye shall be forgiven:

Archer, I'm sorry this thread has turned into a debate. If anyone wants to continue this discussion, we can use my Facebook page.

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1223212959

If that doesn't work, please search for Donald Smith.

Thank you for the interesting discussion, I've been enjoying the challenge and research of defending my views. I just don't think Wetcanvas is the proper place since it isn't about art.

Have a great day,
Donald
__________________
"We are never really happy until we try to brighten the lives of others." Helen Keller
My Webpage
My Pinterest Account
Reply With Quote
  #52   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 12:11 AM
d-archer d-archer is offline
New Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 28
 
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

I think you have all offered very interesting and helpful insight. I have been having trouble forgiving this particular person who hurt me. Believe me, I have tried. I know that the forgiving is for me and not for him, but it's still hard. I try to say to myself, "I forgive this man. He must have a lot of internal issues to treat others this way.", but at the same time I think to myself, "That dirty rat #$%!!" I suppose this will dissipate over time.
Reply With Quote
  #53   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 12:20 AM
d-archer d-archer is offline
New Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 28
 
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

This topic of forgiveness is an important one, as there may be other artists out there reading this thread who experienced similar betrayal or discouraging words from people whose opinion they valued.
Reply With Quote
  #54   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 04:24 AM
Azure Wings's Avatar
Azure Wings Azure Wings is offline
Enthusiast
Napa Valley, California
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Posts: 1,092
 
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

All the best to you, d-archer! It's a tough one. I wrestle with my ability (or inability) to forgive those who do me wrong, too....

Here's a link about a book that addresses the topic of forgiveness - The Sunflower, by Simon Wiesenthal: http://students.cis.uab.edu/tiff88/sunflower.html

In it, Wiesenthal poses a situation that happened to him, and asks, "What would you do?" Then the book includes a series of thoughtful - and varied - answers - by people of different backgrounds and faiths, all about forgiveness and how to respond. It's very good.

Hoping this is helpful,
Karen
Reply With Quote
  #55   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 04:41 AM
kadon's Avatar
kadon kadon is offline
Lord of the Arts
Victoria, Australia
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 2,308
 
Hails from Australia
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

Quote:
Originally Posted by d-archer
I think you have all offered very interesting and helpful insight. I have been having trouble forgiving this particular person who hurt me. Believe me, I have tried. I know that the forgiving is for me and not for him, but it's still hard. I try to say to myself, "I forgive this man. He must have a lot of internal issues to treat others this way.", but at the same time I think to myself, "That dirty rat #$%!!" I suppose this will dissipate over time.

Bravo you have provided your own solution....forgive yourself for saying and knowing he is a 'dirty rat@#$#' because (a)You would be justified in saying it and (b) you would get the monkey off your back which you have allowed to control your life. Also, if you have tried to forgive him then you HAVE forgiven him since it is your intention to do so. If your heart does not follow suit it makes your forgiveness more sublime.
__________________
Can never learn enough.....
Reply With Quote
  #56   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 08:06 AM
RobinZ's Avatar
RobinZ RobinZ is online now
A WC! Legend
Almost Philadelphia
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 15,824
 
Hails from United States
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

Perhaps your inability to move past this despite your selling all of your paintings, getting lawyers after him, time passing, talking about it, etc. has more to do with forgiving yourself than him.

You allowed yourself to become so dependent on a stranger on the internet's opinion that you still give him the power to affect your self-image and growth.

Give yourself a break, will ya? He is only in your thoughts because you invite him in. Close the door and move on.
__________________
Robin
My Custom Portraits
Reply With Quote
  #57   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 08:26 AM
RobinZ's Avatar
RobinZ RobinZ is online now
A WC! Legend
Almost Philadelphia
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 15,824
 
Hails from United States
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

We have a great place for debate here at WetCanvas, so I started a thread copying and pasting from our derailment into the general topic of forgiveness: http://www.wetcanvas.com/forums/show...2#post16199422
__________________
Robin
My Custom Portraits
Reply With Quote
  #58   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 10:13 AM
Ma_Jiesi's Avatar
Ma_Jiesi Ma_Jiesi is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 269
 
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

I am very sorry to hear about that. The only thing I can think of is to rise above. Just continue to network, and I know it may seem hard and maybe even weird to say but laugh about it. Make it seem like your untouchable. Here is someone who is trying to drag others down to bring himself up which is sad but its good in a way to know that your good enough for someone to try and bring you down. You just have to show how strong you are. If you want, I'm on twitter, I can follow and retweet you, as well as a few other things http://fineartamerica.com/profiles/1...ca-morgan.html http://twitter.com/#!/MaJiesi
Reply With Quote
  #59   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 06:53 PM
d-archer d-archer is offline
New Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 28
 
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

You are all terrific. Thanks so much to all of you for your intelligent and supportive posts. Ma Jiesi, I'm not on Twitter (yet), but thanks for your post. I must say, I am feeling a lot more at ease about my bad experience after venting about this issue on wetcanvas and hearing from you all.

I was going to post on the new thread that RobinZ started in Debates about Forgiveness, but I get an error message saying that I don't have privileges there. What is that all about? Do I need to change some setting on my account?

Just picked up "Coaching the Artist Within" and the audiobook "The Artist's Way" from the library!
Reply With Quote
  #60   Report Bad Post  
Old 04-16-2012, 07:37 PM
birdhs's Avatar
birdhs birdhs is offline
WC! Guide
Chattanooga, TN
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 17,924
 
Hails from United States
Re: Horrible "artist" mentor badly affected my career

Nothing cuts a problem in half as quickly as sharing it with others. You may learn you are not the only one who has been in the situation, and you may hear a solution that had never occurred to you.

By sharing about this situation, you may help someone else without even realizing it....and you are helping to heal the emotional wounds.

Some of my greatest personal growth came about because of great pain. I found I could survive it and then help others who had also been hurt.

'forgive them Father, for they know not what they do,,,'
__________________
Click here for>> WC FAQS <<for New Members
- Link to Birdhs' Illustrated Books, galleries, and articles http://campsawduststudios.com
Reply With Quote

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:39 AM.


© 2014 F+W All rights reserved.