Shelter-revised

[christylynneharris]

MY IMAGE(S):



GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Shelter
Year Created:
Medium: Acrylic
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 20/20
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
This piece is about the vulnerability of abused women.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
Please give comments on the color in this piece or any other suggestions:)

[Margaretta]

There's a nice, circular movement going on here.

She is probably wearing a long nightdress but it does look rather like an evening dress. She hasn't been visibly damaged so it would be difficult to know that she was any more than emotionally distressed but that is perhaps what you have intended?
I'm not sure that you would see as much breast with the spine going in that direction.

Vulnerability....maybe her hair has been pulled? A bit more dishevellment may indicate that.

This picture is an inspiring idea.

Is this towards a larger, composite picture? There are many poses for vulnerability and abuse which would create further interest. A good subject to pursue.

[Debzy]

Hi! The colours are very dark, but then the subject of abused women is a dark matter so I think it works. It is simple, yet makes a statement. I think it is well done. =)) Debs.

[tgsloth]

I think you've got a powerful idea going here and just suggest a little more work. The background is splotchy. If you fill it in to darken it and make it more solid, the figure will stand out more and gain more focus. I don't mean you should make it completely solid, just more filled in. The background color is burnt umber. If you push it towards ultramarine, you'll achieve better contrast with the orangeish hair and I think this would be good also. Finally, the bright forms of the hands are the center of interest. I would therefore moderate if not eliminate the more horizontal bright which seems to indicate the side of her face. It's rather the wrong shape and it, in any case, should not be nearly and bright as the hands.

If you continue to work this painting, I hope you let us see it again.

[christylynneharris]

Thanks all for the suggestions. Making an ultramarine backround might be a good idea to achieve some contrast and create a mood. I also agree that the shape of the face is wrong, I need to work on that. Margarita, I may take your suggestion and dishevel her hair a bit. I was trying to convey her emotional state. I think it would be cool to create a series of paintings that lifts the character out of her broken state and impowers her.

[Margaretta]

Or to do the different poses from total devastation to restoration of spirit on one canvas! That would be eye-catching.
Women are good at that (recovering) which is why there are more male tramps! Ouch!!

[christylynneharris]

Good idea! Women are resilient I'll repost when I make some changes

[eyecandy2]

Let me take a more critical approach to your painting than all of those above who were trying to be helpful and kind. I think that you can do much better if you would be willing to accept the challenge of painting the figure. Instead of hiding the face with the hair, you might show the face and portray the emotion there. You might spend a little more time on the attire instead of just rushing it through as if you just wanted to get it overwith. If you want to portray her dispair with the background that you have chose, Don't be wishy washy about it. Make it dark and deep so that she pops forward from it. I hope that I haven't been too harsh, but good paintings take time and effort.

[christylynneharris]

Thanks for the constructive criticism. I agree that the piece needs more attention. I was going for a spare approach. I covered the face not to avoid painting it but to convey the subject's desire to be invisible. I will spend more time with the color. I was not trying to attempt realism but more to trying to capture the woman's condition. thanks for taking the time to view it

[dgford]

This may be too blunt. But I don't think you have come to terns at all with your intention.
Vulnerability and abuse is starkly real --- for women and men and children. So, in my opinion, that reality should be pre-eminent in any portrayal. In all components here you have, I believe, failed to come to grips with what is needed.
The hair -- why so much? and falling smoothly?
The backless evening gown --- why so hurriedly painted and so shapeless? Does it symbolise something important to the intention>? If so --- What?
The backgound --- is lost and contributes very little to the aim of the paintiing.
Suggestions ? Use good drawing as the real basis to get over your message. Decide what is needed to depict (a) abuse and (b) vulnerability.
Should the attitude of the body be more expressive? What are the attitudes that can convey such emotional qualities? Will some colours be more effective than others? Will tonal distribution be very important?

I think your intention is wonderful. It is too good to be not treated with great respect and discipline. Think very deeply about the components for the picture. Talk about it with your friends to find what they consider to be vital elements to be portrayed. You are on to a winner here. I wish I had thought of it!
Please go ahead with a new version. And forgive me if you think I have been too blunt.
Geoff

[christylynneharris]

Thanks so much for your honesty. I agree that the painting needs improvement. I am very aware of the stark reality of domestic violence. As I am a survivor myself and spend many hours volunteering with these women and children. Regarding the painting, i was using an experimental technique with texture (first try). I was attempting a simpler approach, as my work is normally very detailed. I will go back and make improvements and post results. Thanks so much for your suggestions, I sure they will be helpful

[greensyster]

Yes very true - going from details to broad strokes can only be done one way. Are you ready?

Get a 1 or 1.5 inch wide long handled brush.

Decide on how many strokes you need to make the image.

Promise yourself you will never ever go over a stroke once you have laid it down.

Then go for it! Works.

[christylynneharris]

I'll try it, Thanks

[christylynneharris]

MY IMAGE(S):





GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Shelter- REVISED
Year Created:
Medium: Acrylic
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 20/20
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
After many honest and appreciated comments, I revamped this painting. Please be honest but gentle :)

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
How are the adjustments? Comments and suggestions:)