WIP, perspective?

[dhesse]

Hello all
I posted this in Animals and wildlife and thought I would also get imput from the experts here as well. All I have for reference is wallet size family photo for the men's faces and a very old, faded pic of the deer. The task is to create a realisitic hunting scene.

Is the placement of the guys accurate? Sorry for the crude sketches. The more I render this, the more I question the composition as a whole.

Any and all feedback welcomed!

Thanks

[Alan Cross]

Both the comp and perspective look good to me....lets see more@!
Alan :)

[dhesse]

Thanks Alan

This is as far as I think I am going to go unless there are obvious changes necessary. I did this for play/practice because I am not very good at landscape type drawings. Lots of things I will change next time!!

[Alan Cross]

Well you did a great job.....my only nit is that one tree on the right....seems out of place....I would crop it. Half in and half out means you wern't sure so my vote is out.
Alan :)

[arlene]

I agree with Alan and I also think the background is unfinished looking.

[DuhVinci]

you could add some texture to the closest trees. A little at a time, and stop before it becomes enough to draw the attention from the main characters. Keep the lack of texture in the trees farther back as an indication of distance.

[harriet]

Hi D,

Just wanted to give yet another opinion... I think the perspective on the hunters is great. The look of excitement is right "on target" so to speak,,lol.
I did notice something...Coming from prime white-tail territory in PA, I've seen a lot of deer, many times bounding across the road right in front of me! From what I've seen, deer tend to jump by bringing their legs up high, like a dog or horse would do. The deer in your sketch looks as though he is bringing his legs up and IN together, almost giving it a knock-knee look. It just doesn't look like the natural leg position, in my opinion.
Looks like it's going to be a great piece though... Something my hubby would LOVE! Good luck with it.

harriet

[dhesse]

Thanks arlene, DuhVinci, and harriet! I really appreciate the feedback. I did add some detail to the background trees, the ones closest to the hunters. I also fixed the hunter's face on the right and quit. I had to start on a commission portrait (5 kids and a dog) which I had to piece together from 6 different photos.

All in all, I learned a lot about perspective and angles from this!

[Paden]

I think the depth perspective on the first is much better.

The second looks off to me. The guys seem too close for their size. This could possibly be fixed by adding a second fallen log behind the one in the foreground and in front of the guys. As it is now, there is nothing in the pic that says the guys are farther away except for their small size.

If the guys are moved farther back it looks like they should be physically higher in the drawing, as if they were up the hill a little ways. Possibly the best way to get the distance would be to move them up the hill slightly, kneeling behind a log or bush or boulder. Something like that should give a much greater feeling of distance.

Steve

[Keith Russell]

Greetings:

I've hesitated to comment on this piece, because it is drawn so well.

But I think the composition is flawed.

The first time I saw it, the deer looks like it's huge, and I thought it was behind the hunters, and about to jump onto them--maybe for killing its mate or something.

I think the deer should be at the far right of the image, as if it's jumping out of the frame. (I know, this isn't 'following the rules', but I think--given this subject--it makes perfect sense.)

The right hand-hunter (aiming his rifle) could be reversed, and it would look more like the deer was fleeing, rather than jumping toward the hunters.

The left-hand hunter bothers me. He isn't looking at the deer, and he isn't looking at his friend. He's 'posing' with his rifle, as if for a camera. He breaks the mood of the piece for me, since he isn't engaged in the scene at all.

Lastly, I'm bothered slightly by the 'framing' effect that the far right-hand tree trunk has. It only adds to the staginess I feel when I look at this.

I know that making the changes I've suggested would involve re-doing the image, and one might not wish to do that, even if one agreed with me that such changes would improve the image.

And, one might not agree.

(But I wanted to share my opinion, for what it's worth...)

Keith.

[dhesse]

Thanks Paden and Keith. I am very grateful that you took the time to critique this. I agree with all you said Keith. Originally I had the deer jumping to the right of the page and the hunters were to the left. The ref. pic of the guys I got didn't work with that positioning, even if I reversed it. So I went with this.

This was the most challanging piece I have ever done because I have never drawn a deer before and I hate guns! I am trying to build my skill at taking different images and piece them together to create a "realistic scene". I think the most important thing I have learned is to stick with the first, it's always the best!

Thanks again!