View Full Version : Critique please

Phyllis Rennie
04-05-2000, 08:19 PM
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/User/Lauras doiley.JPG
Almost (I think) finished with this one. Any suggestions for improving it will be appreciated. My biggest challenge was making the white objects look white without "jumping off" the canvas. It is oil, 18" x 24". I've worked on it to the point where I can't see it clearly so am hoping you can offer fresh insight. Phyl.

Oh bother!!! Somebody please help me with this computer!!!

[This message has been edited by Phyllis Rennie (edited April 05, 2000).]

04-05-2000, 08:33 PM

[This message has been edited by cagathoc (edited April 05, 2000).]

04-06-2000, 04:27 AM
i think that overall the piece looks hazy. your composition is very well placed, but the generalities of the color makes it difficult to look at.

the whites don't jump off the canvas, you've achieved your goal.

the doiley is off perspective in comparison to the rest of your painting.


i darkened, sharpened and put more contrast on your image to show you the difference, but now you can really see how the doiley is out of relation with the rest of the piece.

what is the still life sitting on? there needs to be some definition to anchor the items.

04-06-2000, 10:30 AM
Phyllis..I llike what Michelle has suggested here..makes the composition stronger and the images pop. the colors are good and cohesive..post the finished piece for us to see.

04-07-2000, 04:53 AM

i'm KERI... kemenshi is michele..

it's been noted lately that many have called me kem.. that's ok, so long as the difference is noted http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif

kayemme is phonetic for k.m., or k. marion or even better.. keri marion which, amazingly, happens to be my name. http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif

km (http://www.artistnation.com/members/lofts/kmarion/)

04-07-2000, 08:48 AM
KM -

Now you know how it feels - LOL!

(remember how long you called me Cathy?) http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/wink.gif


04-07-2000, 09:20 AM
Hi - I just cropped the image (removed all that white around the painting) and reposted it. Could not read the text well - everything went ofscreen.

04-07-2000, 10:03 AM
http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/eek.gif Sorry Keri..foot in mouth time! people are always getting me and Sandi mixed up too! Mea culpa in the name department!

04-07-2000, 04:17 PM
Originally posted by sandyartist:
http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/eek.gif Sorry Keri..foot in mouth time! people are always getting me and Sandi mixed up too! Mea culpa in the name department!

LOL! i think I'VE even called you sandi...

oh jeez.. anyhow.. it doesn't make me mad.. just want to clear it up http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif and YES *cindy* i remember calling you cathy MANY TIMES..


in fact.. i just realized i spelled michele's online name wrong, but you know who i mean.. ahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

km (http://www.artistnation.com/members/lofts/kmarion/)

[This message has been edited by kayemme (edited April 07, 2000).]

Phyllis Rennie
04-07-2000, 08:00 PM
Thanks for the help with posting. Looks like scanning & sending chewed it up quite a bit......it's not really that foggy. The still life is sitting on a small table, below eye level. Not sure what the problem is with the perspective. Phyl

04-07-2000, 08:36 PM
When someone make a critique in this forum I think he has to have in mind this:
1. The Painter's skills with the brushes, pastels or whatever...
2. The painter skills with his IMAGE EDITING SOFTWARE...

There is no need to bee an Photoshop wizard
to see that most of the people posts their images without any retouch. Scanners and even the "amazing" digital cammeras don't make the deal properly. Usualy the cammeras can't deal good with pale tones and grays. But in the most of cases people just need to do a little "gamma correction" (= light exposure)with an image editor. And there is no need to use huge, expensive and sofisticated softs like Photoshop or so; or take lessons to do it. There is a lot of FREEware in the web that you can download, free, friendly and tinny (usually 1 or 2 Mb).
"Irfan view"; "GIMP"; "20/20"; "Color Pilot"(this make wonderfuls with a single click); etc... etc....
Phyllis i'm affraid to make the fool but this is your image edited with some Gamma correction and a little of Sharpen filter.
This is the way I guess your painting is in reality.
If I did worst... I shut my mouth and retire all I said before.

[This message has been edited by william (edited April 07, 2000).]

04-08-2000, 03:17 AM
the perspective is off in your elipses of the doiley and the mouth of the vase.

on the vase you have a very small oval.. narrow. it suggests we see the vase mostly from the side and above just a bit.

the doiley, on the other hand, is almost an open circle, which suggests we are viewing it almost entirely above..

these two elipses should be equal to suggest we are looking at two things on the same plane of existence (that is, of course, if that's what you're striving for, which i assume you are).

so pick one and go with it. i hope that helps http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif

km (http://www.artistnation.com/members/lofts/kmarion/)

04-08-2000, 05:54 AM
llis,,,,just how accurate is the image post, or which one is the closest?......milt

04-08-2000, 09:17 AM
Bruin: As much as I would like to claim this painting as mine, I will have to tell you that this one belongs to Phyllis Rennie. She lives in PA and I live in GA. It is confusing. http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif and sometimes quite amusing, Phyllis and I laugh about it all the time. I just tell her to be careful and don't go into any bars and do anything foolish....lol I will do my best to try to remember to always post my paintings and messges using "llis" to keep things from getting weird. "Hugs" and hope you are getting a lot done on your paintings. We miss you in Chat! See ya soon.

04-08-2000, 02:26 PM
well then,,,i think i'll continue to mix you two up jsut to confuse you.....milt

04-09-2000, 10:50 AM

04-09-2000, 05:21 PM
Oh, dear, Phyllis..now the mixup clarification is mixedup!! I am jus'the garden variety Sandy (not Sandra either..m' Dad was a redhead and I got stuck with his nickname!) there is also a Sandi..with the creative spelling, but that is not moi..FYI///lol!! Sandy Perrine, aka sandyartist

04-09-2000, 09:45 PM
Sandyartist, maybe this will help. Phyllis was trying to tell everyone that .....

Kayemme--is not--Kemshimi
Cathy--is not --Cindy
Sandyartist--is not --Sandi (aka Calif Sandi)
llis-- is not --Phyl

There are a couple of others that get mixed up as well, but we won't go there now. http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif amd I won't even begin to tell all the names that Figgby gets called. http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif

BTW: Check your e mail. You have a message from llis about your web page. lol that's me.

Phyllis Rennie
04-10-2000, 12:29 AM
I guess if we can't dazzle 'em, we can always baffle 'em!!!!!!

Kaym.-- I was wondering if that's what you meant. Thanks for clarifying. Since I was standing about 3-4' away and the table is only 30" high, I suspect it's the vase that's off. It was full of petunias at the time and I don't remember thinking about the opening. Will go back and set it and the doiley again and check it. Thanks.

William--thanks for the help. I'm not too good with computing so I'd never think you to be foolish for assisting.

Milt--the one William did is better, less foggy, but it looses a lot of contrast-especially in the fruit. The grapes don't blend into the table that much and the hilights are brighter.

To finish: there were a couple of grapes added near the end (to break up a straight line) and they still need a shadow. The table line in the background is not straight. And as KM pointed out --the perspective issue. Anybody see anything else??? Phyl.

Phyllis Rennie
04-10-2000, 12:32 AM
Llis, No need to worry about the bars--my addictions all start with "C". Chocolate, cheesecake, and coffee!!! Phyl