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dzspag
03-17-2000, 07:51 PM
24"x36"
Watersoluable Oil on Canvas

Here is another attempt at oil..I may have overdone this one a weeeeee bit! I really did see this sky one night..but not here..so I had to guess. Does the sky or water need to be simplified some? Is it dramatic or distracting. I sure do appreciate all the comments in this critique center...they are invaluable!

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/User/sunst.jpg

Phyllis Franklin
03-17-2000, 08:37 PM
I like the way you have handled this piece. The only thing that I see that I would change is to make the far tree trunks much darker than they are now. It looks as if to me that all the trunks are the same color from the ones that are the closest to the ones that are far away. I think maybe having them darker would sink them back into the painting more. It truly is not a big deal....I am just trying my best to find something and I can't find anything. http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif I really have enjoyed seeing your work. Now you have to (must) build that web site. http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif

Phyllis Rennie
03-17-2000, 08:48 PM
Well......looks like Llis and I are both here at the same time tonight!!

Now about your painting, It's a bit "firey" for me. I like the water but think the sky and the foreground could both be toned down a little. But I'm sure a lot of people would disagree with me. Phyl.

arlene
03-18-2000, 12:39 AM
i look forward to seeing your work. all is excellent.
the only thing i would do is tone down the yellow in the water just a bit. right now the water and sky are competing with one another in terms of the yellow and orange colors. keep the sky the way it is [i've seen skies like this] i have no problem with the trees or anything else.
www.artdebut.com/arlene.htm (http://www.artdebut.com/arlene.htm)

[This message has been edited by arlene (edited March 18, 2000).]

bruin70
03-18-2000, 04:36 AM
wait a minute....i thought llis rennie and llis franklin were one and the same. which is the evil twin? dz,,,i would change the scoop effect you created with the foreground brush. it is an unconscious need to "frame" your area of interest, but creates a bullseye composition instead. at least, try to eliminate the symmetry of it. see also, how you duplicated the same scoop with the trees...milt

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"he who thinks he know all and knows nothing is king in a kingdom of one,,,,,or a critic" - the kobe

Phyllis Franklin
03-18-2000, 02:57 PM
Bruin: Phyllis Rennie is my friend. You see we have the same first name. And to compound that fact ...my maiden name begins with an "R". So...I am Phyllis R. Franklin.

Phyllis Rennie signs most of her post as Phyl. I sign most of mine as llis, and a lot of my friends call me llis (liz). I also sign most of my paintings "llis" .

To further clairfy ...Phyllis Rennie is the one with the knowledge that enables her to give critiques. I on the other hand I just have to say I like it or I don't. I am trying to learn to see things they way that y'all do, but I have a long way to go. Hope this helps.

llis

henrik
03-18-2000, 05:48 PM
Wonderful - the sky is breathtaking!

I think the water needs to be darkened; now the reflection is almost brighter than the sky (which of cource is impossible). I took the liberty of manipulating this picture to show this, and I also moved some of the foreground grass to reduce the circular effect. I darkened some of the darks. I think focus now moved to the setting sun.

(The editing introduced some unintentional artefacts - please look at composition and values)

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/User/sunst-hl1.jpg

Phyllis Rennie
03-18-2000, 07:58 PM
Originally posted by Phyllis Franklin:
Bruin:

To further clairfy ...Phyllis Rennie is the one with the knowledge that enables her to give critiques.

llis

Llis, How kind of you to make that statement. I'm not really sure that I'm knowledgable enough to be of any help to anyone--we're all still learning.

gordon
03-19-2000, 11:54 AM
[Love it,would not change a thing.
I have seen many a scene like this here in England.

paintfool
03-19-2000, 01:21 PM
i like this a lot. My eyes, however were drawn to the water almost to the point where it became difficult to focus on your beautiful rendition of the sunset, after Henriks alterations (darkening of the water) i was much better able to see the sky.This is a beautiful painting!! We have a lot of that type of cloud formation & those beautiful sunsets here in Florida.....Cheryl