PDA

View Full Version : birds


KIWI
02-23-2000, 08:07 PM
Hi, I am 16 in my first year of Art in high school. I would love to get some feedback on these pastels I did recently. Thanks, Kelly
ps. look here Rod!
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/User/kasbirds.jpg

[This message has been edited by KIWI (edited March 09, 2000).]

Electra
02-23-2000, 08:31 PM
Kiwi,

Wow, this is your first year? You did VERY well!

The owl flying down the road is a very cool effect! Everything looks very nice (and good attention to lighting and detail, by the way!!), but I do have a few suggestions for you:

When you paint a moon, remember that it is white, and not yellow (unless you were going for the mysterious effect it gives your painting :-) )

You might think about darkening the clouds just a tad -- clouds at night are darker gray. You can fix it easily by softening the edges and shading it slowly until you reach the right color. You be the judge!

I am not sure if it's the photo or not, but you might also consider darkening the owl a little bit, since the light from the moon would be hitting it from the back.

The seagulls: What a beautiful job you have done here! I love the way you captured their motion and energy and togetherness. The sky is a perfect backdrop for the scene. Just a few minor suggestions here, but it's hard to find much wrong with this one!

You might consider doing more shading of the pier stumps.. they look a tad on the flat side. Consider where your light source is - the setting sun -- and shade them appropriately using that as your direction.

Also -- the setting sun has all of the colors you used -- except green. If you were going for the rainbow look, you did it very well, and it looks really pretty as a backdrop for the gulls. If you were going for a realistic sky, you might want to make the green a bit bluer and blend the blue directly into the yellow.. Also at the top of the painting ... blend in a bit of violet for the night sky.

All in all, I am very impressed. You are doing a fabulous job. Your teacher must be very proud of you. Keep it up!

Looking forward to seeing more of your work!



------------------
Electra
---
Life is less about who you are, and more about who you choose to be.

henrik
02-24-2000, 06:41 PM
I really like the owl painting - it has that mystic quality that I like a lot. It reminds me of my favourite painter Magritte. Have you seen any of his work?

irene clark
02-24-2000, 07:02 PM
Hi Kelly,
Beautiful paintings. Love that sunset and playful nature of the birds is well portrayed.
Love the way that lovely owl swoops right towards us along that very long treelined lane.
Well done and keep on stroking.
sincerely
Irene Clark with a heart for art

CrowsNest
02-25-2000, 12:49 AM
Very nice! Maybe while you are adding more shading to the pier stumps you could shorten the next to last one from the back. I think it would improve the perspective of the stumps getting smaller as they go back.
Your one point perspective of the owl is great! I do agree with Electra though with the added rendering of the owl since it is the main focus of the piece. Great Job!!

Rod
02-25-2000, 03:49 AM
Hi Kelly,
Two great pastels,
I like the captured movement of the birds,their majestic interwoven flight. background colors blend in nicely. Only change I would make are the posts, just correct the perspective a tad. Hold a straight line across the top of posts and you will see the third one back needs shortening.
The owl looks as he is about to fly right out of your painting, nice effect.
Keep up the great work , http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/cool.gif
Rod.

Rod
02-25-2000, 03:58 PM
Forgot to say,
You make sure you post some more, we all want to see your next, Happy Painting.

KIWI
02-25-2000, 05:42 PM
Thank you for your kind words. I was going to just leave this just like they were until I got to thinking about the things you told me. With just little work I can have these pastels looking a little more finished. My art teacher is encouraging me to keep every one of my drawings for a portfolio. I will have a nice pencil drawing to show you guys after it is graded. thanks again, Kelly http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif

Electra
02-25-2000, 06:14 PM
Good for you Kelly. Don't let criticism discourage you - let it encourage you. If you don't like some of the suggestions, don't use them, but think about them and the reasons they might have been mentioned.

I think you're very talented and are developing some skills that will carry you far. And please, do submit more of your work. I'm eager to see it!

Bruce Rohrlach
02-26-2000, 04:16 AM
Howdy Kelly,

Wow - your doing great. I agree the birds (seagulls) are excellent. Love the way your've mixed their positions and angles to convey their rapid twisting "movement". Your've really done that particularly well.

And the owl is the real centre-piece of your other pastel. Looking forward to seeing your drawing/sketch !

Keep drawing!

oleCC
02-26-2000, 05:06 PM
Hi Kiwi....My hats off to you - not only for the lovely artwork, but also for being open to constructive critisicm. Learning never really ends - as long as the willingness is
there. Post some more soon !

------------------