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robinsn
01-14-2000, 11:01 PM
As I am putting the final touches on this piece (like the whiskers, which aren't there yet), I was hoping to get some feedback to help finish it off.

http://www.artistnation.com/members/paris/randy/images/art/lioness.jpg

All feedback is appreciated!

Thanks,


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-Randy


[This message has been edited by robinsn (edited January 15, 2000).]

irene clark
01-15-2000, 07:29 PM
Hi Robinsn
Upon viewing, the first thing that came to my mind was MAGNIFICENT!!
You've really caught the majesty of this beautiful creature.
I too love to create in the dark. The shadows across her face add to the mystery of this truly wonderful portrait.
I draw mostly wildlife and for the life of me I can't see that adding anything, except whiskers and maybe a twinkle in the eye(s)could enhance what you've already captured. Bravo!
Keep on stroking
Irene Clark with a heart for art

Phyllis Franklin
01-15-2000, 07:35 PM
Randy: I think this is a keeper!!!!

I agree with Irene, put a twinkle in the eyes, and maybe a highlight on the nose kinda like moisture. With or without the whiskers, she is beautiful.

Rod
01-15-2000, 08:19 PM
Brilliant Randy, lovely play of light across a wonderful beast,I agree a twinkle in the eye would complete the mystery captured,
Rod

Sandi
01-15-2000, 08:57 PM
Awesome, Randy! I agree, with the rest, about the twinkles and whiskers. Great job!! I want to reach out and hug and squeeze her and pet her soft fur and strong muscles. She's beautiful! So solid! Yet soft.

Gisela
01-15-2000, 09:27 PM
Randy,
I think this piece is magnificent. you captured the animal beautifully, but what i like best is the play of light and shadows. The painting is warm and inviting even though the cat is pwerful and dangerous.
Lovely!
Gisela

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bruin70
01-16-2000, 05:13 AM
sandi,,,please do not pet the animals. they will bite your head off....
randy,,,you should raise the back of the lioness a bit, especially as it nears the head, so that the head and body are more connected.
the shadow across the lioness is a bit too ,,,,,even. they look a bit like stripes. i would vary the shadow edges a bit to give the impression of tree leaves casting the shadow. it appears that the nose/mouth area is in shadow, while it's right (our left) side of the upper mouth is being hit with light??? the shadow there is heavily outlined in dark and there is not enough side mouth in light, so the whole mouth area looks a tad chopped off on the left. if you show a little more of the lit mouth, and probably when you complete the whiskers, the mouth area will look fuller.

when light hits an object, especially light that breaks thru shadows,ie,,,a shaft of light beaming thru curtains and hitting the floor or, like you have,,,light that breaks thru shaded trees and hitting an object,,,,,,think that the light HITS the object,,,SMACKS IT. it doesn't EMBRACE it. the phrase that light "HITS THE FLOOR" is very descriptive,,,and right. so it's very harsh. you've softened and blended the light. so it's almost like the striped pattern of a tiger. i understand why...the fur is soft and the light is burred by all that hair. but just here or there make a tiny clean edged statement with the light. you did it here and there. a shot of light hitting the right ear, the white light on the fur and paw, the bottom lid of the right eye, a few hairs hit on the left ear,,,,especially the one hair just below the ear. see how effective that bit of emphasis is against the dark. a few more well placed and sharper hits could do nicely.....milt

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"he who thinks he know all and knows nothing is king in a kingdom of one,,,,,or a critic" - the kobe

bruin70
01-16-2000, 05:22 AM
i just noticed the rock atop which the lioness rests.it's vague. here is a good opportunity to show those harder light patterns. then,,,it will show the rock better,,,give more sense of light breaking thru trees,,,and may make it unnecessary to hassle with the light pattern on the lioness. do the rock first,,,it may be all you need. ps, be careful with the light you put on the rock. it should not compete with the light on the lioness....milt

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"he who thinks he know all and knows nothing is king in a kingdom of one,,,,,or a critic" - the kobe

robinsn
01-16-2000, 01:33 PM
Thanks for the great comments, all! I actually visited this lioness and got to know her and took photos. Maybe this makes more difference than I had thought, as opposed to just painting from photos. I developed an affinity for her at the zoo, and perhaps subconciously, this comes through in painting her? I originally went there just to get photos so I wouldn't be plagerizing other's photos, but may have gotten more than I bargained for. Do you have any experiences like this?

Irene, I'd like to see some of your wildlife. Where can I see some?

The twinkle in the eye sounds good as well as on the nose. I hope I can get it right. I tried putting color in the left eye originally, but it looked like she had cataracts. A twinkle will probably work much better.

Milt,

Interesting that you mention the back needing to be raised. I actually raised it more than in the reference photos, thinking the same thing, but compromised, not going as high as I thought it ought to, but higher than in reality...
I assume when you say the stripes are too even, you're talking about on the body, not the head? I might stick another small shadow there.
Your comment on the light 'smacking' objects is good. I don't think I'll change it on the lioness, but hitting the rock with some sounds like a good idea. I might try that.



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-Randy

irene clark
01-16-2000, 08:09 PM
Hi Robinsn,
I'm so pleased you want to visit my website. Enjoy!
<a href="http://www.finearts.yorku.ca/kclark/hart/">Heart to H-ART - Irene Clark</a>
[QUOTE]Originally posted by robinsn:
[B
Irene, I'd like to see some of your wildlife. Where can I see some?

robinsn
01-22-2000, 06:29 PM
Nice site! I like your oil pieces especially - those cactus pieces are especially cool. They have that same play of lightness and darkness that I like to put in my works too.

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-Randy

Bruce Rohrlach
01-23-2000, 12:19 AM
Fantastic Randy !!!

Really nice -the painting has real presence - like it demands to be looked at! I actually like the eyes black or at least very dark brown (rather than a twinkle) - adds to the sence of "unpredictability" in the beast. (Back definetly needs to be higher).

Am also inspired by your "space" painting on your gallery-page : I may try something similiar oneday soon -

robinsn
01-24-2000, 12:13 AM
Bruce, thanks for you comments, especially about the eyes! Although the concensus seems to be they need a twinkle, I will experiment to see what I like best.

That space painting was a LOT of fun to do. I've been thinking of doing more like that myself. But I'm trying different things - still trying to find my direction in art. Wildlife? Landscape? Portrait? Space? I dunno....

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-Randy
http://www.artistnation.com/members/paris/randy/

robinsn
02-02-2000, 06:58 PM
I've added the eye highlights and whiskers, and sometimes I think the eyes now look wrong and sometimes I think they look good. I only added a hint of whiskers. What do you think?

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/User/lioness1.jpg

Unfortunately, all the detail doesn't show in the scan. In the left eye (our left), there is a very slight gold highlight opposite the dim white highlight. The right eye has bright white highlight, and that eye is totally black in the reference photo.


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-Randy
http://www.artistnation.com/members/paris/randy/


[This message has been edited by robinsn (edited February 02, 2000).]

Phyllis Rennie
02-02-2000, 08:09 PM
She is beautiful! About making the back higher--how about leaving it black and adding some light to the background above it? Read with interest the comments about light smacking objects. Never thought of it that way--have explored light which bounces off objects. Sort of a halo effect in the air around something seems to work for me--don't know about doing that with fur though. Light also goes around things and that's why I think a bit lighter background above the back might work.

henrik
02-03-2000, 03:14 AM
Hi, I think the twinkle on the lioness right eye is ok, but the other is a bit too pronounced. To me it looks like the light could not hit the eye with such force considering the rest of the lightning.
The lioness left eye also looks a bit dead - if the light hits that hard, it must come out at the bottom of the eye - now the eye has a tendency to look like it is made of black marble.
However, if you add light to the bottom of the eye to make it look more alive, the eye will probably be way to light.

Why not try to just take the twinkle down in value?

The Whiskers are perfect.


[This message has been edited by henrik (edited February 03, 2000).]

llis
02-03-2000, 06:46 AM
Randy, she is beautiful!

Patti
02-03-2000, 09:46 AM
Randy, I think you have done an amazing job on this painting. I usually don't go crazy for wildlife subjects but this is really very beautiful. I like the way you have captured the translucent quality on the ear especially. Very well done.

Pat

Bruce Rohrlach
02-03-2000, 05:40 PM
Really Great Randy!! Straight to the framer ! and then YOUR living room wall.

robinsn
02-09-2000, 10:38 AM
Thank you all for all of your comments! I've finalized the lioness and incorporated some of the suggestions and so am posting the result. It's a photograph rather than a scan and the colors didn't translate as well.

There are slight twinkles in each eye. Her right eye has a hint gold showing.
The sun is 'smacking' the rocks
I looked at raising the back. Actually, what you are seeing is her hind end, not her back. Her actual back and neck is hidden. I decided not to raise it.
The shadows on her hind end bother me some. I tried different shadows and they all looked wrong, so I wiped 'em off and left it this way.

Thanks again for all the comments. It's great to have this forum available. It helps so much!
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/User/lioness2.jpg

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-Randy
http://www.artistnation.com/members/paris/randy/

henrik
02-09-2000, 04:13 PM
YES!
5 x ROOOOAAAARS !

irene clark
02-09-2000, 09:16 PM
Hi there!

You've truly done great justice to this magnificent creature. That's for sure and for certain.
AWESOME!!!

Irene with a heart for art