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DanaLJensen
06-27-2010, 07:24 PM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/06-27-2010/189937_Essence_of_Life.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Father's Shoes
Year Created:
Medium: Oil
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 18x24
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
Still working on developing my skill in composition. What could I have done to make this a better painting??

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
Any C&C is greatly appreciated! :)

thomas w
06-28-2010, 06:39 AM
Very good, nice and crisp. I think it would be better with a horizon line and some sky, IMHO.

Continental
06-28-2010, 09:51 AM
I think that your composition is very good. I don't know what your reference looked like, so I made some changes to take or leave. I extended the beach and added some detail. Then worked some on the water lighting the portion that hits the shore and some at the top. I like the composition and the subject, nice work on this.
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/28-Jun-2010/121174-189937_Essence_of_Life.jpg

Corby
06-28-2010, 12:12 PM
Go Dana! That golden mean is really 'mean'!

tgsloth
06-28-2010, 01:33 PM
The composition is perfect and you've beautifully painted the most difficult part- the figure. I think the weakness is the treatment of the ocean. I know you're trying to blur it and that's good but it comes across to me as a series of blue stripes wherein the blue chroma is too intense. The rocks also don't seem grounded in the sand as they lack shadows. But great skill overall.

DanaLJensen
06-28-2010, 04:23 PM
@ThomasW....thank you, I contemplated a horizon many a time! But chose to stick with the water/reef.

@Continental...thanks for your mock up. The photo probably doesn't show the subtle-ties of the shallow water in the mid ground...but can see how what you've done works as well! Thank you.

@Corby....Woohoo! Those words are music to my ears!!! :) Thank you!

@TG....Thanks for your kind words Bob. I think you're right on the ocean/reef. I repainted it several times, this last one being the most 'successful'. And will relook at those rocks.