Scoville Park

[goldie]

MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/09-14-2002/5747_scoville_park1.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Scoville Park
Year Created: 2002
Medium: Oil
Surface: Linen
Dimension: 20 x 16
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
painted en plein air.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
what do you think? can I do better?

[Christine Mallaband]

Hi overall I like this image, but I am a little concerned with the bandstand. I am not sure which posts are front, and which are back, also the roof is slightly flat, I think possibly more dappled shade, shadow, may solve the problem. I have tried to photoshop it, darkening the right side of the roof, (it is octagonal isnt it?), I think you could do this with a couple of washes so you dont destroy all your tiles,
and also I put a highlight on the lamppost right in front of the bandstand to bring it forward a bit and stop it merging, What do you think?
lol Chris M-B

[henrik]

Christine, I think the light is coming from our right. The deep shadow should be on the other side I think; otherwise it is inconsistent with the light on lampposts, and poles in the gazebo.

Here is an image where added some shadows on the roof (on the other side). Bu also did a few other things.
The path leading into the picture is quite eye catching and feels a bit stiff. The rule of thumb is to have it be open over the corner to make it look inviting. Here I don't know if that is important, but the path creates a strong line and sort of makes the eye go off canvas. I don't think the path is really important, and in the edited image I just madeit more vague, and at the same time managed to get it to surround the corner.

I also think that you could unite colors more; now the upper half is mostly green, and the bottom an explotion of color. This divides the painting in two halfs. A tad more red and yellow in the upper half will help I think. Use this also to make some of the backgound vegetation look less flat.

All in all, a very good-looking piece.

[Christine Mallaband]

Hi I had written you a reply, but I got thrown out again! anyway, yes I agree with you, but my idea was that there were trees on that side casting a dappled shadow, (which is what I meant first of all) by shading the right I was trying to concentrate the focus towards the center of the picture, (the highlight on the lampost is on the correct side I think) yes technically speaking the shadow should be on the left , but I think that tends to cut the picture in half. I like the rest of what you have done,
next time I post to this forum I shall try and be more specific. I know that the structured forums should be as accurate as possible, I was letting my artistic licence get ahead of me!
lol Chris M-B

[henrik]

Don't worry Christine :) The edits looked good, and yes if it is shadows from the trees, then it will work.

[cobalt fingers]

Great that you're outside. You will learn so much out there. The lower 1/3 is really well done and the comp. is good. You will benefit from not treated the mid-ground trees the same (with the same size brushwork. These places will recede better if handled as masses. I cannot believe the flowers are so crisp and textured and then have the same look to the distant stuff. Plein Air doesn't have to be alla prima-it wasn't for Monet. Visit the site several times and reassault the mid-ground.