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tgsloth
04-30-2009, 05:57 PM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/04-30-2009/124239_God_Draws_a_Line.jpg

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/04-30-2009/124239_God_draws_a_straight_line.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: God draws a line
Year Created:
Medium: Oil
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 30x40
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I had done a little (6x9) pastel of this scene and decided to try to blow it up and improve it, now in oil. I've posted both.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
The issue I had in working up the oil was how much I would try to do a smooooothly blended piece instead of trying to leave it somewhat rough. I feel like it's somewhat rough and have broken my brain to figure out if I've<br>Underworked it<br>Overworked it<br>or created a maaaasterpiece

yarddog
05-01-2009, 02:08 AM
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/30-Apr-2009/182771-deadplace.gif where is everybody....probly scared to look.....?

I'm sorry sloth....which is which.....?
......they are both really cool....the first looks more like you.....
............a bit more dramatic and the lightning is so sharp.......

the second one is so different....nice....perhaps more subdued....?
I like them both....but the first one best....which ever that is...whatever that means....hahaha....ydhttp://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/30-Apr-2009/182771-aska.gif
ps:did you find yer way in the doghouse.....?

tgsloth
05-01-2009, 07:23 AM
The first is the oil which is hopefully better (One wouldn't want to see evolution function in reverse) but I think with work like this, critiques could be pretty subjective and some might prefer the small pastel.

bpc
05-01-2009, 10:10 AM
I'd like to see the lightning bolt originate somewhere on the canvas..instead of somewhere off the canvas..which would probably mean that it must terminate back further in the scene to avoid a back to front sloping bolt

allanom
05-01-2009, 11:11 AM
"God draws a line": Who voted you God?!...Oh... I see... the lightning bolt....

The pastel is the superior piece, with it's simple composition, subtle colours and beautiful blends.

I would vote for smoother blending in the oil -- especially in the red/yellow cloud (is it?) structure. And make the flash reflections be at either one end of the bolt or the other -- I think both ends is a little overdone. My choice would be leave it at the water.

MRSBB
05-01-2009, 11:34 AM
Tg, I think the sky is wonderful in the first painting, but the rest of it just reads very unrealistic to me. With the bright sunset over the water, the water would be lighter in color. Sorry, I'll leave it at that as to me it reads more like a forest fire. Keep having fun...........Lenore

Corby
05-01-2009, 01:22 PM
mmmmm...I love the sense of edge, the raw energy of that clean searing lightning bolt in the pastel. It cuts through the waiting serenity of the landscape so beautifully. You could do that exact same thing with the oil. The oil as it is though, seems more like a labor of love.

La_
05-01-2009, 01:43 PM
just a thought rather than a critique ... i saw some really good footage of lightning that showed electricity reaching up from the ground to meet the electricity coming from above - twas very cool and supposedly happens a lot ... who knew ...

la

Spyderbabe
05-01-2009, 03:18 PM
I vote for the pastel.

These great lightening photos (http://northernimages.smugmug.com/gallery/4155479_8iizj/1/519772817_eaUgG#519772817_eaUgG)are from a friend of a friend.

mackb
05-01-2009, 09:26 PM
tg, I hate to do this to ya, but I love the feel of the pastel. If you were trying to improve on it, it didn't work, too rough, it doesn't set the mood.

mooz49
05-02-2009, 04:28 AM
Hi Bob ....I prefer God's fine line in the first one but the second painting (pastel) would be my favourite. If you are on speaking terms with God ask him to swap them! :thumbsup:

greensyster
05-02-2009, 04:43 AM
For me the lightning reflection is too broad - my keen observations from the deck show the narrow streaks to be more like below.

Otherwise - You deliver Bob in oil and pastel!

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/02-May-2009/135872-124239_god_draws_a_line.jpg


.

cbcarnell
05-03-2009, 01:17 AM
I think both of these paintings convey a powerful message, each in their own way. I like the strong colors in the oil version, and prefer the lightening bolt as well, but there is just something about the pastel that makes it my favorite. Maybe the softness of the medium counterbalancing the strength of the lightening bolt?