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Sam_I_Am
04-26-2009, 05:28 PM
MY IMAGE(S):




GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Second Try: Canal
Year Created:
Medium: Acrylic
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 20 x 24
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
Trying this one again. It hasn't been long since the last one, but I've made some significant improvements, so I've started a new thread. New total time spent on it is about 8 hours. Done with knives, and I've gone in and added some brush work detailing on the bridge.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
Here is the previous attempt:
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v292/Sam_I_Am/100_0473.jpg

And the new:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v292/Sam_I_Am/101_0245.jpg

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/04-26-2009/81190_101_0244.JPG
Is there actual improvement ? Thats my main question. If not, I think I'm going to have to just scrap this one.

mooz49
04-27-2009, 04:22 AM
Hi Stef ..... I think it is very difficult to do this painting justice looking at it on the computer screen. It is one of those paintings that needs to be viewed from a distance and it looks really good when standing back a few feet from the computer as I am sure it does in person at that size. Put it out of sight for a few days and come back to look at it again and see how you feel about it then ....Good Luck!

Van Mickley
04-27-2009, 11:46 AM
Hi,
I like the lighter/brighter colors in the new one. The bridge looks much better. Thanks for sharing.

tgsloth
04-27-2009, 03:19 PM
Scrap it? Nuh-uh. I'll come and throw eggs at your studio.

The bridge treatment is magnificent. Great colors. And yes, it's better. I strongly feel what's holding the painting back are all those fussy windows. Who needs 'em? The bridge is the star of the show. Plus you've done them as repetitive vertical swipes. Actual windows have width and diversity. But who needs 'em. We don't need no stinking' windows!

So I'd paint them out. Maybe suggest a few. The houses can be just forms. Then darken and simplify the foliage at the lower right. Its yellow highligh is DISTRACTING FROM MY BELOVED BRIDGE. And graciously pick up your prize at the next art show.

Sam_I_Am
04-27-2009, 11:17 PM
Thanks for your response, guys. I feel relieved that I'm at least moving in a forward direction with this one. I agree with your comments, Bob - I think I'll do one more rework on this one before I call it quits. It is growing on me, though. I hung it up in my hallway so that I'm forced to think about it everytime I leave my bathroom :P

bpc
04-28-2009, 11:15 AM
Love the vibrancy and color here..but for me that bridge doesn't seem to reach the other shore..I can't feel any connectivity between the right end of the bridge and the canal bank

Corby
04-28-2009, 11:35 AM
I agree with tgsloth, the polka dotty windows are not helpful, they steal the show but really have nothing in themselves to offer. As windows they are distracting because there are perspective issues. If the buildings were bulked up with light and shadow and the windows just hinted at and given interest as unified elements instead of polka dots I think the painting would work very well! Also that bridge could be brought forward and given more specific shape and color...just some thoughts that may be of help.


http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/28-Apr-2009/70790-buildings.jpg

Sam_I_Am
04-28-2009, 01:19 PM
Thanks for the suggestions, guys.

I definitely agree with your ideas, Corby. I'd planned on working on this some more tonight. I'll post my changes.