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Linee
04-01-2008, 07:39 PM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/04-01-2008/101851_Mine_Car_007.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Mine Car
Year Created: 2008
Medium: Acrylic
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 16 x 20
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I painted this from a photo taken from the local Iron Industry Museum.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
I just want some objective views.

laudesan
04-01-2008, 07:50 PM
Linda you painted this beautifully. Your foliage is exceptionally well painted. I really like the light areas glowing through the branches on the tree on the right.

The car is exceptional too. Only thing I would have done, is made those tracks go somewhere. I would have made the car look like a working car, rather than an antique on static tracks.

Cheers JJ

zoropb
04-01-2008, 07:51 PM
Nicely Done.

Sergio

kathrynlovespets
04-01-2008, 08:37 PM
the trees and light are painted so beautifully
great color combos here
I'd prefer the tracks to end a little higher on the canvas, I rather have more greenery below them so they don't sit at the edge of the painting

but that is reeaaaally just me nitpicking...

Linee
04-01-2008, 08:42 PM
Thanks JJ. I never thought about doing that. I can see the wisdom, though. My only thought is would I have to make the car less old? For now, I'll just change the title to "Mine Car Retired."

Thank you, Sergio.

Kathryn, it's funny you say that, because my original comp had the machine higher. :) Thanks for commenting.

tgsloth
04-01-2008, 08:54 PM
First, it's great. Wonderful drafting and great color contrast between the pinkish metal and the tree on the right. Two points composition wise

The top of the car is nearly halfway up the painting. This, I think, is the less than optimum placement which has led to calls for it to be higher. And there's an odd open space in the trees just above the cylinder of the mine car. I think it's a bit distracting and a continuation of the trees would serve to focus attention on the car a bit more.

MRSBB
04-01-2008, 09:07 PM
I think you have done a good job on the old mine car. I like how you handled the lighter trees in the background and like how they show thru the fir tree. I think this gives your painting more depth. You might just continue on with the railroad ties and track, but the short rail does keep your view in the painting. Keep having fun.........Lenore

Linee
04-01-2008, 10:20 PM
Bob and Lenore, thanks for looking and commenting. I appreciate it. It was fun, though I admit the trees were more fun than the car. :)

jgun
04-01-2008, 11:00 PM
You did great on the trees. The train is the focal point of the painting and should have 10 times more color and detail and accuracy than any other part. I would get rid of the train, and put in something you love, like a stream, with greens and browns and yellows and purples. have fun! you are great. Also, if you want to still work on the train, if the drum on the train is copper, it needs to reflect things about it, lots of darks and lights. If it is polished. Also the front of the train is pointing up to high. It seems out of perspective with the landscape. Also the golden mean was not followed in the composition drawing phase. But you are wonderful, it is a cute train with your beautiful sky and trees. psych. analysis- You are likely very sentimental and precious. Just paint what you love, nothing else. If your not having fun, then you are going down the wrong path. You will do well and paint well when you are enjoying yourself, with a big smile!

Linee
04-01-2008, 11:25 PM
Thanks, jgun. I do love what the train represents and that is my children's involvement in the historical club. Also I was drawn by a mixture of the evening light and the red and green combination. I knew the composition wasn't perfect, but I just had to have all the other elements. You're right when you say I'm sentimental. :)

Linee
04-01-2008, 11:29 PM
Thanks, jgun. I do love what the train represents and that is my children's involvement in the historical club. Also I was drawn by a mixture of the evening light and the red and green combination. The drum, btw, is rusted. I knew the composition wasn't perfect, but I just had to have all the other elements. You're right when you say I'm sentimental. :)

Sorry for the double post.