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Ms.Understood
10-18-2007, 04:12 PM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/10-18-2007/117883_misc_027.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Youth
Year Created: 2007
Medium: Acrylic
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 5x7
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
This is supposed to be a self portrait from many moons ago. In the photograph I was 19 or younger, I seemed to have aged myself in the painting some.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
Anything and everything that could help me. I'm a little too close to my subject matter--even though the girl in the picture is miles away....

tony1
10-18-2007, 04:27 PM
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/18-Oct-2007/82936-untitled.GIF

First this is a nice painting, very wll done. Second I'm not a portrait painter, but one thing did catch my eye, your upper lip is fuller in the painting. I tried a crude adjustment as to what I'm talking about.

I may be wrong, but that's what I see.

Anyway, great work.

horsthh
10-18-2007, 05:11 PM
I am a student myself, and I constantly hear the teacher say: Soften the edges, eyebrows, mouth and nose, very nice done.
Horst

Ms.Understood
10-18-2007, 05:15 PM
First this is a nice painting, very wll done. Second I'm not a portrait painter, but one thing did catch my eye, your upper lip is fuller in the painting. I tried a crude adjustment as to what I'm talking about.

I may be wrong, but that's what I see.

Anyway, great work.

Thank-you--and I DO see that.

Ms.Understood
10-18-2007, 05:18 PM
Soften the edges, eyebrows, mouth and nose, very nice done.
Horst
I think that'd probably help too--the photograph is such a soft focus, and I wanted a bit more contrast.

I should have gone with a larger size canvas--every mark this small is SO significant.

Candices_Creations
10-18-2007, 05:24 PM
Very pretty portrait ! I think in the photo, your face was a little rounder..I think you "aged" gracefully! I didn't notice the size of the canvas until you commented...wow, even more of a challenge..love the eyes. Thanks for sharing your work!

Ms.Understood
10-18-2007, 05:28 PM
Very pretty portrait ! I think in the photo, your face was a little rounder..I think you "aged" gracefully! I didn't notice the size of the canvas until you commented...wow, even more of a challenge..love the eyes. Thanks for sharing your work!
LOL--well I didn't age it to date!:D But thanks, I'm still holding up okay.;)
Thanks so much for the comments--I see the roundness you mention.

Corby
10-18-2007, 06:58 PM
Beautiful work! I especially like the eyes. The dark color you have used works nicely there. It does however register as black and it does not work in delineating the nose and the corners of the mouth, as well as neck outline and so on. The upper portion of the portrait reflects the beauty of the photo. The nose and down seem uncertain and as if you were tired of it. I would work at eliminating line and learn how to do shape distinctions by using value instead.

Slurps
10-18-2007, 07:41 PM
Shading around left nostril is not registering properly. I'd lose that part of the shading altogether. Upper lip looks like it's a bit hairy...you might have aged yourself a tiny bit in the portrait, but not that much! Soften the shading on the chin, top and bottom.

To tell you the truth, the photo, more than anything, is a reminder. Don't get this wrong, please, but it sort of looks like one of those "boudoir" photos. The great thing about that is that those photos, as cheesy as they can be at times, truly serve a purpose: they tell us that virtually every woman who has an inner strength and an inner love has a beauty to her....the shapes don't matter, the regularity of features don't matter.... Allanom, help me here, I get the feeling you might understand what I'm getting at.... The conventional considerations of what is beautiful deal only in superficial things... As trite as it sounds, a woman with a sweet soul is a beautiful woman...everything on the outside is just a wrapper.

There are tons of women who become more lovely as years pass. Ms. Understood gives me the impression she's one of them.

[so sorry if this seems sappy.... ]

Ms.Understood
10-18-2007, 10:08 PM
Shading around left nostril is not registering properly. I'd lose that part of the shading altogether. Upper lip looks like it's a bit hairy...you might have aged yourself a tiny bit in the portrait, but not that much! Soften the shading on the chin, top and bottom.

To tell you the truth, the photo, more than anything, is a reminder. That's the way I usaully treat it, then when I'm really trying to be accurate, it gets difficult...Don't get this wrong, please, but it sort of looks like one of those "boudoir" photos. It was--I was very "goth" at the time and my mom insisted I take some pretty pictures--I didn't know what I was in for, and hated every second! The great thing about that is that those photos, as cheesy as they can be at times, truly serve a purpose: they tell us that virtually every woman who has an inner strength and an inner love has a beauty to her....the shapes don't matter, the regularity of features don't matter.... that's truely beatiful.Allanom, help me here, I get the feeling you might understand what I'm getting at.... The conventional considerations of what is beautiful deal only in superficial things... As trite as it sounds, a woman with a sweet soul is a beautiful woman...everything on the outside is just a wrapper. No doubt!

There are tons of women who become more lovely as years pass. Ms. Understood gives me the impression she's one of them. Oh please, go on--NO REALLY!;)

[so sorry if this seems sappy.... ]
Bring on the sappy--I'll eat it up!:wave:

Ms.Understood
10-18-2007, 10:17 PM
The nose and down seem uncertain and as if you were tired of it. I would work at eliminating line and learn how to do shape distinctions by using value instead.
Truth betold I was tired of it!
Funny, today I'm working on a painting with less "detail", more "brushstroke"--it's very difficult me not to "line in" details...
I'm super glad I found wetcanvas! Great to hear objective feedback from everyone!

thomas w
10-19-2007, 08:57 AM
You have a unique style and I wouldn't worry to much about technical details. I do think the composition could be adjusted by pulling back a little from the person. The chin/cheek seems to be right on the edge of the canvas.
Thomas W

Ms.Understood
10-30-2007, 03:18 AM
well, I made some revisions based on the observations everyone helped me see. Now it may be too "maybeline"...She's younger, but is it the girl in the picture?:(

Ms.Understood
10-30-2007, 03:33 AM
Actually, let me put it next to the photo againhttp://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/30-Oct-2007/117883-ME.jpg