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misskrissy22
10-11-2007, 09:57 PM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/10-11-2007/119053_lady.jpg

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/10-11-2007/119053_120230.jpg

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/10-11-2007/119053_004032.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: no title yet
Year Created: 2007
Medium: Pencil
Surface: Paper
Dimension: 30.5x46.7
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
This was drawn from a picture I found online. I don't have a scanner so it may be alittle hard to see. I'm a little conce<br>ed with expression in the eyes. Just a not the model being used had breast implants so that is why they look a little on the fake side.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
what do you think? Ideas for improvement?

Slurps
10-11-2007, 10:20 PM
Shading needs quite a bit of work.
Dark vertical bar obscuring left side of her face is ambiguous and draws attention to her beaklike nose.
Exercise your prerogative as an artist: If the implants are something you feel the need to apologize for, you're not obligated to depict the breasts as augmented. You should either accept them as looking rigid and unnatural, or make them appear natural. In other words, don't feel trapped into a literal rendition of the reference photo. Otherwise, why should anyone care about this picture? That sounds harsh, but I'm trying to say that a viewer has the choice to be involved or to be neutral about a picture; it's your job to make them want to understand and question what you're saying in your work. Admitting that you've given none of your own spin to the image you saw somewhere makes this just a drawing exercise. Be an artist here, and you'll have no reason to apologize if any part of this picture has an artificial aspect: perhaps that's exactly what you intended.
The expression on her face is actually somewhat supportive of the drama suggested by the partially open door, so that's a good touch.
There's a lot to work with in this picture, and a lot to work on. Good start, though.

misskrissy22
10-11-2007, 10:58 PM
Thank you Slurps. I am actually just picking up the pencils again after a rather long time in which I had kids and worked full time. I'm hoping now to devote time to improvement. I only mentioned the fakeness because it has been pointed out to me that they look unnatural, I in fact am fine with this. I am curious on how I can improve the shadow on the face, for it was this darkness in the photograph that drew to the picture. Planning on keep trying, thanks for the insight.

ejtupi
10-12-2007, 12:57 AM
If that much of the head is obscured by the stuff on the right, how thick is this person's neck?!? Yikes. Sorry, the head and neck are freakishly out of proportion, from my point of view. Almost looks like a pre-op transsexual as a result. What exactly is that dark stuff along the door obscuring the face? Maybe I'd understand this if the photo was better....at least, I'm hoping that's my problem... The hands are pretty well modeled, in line with the gender uncertainty...
Actually, I think the eye is the best part, and the wide-eyed look is kind of consistent with the whole "opening the door even though you're not wearing any clothes" theme.

misskrissy22
10-12-2007, 01:30 AM
your ejtupi the neck does look large there, though I think part of it may be the buckling of the paper as this is out of the sketch book and doesn't look so odd when laid flat
In the photograph the shadow that fell on her face obscured the features completley. I kinda felt to that it wasn't transfering correctly but it was really what interested me. I'm going to try and find the photo again and perhaps rework.

Solidgadium
10-12-2007, 11:05 AM
The right shading will make or break the piece. You have to create the right lighting to convey the mood you are after. The white negative space behind your subject flattens the image. Sometimes you have to go beyond what you see in the photograph to make a piece work.

La_
10-12-2007, 12:46 PM
Welcome aboard misskrissy22,

looks like you've spent a fair pile of time on this and it's a great effort, but - and there's Always a but here - do it again from the start and keep this one in your files. in my opinion - the boobs are the best part of this piece, her right one is nicely done, and the hand is pretty good too.
Anyway, VERY softly get everything placed (head/shoulders/neck/backbone/eyes etc) in a stickman/skeletal form, then give it muscles and skin, THEN give it shadows ... the Dark shadow you have looks like you did have some detail under it at some point and I understand it's the high contrast that attracted you in the first place, which is cool, adds drama, however it's just too strong and I wonder why it doesn't flow all the way down her body too?
Would love to see the pic your working from - has fabulous potential and I'd really like to see more works from you !

La