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LarrySeiler
07-16-2000, 09:48 AM
Okay Bob...

I took just a little extra time to photoshop and Power Point this composition of yours. Your new submission of changes made came out dark on my system for some reason too, don't know why.

At any rate...I thought this might best explain what I was originally trying to get at...here it is, with a few visual aides...
<IMG SRC="http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/User/Sunset5Bobsart.jpg" border=0>

You can see I have divided the picture in half. You now have the option of formal balance or symmetrical...which you have not opted for obviously. The other option is asymmetrical. Now...if for some aesthetic reason the artist wishes to create tension in the piece, perhaps to disturb the viewer, one does not have to balance the painting at all. I would suspect you wish to leave the viewer with a tranquil feeling so I will assume "tension" is not the device you want.

You can see from the dividing line, that nearly 90% of the visual mass resides to the right of that line. The rocks do assist in leading the eye to the upper cloud, and the brightness of the sun in the way of contrast with the ground always bridges and leads the eye up...(signified by my curved arrow line leading up).

Something is needed as a "device" to lead the eye over to the other side of the painting to balance out this image and avoid the tension I eluded to. You have a bit of a finger from the cloud that acts as a "pointer" but its effect is minimal in lieu of the overwhelming weight on the right and lower side.

I drew a line coming down about to the 8 O'clock position pointing to an area I outlined with an oval, thinking it needs something about here...some dynamic that says "look at me!" so that the eye does not trail off the right side of the picture plane and leave. I do not think the finger cloud above is sufficient as a device to alone pull the eye over.

Now...there may be other devices to alleviate this problem, and one may have been to position the heavier rocks slightly more left of the dividing line, then you would have a diagonal play going on, and still that might make the balance "trite."

Thus..I was thinking of a slightly darker cloud here (oval)...perhaps a seagull, something. JMO (just my opinion)

Larry

carly
07-16-2000, 07:55 PM
Hi, was just wondering...is this Haystack Rock off the Oregon coast?

LarrySeiler
07-16-2000, 11:15 PM
wouldn't know Carly....perhaps when Bob checks this thread out he'll let us know...

Larry

CT
07-17-2000, 07:20 PM
Hi, Bob!

I think the thing that hurt you here was placing the large mass of rocks right in the middle of the foreground of this very vertical motif. There just isn't really any way around it and still maintain the feeling that you said you were striving. Don't feel too bad....I just dug out an ancient photo of a piece that I did over thirty years ago, a sunrise (east coast) on the beach, and I did almost the same thing, but I managed it in a horizontal motif. I'll bet you learned alot from this piece, and that's what really matters....good luck....CT

LarrySeiler
07-17-2000, 10:30 PM
I ditto CT's comments Bob...your effort and time consumed in thought has no doubt already contributed to other works that has benefitted.

Its never a loss.....

Larry

bobsart
07-18-2000, 12:52 AM
Larry....Thanx for the special critique. I wish I would have been able to use your expertise when I was working this piece.

This was done in 1991 and has been hanging on a stairwell wall ever since. I would often cringe when I would look at it because I too felt it was assymetrical. What's weird is I feel most of the activity is to the left of the vertical line and below the horizon line. I also feel that the left side of the vertical does not seem to belong to the right side of the vertical. I never intended for this tension to happen. I wanted the viewer to get the feeling that one might have after spending a long day at the beach and finally firing up the grill and sitting down with friends to munch on hotdogs and watch the sun go down. I think you alluded to that "tranquil feeling". This piece was pretty much illconceived as I did this piecemeal.

After years of studying this albatross, I think I should have added more clouds to the left of the vertical as you suggested. I should have also added more rocks and maybe some spray to the right of the large rock on about the same plane as the breaking wave. The goal would be to tie both sides of the picture together.

To answer Carly's question, Every thing in the picture was from my imagination except the sky. I copied it from a photo I snapped of a farmers corn field...bob http://www.wetcanvas.com/ubb/smile.gif