J. D. Hillberry and anyone else..whats wrong with this?

[birdlady]

I have worked on this for soooooo long I just cant seem to see whats wrong with it. Objectivity has left. Now that I finally have the matt for it and thought it was ready to hang ...I DONT think so. Not going to say who she is in hopes all of u recognize her. Critques welcome.

Laurie

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/17-May-2002/my_ideal.jpg


OH and the framer wants to dry mount it because of the size 18x24...should I?

[Robert_H]

Outstanding piece. :D Looks like you put a lot of hard work in to it. Theres one thing that stands out to me, the hair where it meets the head looks like its floating there. Not for sure how to correct that other than some slight blending where they meet up.

Ill venture a guess as to who it is: OW?

[birdlady]

TY Robert
hmmmmmmm think your right. u just dont see things after a while. And I put her away for a week too..sigh. think I can still lighten it as I havent really sealed it yet. good guess BTW

Laurie

[Shehaub]

There is no doubt about who this is. I believe you have a very good likeness.

[J. D. Hillberry]

Laurie,

This is very nice. I know what you mean about not being able to look at a piece objectively after a while. One of the tricks I use is to hold it up to a mirror. The reverse view is like looking at something for the first time. I also carefully take my pieces around to view under different light sources - even outside. Finally, try putting it away for a week or two. You will see it with fresh eyes when you look at it again.

I agree with softening the transition between the hair and the face. Right now, it looks kind of like a wig. Darkening the shadow side of the face would also help bring more continuity between the hair and the face.

I would also soften the highlights on the upper lips. The lower lip always catches more light.

Your light source is coming from the upper left so keep this in mind when you are rendering the lips. They should get darker in value as they curve around to the shadow side of her face. I would also darken the values on the right side of the nose to give more depth to the face.


Over all this is very good. Unless there is a deadline for completion, I wouldn't worry about how long you have worked on something. The important thing is to keep learning from each piece.

These are just my opinions about how to improve your drawing. There are plenty of extremely talented artists here that may help you see what you feel your drawing is lacking.


Keep up the good work

J. D.

Oh yes. One more thing. Unless your paper is very wrinkled and there is no other option to fix it, I DO NOT recommend dry mounting original drawings. They should be hinge mounted to an acid free mat with acid free framers tape.