PDA

View Full Version : Notice.


laudesan
05-11-2006, 12:20 AM
I am hurt and distressed by the backstabbing and gossip that has been going on behind the scenes lately.

Shame on you, you know who you are..

This website is about art, not winning popularity contests.

artmom
05-11-2006, 02:11 AM
Why not discuss this with the people involved, instead of posting another upsetting, divisive thread, JJ?

This kind of post does no good, except raise questions.

Lyn

Yorky
05-11-2006, 02:28 AM
My sympathies are with you JJ, but I have to agree with Lyn.

All we can do as individuallys is to act correctly ourselves and give respect to all members of the forum.

Doug

Aquarelle10
05-11-2006, 03:20 AM
I agree with Doug and Lyn but maybe airing a problem might solve it also if there is one.

This is a terrific forum.

The positive side of Wet Canvas is the wonderful art shared and the freely given advise,demonstrations and technical support shown to all members from beginner to professional.

I especially love that a beginner is made to feel so welcome for sharing at a stage when it isn't easy to be so brave sometimes.

The many friendships that form are priceless and it's an honour to be a tiny part of such a huge Art community.

These are positive things I will focus on.

All we can do as individuallys is to act correctly ourselves and give respect to all members of the forum.

Well said Doug. I agree.

God Bless.

Jean.

jaytee
05-11-2006, 04:45 AM
JJ......I agree with all thats been said so far in reply......... if you are hurt and distressed then I guess you feel you may be involved, in which case my best advice would be to report the evidence to the Mods in private.

I would urge anyone in receipt of upsetting pms/emails to do the same.....if Char and Doug don't know its happening how can they deal with it ???

And I do so hope newbies wont get upset or put off staying here by events that probably involve only a minority of members - though the effects can spread throughout the community if we do not all work very hard to maintain a respectful and supportive climate ..............while not burying our heads in the sand to some of the 'less desirable goings on'.

I had hoped we were making some progress along the road to civilised and open resolution of any problems.......... and encouraging debate that respects our differences.............Char has been leading this particular effort most admirably IMO by highlighting in threads she has started the benefits of sometimes passionate ... but always respectful discussion.

Where I do agree with JJ is in my distaste and dislike of overt 'popularity contest' behaviour.............but then I have never been impressed by WHO folk are ( or think they are)........... but rather by how they behave ............ and in the business I was in for 20 years I had plenty of opportunity to study the Prima Donna - male or female - at close quarters :)

I particulary remember one orchestral rehearsal for a broadcast from the Royal Festival Hall where the soloist and conducter had had an argument and refused to speak to each other except through a third party !!!!! It was also my experience in that long BBC career that the greater the artist ( Im talking of top classical musicians and entertainers now ) the more modest, thoughtful, considerate and appreciative their behaviour behind the scenes and towards others.........

Interesting, Eh ? :)

painterbear
05-11-2006, 05:03 AM
Amen to what has been said ^^^^.

I agree with JJ's distress about the misuse of the PM system, but feel Lyn and others have a valid point about airing it cryptically in public.

Definitely report whatever has troubled you to Doug and Char and let them help sort it out, that's what they get paid the big $$$ to do. ;) :evil:

Peace to all,

Sylvia

Nandie
05-11-2006, 06:46 AM
others have a valid point about airing it cryptically in public.


Amen, Sylvia. Just stop it people! These cryptic messages do nothing but stir the pot and get everyone all upset, many who weren't even aware there was a problem...... like me! :( Why drag everyone into a problem they have nothing to do with?

CharM
05-11-2006, 06:59 AM
Awwwh, JJ... I'm so sorry that you've been caught up in this *behind the scenes* nonsense... I do wish that you'd report it, though... you shouldn't have to deal with it on an ongoing basis...

The PM system is there for us as a privilege to discuss off topic information, or share personal information such as email addresses, etc.

It is NOT a vehicle by which you can harrass, bully or denounce someone... It is NOT there for you to make derrogatory remarks that you are too cowardly to post publicly... When you elect to use the system in this manner you're abusing it...

If you can't say something out loud, or in the public forums, then don't say it at all...

NodakerDeb
05-11-2006, 07:01 AM
As usual, I haven't got a clue what is going on, and for that I am very thankful!

I hope everything gets resolved, whatever it is.

Deb

Uschi
05-11-2006, 07:23 AM
As usual, I haven't got a clue what is going on, and for that I am very thankful!

I hope everything gets resolved, whatever it is.

Deb

What Deb said!
Uschi

Becky-Bob
05-11-2006, 07:39 AM
While I agree with Doug and JT to a point, I am distressed that JJ feels the need (probably justifiably so) to bring this to a public attention. And I feel very badly for JJ that it has come to this. PM harrassment to me is going against what WC is all about, and if such activity IS going on, and I believe that it is...then there needs to be some discipline in action, even to the point of banning. And I'm sorry that it would come to that. JMO

{{{{JJ}}}}

NorahT
05-11-2006, 08:47 AM
As usual, I haven't got a clue what is going on, and for that I am very thankful!

I hope everything gets resolved, whatever it is.

Deb
Amen!

olliewood0702
05-11-2006, 08:48 AM
:confused: :confused: Not sure what is going on but....


It all comes down to what my Mom always told me and Char touched on "IF YOU DON'T HAVE ANYTHING NICE TO SAY......THEN SAY NOTHING AT ALL!!:(



((((JJ)))))

yahooserious
05-11-2006, 08:50 AM
:confused:

Starsprite
05-11-2006, 09:01 AM
I am hurt and distressed by the backstabbing and gossip that has been going on behind the scenes lately.

Shame on you, you know who you are..

This website is about art, not winning popularity contests.


Well, it's not me..I know that! Not sure I have a clue as to who or what you are talking about either JJ. Sorry you are hurt and distressed about it though.

olliewood0702
05-11-2006, 09:18 AM
Sure Patty....he he he ;)
:D

Starsprite
05-11-2006, 09:21 AM
Sure Patty....he he he ;)
:D

LOL Darla!!! :lol: :lol: Now we are all wondering who it is.

olliewood0702
05-11-2006, 09:35 AM
Patty, :lol:

Honestly...I NEVER get any fun:rolleyes::smug: ...... but I'm NOT COMPLAINING mind you!!!!:rolleyes:
I guess some people just have TOO MUCH TIME ON THEIR HANDS and NO LIFE...:confused: well know what I say about that??? GET ONE!!!!:D :evil:

Jenoir
05-11-2006, 09:49 AM
As usual, I haven't got a clue what is going on, and for that I am very thankful!

I hope everything gets resolved, whatever it is.

Deb

Well said Deb, I have to ditto that too!!

giddy up
05-11-2006, 10:05 AM
It is not me!
I am still too new to be backstabbing anyone.
If JJ has been getting this type of PM, that is just wrong!!!!
JJ you have been nothing but helpful to me :) :)

pampe
05-11-2006, 10:31 AM
JJ

go to the source or to your Moderators......

maryrose
05-11-2006, 10:58 AM
As usual, I haven't got a clue what is going on, and for that I am very thankful!

I hope everything gets resolved, whatever it is.

Deb
Me, too! (((JJ)))

Though I'm not aware of this issue, I was pm'ed by some caring folks a while back that some nasty stuff about me was being "pm'ed" around.

I have only used the pm system to speak directly to issues with individual members..and only when I've felt that public statements would be hurtful and divisive. We do have the ability to block them, thank goodness...if we are being pestered.

I do believe that a private message is the proper venue to resolve prickly little issues ...with the least amount of upset to those involved and the rest of the community.

When the pm system is used to gossip about, make fun of, or gang up on another member, however....the damage done to the target member is monumental. Though the readers of the hurtful pm's may be fair-minded individuals...once an unchallenged characterization of a person is privately "set in words" to non-involved parties, it sticks and hurts.

We can and will rise above this stuff, JJ, if we push forward and ignore the pettiness the best we can.

The forum rights itself...and continues to grow and nurture us all.

pampe
05-11-2006, 11:04 AM
Maryrose...I am truly sorry you had to experience that first hand ((hug))

FriendCarol
05-11-2006, 11:11 AM
It was also my experience in that long BBC career that the greater the artist ( Im talking of top classical musicians and entertainers now ) the more modest, thoughtful, considerate and appreciative their behaviour behind the scenes and towards others.........Oddly enough, this holds true also, in my personal experience, for great (famous, even) teachers/professors, writers (authors), business leaders, theologians, actors.... Living in Manhattan and consulting for over 20 years, I had the privilege of speaking (usually briefly) with some 'famous' people in many walks of life. All the great ones, without exception, focused on the subject rather than any tangential matters. All, without exception, had a sense of humor about themselves, and ignored any status-jostling that happened to be going on around them. It's the wanna-be's, the second-raters, who seem to focus on secondary issues, rather than the subject.

Hope you feel supported, JJ. :grouphug:

Yorky
05-11-2006, 11:12 AM
Anyone receiving an objectionable pm should forward it to myself or Char so we can consider it alongside others that have been reported.

Sorry you were subjected to this tactic Maryrose, we must do what we can to stamp it out.

Doug

Aquarelle10
05-11-2006, 02:10 PM
When the pm system is used to gossip about, make fun of, or gang up on another member, however....the damage done to the target member is monumental

I've thought about these words. I realise that where ever you are in life there will always be people around who cannot cope with others success, happiness or popularity.

Mary Rose I am so sorry you've had a bad experience in Wet Canvas but I admire you for being so honest as to share your experience here.

To follow your lead I will be open and admit that I've felt like a target in here too but I've dealt with it in my own way.

I would recommend that anyone who has a problem at all either by PM or any other form please contact Doug or Char because they really can help BUT only if they are aware of what is going on.

Jean.

Bob(2)
05-11-2006, 03:11 PM
JJ, you have always been helpful to me. Heck, I did not know that type of thing was happening, sure shows a lack of maturity, or much insecurity!

But, I'm so new, I don't get many PMs anyhow...

Life is too short for this kind of stuff. For me, I'm just so easy going, I have learned to let it go and focus on the important things in life!

Aquarelle10
05-11-2006, 04:45 PM
Bob this is the third time tonight I have read one of your replies in total admiration.

I agree 100%.

Jean.

juneto
05-11-2006, 05:33 PM
I congratulate JJ on exposing something she believes to be insidious to the community, as a whole ,by saying what she Really thinks ,Publicly, rather than behind closed doors. it takes Courage.

This is the Second time this Month, that I have read the suggestion ,that messaging has become malicious,ugly and mean-spirited . This is a reaction to something the Community knows is wrong, so those who speak out against it should not be the ones held to task for exposing it . I think I remember this Garbage in High School , it really doesn't belong here . I think we should listen to what Fair-minded people are trying to tell us.
Don't Shoot the Messenger, For Goodness sake.
June

artmom
05-11-2006, 07:19 PM
June, I don't see anyone "shooting the messenger.":eek:

Most people have pointed out a more effective way of dealing with this problem by bringing it to the attention of the Moderators than by posting a non-specific thread that makes us look suspiciously at other members.

The rest of us are unable to help because we do not have all the facts.

JJ has been a productive member here for a long time and should know the best procedure for dealing with this type of problem. Personally, I would just add the offending member to my ignore list.

Lyn

maltman
05-11-2006, 07:43 PM
JJ...I too have no idea what you're talking about or who has upset you....but who cares!...you must know by now that 99% ( if not more) of the people here consider you a friend, a colleague, an artist , and (to quote the Aussies)....."a bloody good bloke"...so what I say ( in good old fashioned Anglo Saxon) is " Sod 'em"....majority rules!

Ignore them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....

Your Pal

Malty the Magnificent!

PS....trying to stop pms...is like trying to stope phone calls!.....just accept the fact that you're one OK Sheila! (sp?)

PPS...I can swear 'cos its my birthday!

Becky-Bob
05-11-2006, 07:51 PM
Prove it Malty. Where's your birthday suit? :p :lol: :lol: :thumbsup:

jaytee
05-11-2006, 08:11 PM
Prove it Malty. Where's your birthday suit? :p :lol: :lol: :thumbsup:

:lol: If youre modest you could show us from behind :lol:

laudesan
05-11-2006, 08:26 PM
for your support I really do, but this wasn't about me personally..

I am pleased, very pleased some of you don't know what I am talking about, lets keep it that way.

For those of us that do know, please think very hard about it.

The very persons' you are targeting could very well be the persons who you need most.

The PM system is there for us as a privilege to discuss off topic information, or share personal information such as email addresses, etc.

It is NOT a vehicle by which you can harass, bully or denounce someone... It is NOT there for you to make derrogatory remarks that you are too cowardly to post publicly... When you elect to use the system in this manner you're abusing it...

If you can't say something out loud, or in the public forums, then don't say it at all...
Thank you Char!!!

I congratulate JJ on exposing something she believes to be insidious to the community, as a whole ,by saying what she Really thinks ,Publicly, rather than behind closed doors. it takes Courage.

This is the Second time this Month, that I have read the suggestion ,that messaging has become malicious,ugly and mean-spirited . This is a reaction to something the Community knows is wrong, so those who speak out against it should not be the ones held to task for exposing it . I think I remember this Garbage in High School , it really doesn't belong here . I think we should listen to what Fair-minded people are trying to tell us.
Don't Shoot the Messenger, For Goodness sake.
June

Thank you June!!

We could loose some very valuable members from our Forum and once gone I know they wont be back.

I said in my original post "You Know Who You Are" and I stand by that.

But I will add, some very important people are watching..

Malty the Magnificent you are a treasure.. :)

Dake
05-11-2006, 08:35 PM
Happy Birthday Malty!

JJ, Hey who's been on your back?
There's a few ways of dealing with it. As we all know those that lurk sabotaging in the dark are gutless wonders. I would prefer face to face at noon. I know many here find me irritating but they're equally intimidated...with good cause I might add...I have had perhaps 3 negative PMs since I've been here. I'm an irritating [email protected]^$*%d ....you JJ are one of the more gentle people, I think your persecutors ought to come and visit me in PM mode, I'd very much enjoy dousing their enthusiasm.
Dake

Grainne
05-11-2006, 09:00 PM
Prove it Malty. Where's your birthday suit? :p :lol: :lol: :thumbsup:


I third this motion!! :clap: :D :D :evil:

:wave:
Grainne

pampe
05-11-2006, 10:30 PM
*waiting for Malty's BD suit photo*

NorahT
05-11-2006, 10:58 PM
He might need to move that paper bag around a bit :D

St Ives
05-11-2006, 11:03 PM
But I will add, some very important people are watching..

Right, JJ...that's me...and who else?:lol: :lol:

this wasn't about me personally..

In all fairness to those of us who don't have a clue what is going on, I honestly think the people "who this is about, personally", should be addressing the issue (whatever the heck it might be), to the moderators. By starting this thread, you are involving the rest of us in what sounds to me like a personal dispute by a very few people.

I said in my original post "You Know Who You Are" and I stand by that.

I don't think it is fair to the uninvolved to make a blanket statement like that...no one else knows who "they" are..it simply throws suspision on the rest of us. If you know, why aren't you going directly to them?

We could loose some very valuable members from our Forum and once gone I know they wont be back.

SINCE MOST OF US HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON, what are we supposed to do? Beg these phantom members to stay? We can't...we don't know who they are or why they are threatening to leave! Maybe these "very important people" can step in and put a stop to this nonsense...or better yet, get it resolved off the forum.

I do agree with June that there is obviously a problem...but my instinct says it involves only a very, very few people. Please...do the rest of us a favor and resolve it off the forum.

artmom
05-11-2006, 11:22 PM
JJ, I agree "very important people are watching."

I consider each and every member of this forum, and, indeed, of the whole of WC! as "very important people."

I don't know whom you consider "very important people."
And I don't know why they are watching. And, frankly, I don't care. Let's get on with painting.

Lyn

CharM
05-11-2006, 11:46 PM
I've had a very exciting night... some guy has been posting porn all over the place and I've been chasing him trying to get it removed...

My patience is now wearing very thin... and I apologize for that...

But... without facts, this is a tempest in a teapot... I won't have accusations flying, suspicions raised and people looking over their shoulders...

This site is about art... and Lyn... AMEN!

The thread is now closed for business... go paint...