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londonfluffy_bunny
01-16-2006, 09:23 AM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/01-16-2006/72066_a_masterpiece.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Portait of best friend
Year Created: 2005
Medium: Pen/Ink
Surface: Paper
Dimension: A4
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
First post here. I did this portrait of my best friend during the Christmas holidays. Its in a style I've been developing recently for fun.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
Does it have any strengths? Likewise, what are its major weaknesses?

Grunge
01-16-2006, 11:07 AM
HEY I LIKE YOUR STYLE!!! This is a really great drawing. I think one of it's great strengths is the background. So many portraits lack a background. You've got one and it is terribly interesting. You've got good expression. Wonderful job!

Spyderbabe
01-16-2006, 11:17 AM
Strong linear style... it tells a story and its interesting.
Weaknesses? --hmmm not sure about the solid heavy shadows of the shelves...perspective seems a bit wonky?

Corby
01-16-2006, 01:12 PM
I like your balance between white and dark, and all on a diagonal axis. The line is fluid, crisp and clear which is also nice, and like Grunge, I appreciate the background. I am always interested in what ones environment says about them. Where did your friend get the old flat iron? It burns either charcoal or kerosene. My mom had one. I tended to wear well pressed and sooty shirts!

T Christensen
01-16-2006, 05:18 PM
Very cool but I agree with Spyderbabe about the dark areas..they seem to be floating over the drawing rather than part of it...........TerryC

Dana Design
01-16-2006, 05:56 PM
Yes, the perspective on the bottoms of the shelves is off but the objects on the shelves are very interesting. In fact, they're more interesting than the figure. The figure is well drawn but needs something, some darks, some shading.....I don't know. I realize that you've done this in a very linear style and I like that a lot. Perhaps darkening her hair somewhat would bring her foreward a bit more.

Well done and welcome to WC!

Dhuot
01-17-2006, 01:30 AM
Beautiful line drawing .
Very nice composition too.
It's got strenght for sure, and you get to capture so much with "Lines" :eek:

More :clap:

Constellation
01-17-2006, 08:30 AM
THis is so interesting! I just want to study the whole thing and the linear drawing is great.... simple yet elegant and precise! Would using hatching for shadows improve that heaviness without distracting?.... The shadows don't really bother me, I think it gives the drawing substance and makes it more interesting. Donna

sugar tree gal
01-17-2006, 09:04 PM
Pen and Ink... this is new to me... most drawing I see and do are pencil.. interesting.... I think it is pretty darn good... need to try this... I also think the objects are neat... like seeing real things in PEOPLE drawing or paingings. So if you are new.. Welcome to Wet Canvas.... and keep putting your work on ...:) Janice

londonfluffy_bunny
01-18-2006, 09:41 AM
Thanks for all the feedback- I'm torn about the shadows myself.

It was done in my friend's mum's house in Germany. Her mum collects antiques hence the range of items.

I think- from what I've read that either I need to add some level of shadow/ shading to the main focus as well, or avoid them in the background? Hatching is an interesting suggestion. I don't know if it would quite go with what I'm trying to do, but I've always loved those old Victorian drawings of people and places and that might be something to develop in parallel.

Many thanks,

Lorna :)

jocelynsart
01-18-2006, 12:00 PM
I really love this! The style is terrific!
The black areas totally support the figure, works well.
The black shadow on the right, under the shelf does not read right. It is reading as a slanted semi opaque shelf to me. Maybe that shadow's shape and density could have been designed a bit better to work well graphically as do the other areas. All three shadows don't read great but the center one is ok.
Jocelyn

tbezesky
01-18-2006, 11:37 PM
Very interesting line, smooth without being to deliberate. I love it.

vhere
01-20-2006, 05:00 AM
I'm not sure about those heavy black shadows - if you are going to use tone then you need to use it throughout,

Look at Aubrey Beardsley. He uses areas of solid black but more in the sense of pattern than tone and I think that would work better with this style you are working in.

The lines are strong and clear and good.

Look at Schiele as well for use of incisive lines, less graphic but useful to look at.

dtrex
01-21-2006, 01:52 AM
I'm new, but I'll throw my two cents in anyway. Like it a lot. The wonky perspective/dark shadows don't trouble me. The busier background helps move the figure to the foreground, but the top shelf intersecting with her hairline tends to pull her back a bit. I had a brief sense of looking at a coloring book page, but the dark areas negated that image. From the number of comments generated, I'd say this was a success. But, I'd say that anyway.