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DantesDaughter
04-22-2005, 09:58 PM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/04-22-2005/11350_deja.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: WIP - Deja
Year Created: 2005
Medium: Oil
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 18 x 24
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
Work in progress... This is my first oil painting after a year of doing computer art instead. The painting still has many more hours of work to be put in, (4 so far) yet I'm curious about some techniques.

Also, fyi the girl is wearing a hooded outfit with a furry top n cuffs... It's not so clear yet. She kinda looks like Ronald McDonald right now *chuckles*

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
All comments appreciated.... and/or

#1 What is the best way to blend colors to get that "heavy metal style"... is it with a fluffy paintbrush, and blend away? I'm being semi-commissioned for these paintings of girls, and ultimately I think that is what these people want. I didn't intend that style with this painting, though I may change it.

#2 Any thoughts on the best stuff to mix in with your paints when working on portraits like this?

#3 I'm almost cringing on the flat, cold black that I used. Just had to state that... although the detail on the shoes isn't showing up on this pic. (we artists are always so critical of ourselves, no?) ughhh that right leg looks overworked.

#4 Do the feet hanging off those shoes bother you? heh

Dhuot
04-22-2005, 10:36 PM
Hello Amélie (Poulain ??)

Yes, HER right toes sticking out is a bit bothering me, but that could be an easy fix.

Who`s Rénald MacDDonald ?? An artist (EEK !) I don`t know ?? :D

Why " Deja " ??

Cause here, Montréal ( French ) it meens " Allready "

The flat black is pretty hard to see, but I know what you meen. On the shoes, it looks pretty good though....you could even add some hints of red/purpple

Is she in a fire station ?? ( the post ) :D :D

corfublue
04-22-2005, 10:57 PM
I would say this is closer to finished than you think. don't overwork it as there is this element that leaves so much to the imagination.
very cool.
I like alot, infact I always wanted to do a series at a "club" as I used to spend lots of time there working as a bartender.
I would like to see more.
You are capturing the moment withour giving to much info.

laketrees
04-23-2005, 01:27 AM
I think it works very well and I wouldn't do too much to it ...I quite like the toes hanging over the shoes...adds to her personality.... :D
cheers kim

Warwick
04-23-2005, 02:15 AM
This is a good piece of art. Looking at the contours of the figure, I suppose she's a she-male? Your style is assured and expressive. :clap:

DantesDaughter
04-24-2005, 11:43 PM
Dhout: I think I'm gonna keep that toe sticking out. I can't explain it, but I have come to like it! *chuckles* Maybe it just displays reality rather than the ideal.
Ronal McDonald? You are kiddddding... right? hehe Le Big Mac! The scary clown!
Deja, because that is her *stage* name. It's a real girl that I'm painting. I've done a lot more work on her and will post an update soon. I am painting girls at a strip club because 1) it's a guaranteed sale 2) it pays the bills and 3) It's great practice and 4) beats working for a cranky boss
I did add some color to the shoes... they are coming along nicely =)
Thanks for responding!

Corfublu: I agree that it looks okay and does leave a lot to the imagination, yet I gotta make these girls look as close to the real thing as I can, and this is the undercoat for the detailed work. Plus, eek, my paints dried up while I was out of town, so I had to whip up a fresh batch. I've never had paint dry so quickly!
Yup, this painting and more to come are girls from an adult club... It's kinda fun posing the girls and playing dress-up, but I tell ya... some of those girls are just wacked! hehe. One thinks that aliens visited her house the other night! :rolleyes:

Kim: Yes! I agree! I'm keeping the overgrown toes. I think they add pizazz!

Warwick: Hahahahahaha no my friend, she's not a she-male. That did give me quite a laugh. If she still looks like a she-male when I'm done, lemme know please! haha
Is my style assured? I never know. I felt pretty buggy doing it, but I should expect that after such a long break.

Thanks for the feedback everyone, and sorry for not posting it in the WIP area...duh on me.

~Amelia :D

Warwick
04-25-2005, 12:19 AM
More pictures please. :wave:

DantesDaughter
04-25-2005, 04:08 AM
Hehehe here's an updated shot... needs a couple more hours of work, and then she'll be done.

Dhuot
04-25-2005, 09:25 PM
Amélie, now this face is coming out nicely

And her clothes are incredibly well painted

More
More :D

pakc
04-25-2005, 09:39 PM
I got the feeling that the oversized shoes for the tiny feet that this might be a child playing grown up.....
The face still makes it l look like a teenager....was this on purpose?
interesting play on the feet hands and face and youthful breasts compared to the subject of pole dancing.

Esmeralinda
04-26-2005, 08:04 AM
Hi,
All has been well said already. Just wanted to say that this is cool and I think you have a great idea going. Love those reds :clap:

DantesDaughter
04-29-2005, 05:49 PM
It's done!

First, to respond to comments earlier....

Pakc: Hehehe yes those shoes do seem oversized, but if you check the length of her feet you will notice that they actually do fit... it's just that she is leaning on them with that pose and her feet slide through hehehe I did think of dress-up when I was painting them, but the rest of the scene made me think otherwise lol. Thank you so much for commenting!

Esmeralinda: Awwwww what a sweetie. Thank you!

...

Secondly, she's done!.. well, almost... yeah.... except for what you guys tell me to change hehe Ta daaa...

I posted this in structured critiques as well since it's complete... slap me on the wrist for posting in both. I am searching for as many comments as possible since my eyes have been focused on computer/corporate art for so long. I won't do it again :)

And.... I hate seeing them side by side as I flinch at the differences... but fair is fair. Here's the original reference.... http://www.kirkner.net/amelia/deja_ref.jpg and here's the finished, full size painting in large detail (it looks much better than the cruddy, small version pictured): http://www.kirkner.net/amelia/deja_full.jpg

I see bits and pieces off in the drawing after painting on top. I also didn't manage to capture her expression (and the tilt) as well as I would have liked. I think a few changes may correct this. I actually repainted her face three times before I got it to look more shapely than mush. What do you guys think about the brush strokes and tonal differences on her skin, too harsh? I'm really getting annoyed by the unnatural shadow under her eye... gonna fix that. Also, think I should add the glitter to her fabric and rivets in her shoes? Probably huh.

Welp, thanks again for looking over my stuff. Much appreciated and valued all :D

~Amelia :eek:

Esmeralinda
04-29-2005, 06:38 PM
Hi,
Deja is beautifully sexy! Super job on those legs.... :clap: and all of her ... really :clap:
But for some reason, I prefer the second post (dated 24th or 25th). I think this last post is also very good but the face seems different. Nothing much, just what I felt when I saw it. I just can't put my finger on it. Is it too detailed ??? Ummm...I'll be back...////Do I sound annoying ? Don't mean to.
Because this is super cool ! :clap:

Salut, me again. I just checked your links and know now what I was referring to. Her body is smaller than maybe it should be for her face size. But no problem, it just gives her that certain look which is perfect. Also I noticed that beautiful pink you painted between her lips which is a great touch. :clap:

Mikey
04-30-2005, 08:19 AM
Amelia, you've shown us tremendous confidence with the colours and composition. This has to be your creativity at work and I would never question that. The feet over the shoes are all part of that assertive so what attitude.

Mikey

DantesDaughter
05-02-2005, 01:12 AM
Esmeralinda: Thanks! I think the legs are sexy too. I couldn't bear to paint over the "constructed look" there.
I understand why you like the second painting. I did too, but it wasn't near as detailed as I wanted to go. Her face was not defined and looked fine, but my mind didn't accept that she was done. Plus the photo was not color-retouched like the recent one, so the hues are different. Alas, there is no "undo" buttons with painting, (which I have cursed many times! heh) yet I am content with this piece so far regardless.
And ya know what? You are absolutely correct on the body being too thin. I also made the face too small at first and fixed that for this recent version. I didn't think to double check the body as well. Good call! It's on my list! Cheers! :D

Mikey: The confidence in the brush strokes comes from a book I read recently. It says to only put down strokes and colors that need to be there. Makes sense. heh. So that's what I've been drilling in my head. Next I'm going to blend the colors and see where that takes me. Quite honestly this has been a challenging painting! Thanks so much for the comments :wave:

~Amelia :eek:

artbabe21
05-02-2005, 10:48 AM
moving this to the WIP forum...