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Artguy29
08-29-2004, 01:54 PM
This is an attempt at painting with an oil-like feel and one of my first from pure imagination. I really piled up the paint on this one! 9"x12" acrylic on canvas. C&C more than welcome. Thanks,

Dave

SilverLady
08-29-2004, 03:40 PM
Maybe some work on edge of water, from where it is coming from. It looks a little choppy, like brush strokes.
Silverlady

Artguy29
08-29-2004, 03:49 PM
Silverlady,
You're right, it definitely needs some work. Thanks for pointing that out.

Dave

Artguy29
08-29-2004, 05:29 PM
Fixed up the edge:

sassybird
08-29-2004, 07:04 PM
There seems to be some perspective problems with the right side of the little cabin. It looks like it is leaning towards the left. You also need some spray around the rocks sticking out. Water of that force doesn't flow but crashes against anything in it's way.

Artguy29
08-29-2004, 07:35 PM
Thanks, Charissa. It sure is hard getting everything right without working from a photo! I see what you mean about the cabin and the rocks. I'll be sure to fix them up. Thanks again,

Dave

idahogirl
08-29-2004, 08:34 PM
I like the liveliness of the brushstrokes... :clap: :clap: :clap: be careful you don't "fix" it so much you lose that freshness....

Dee

Artguy29
08-29-2004, 08:50 PM
Thanks, Dee. Just a note to everyone: The quality of the color of the paint did not change from the first to the second photo, as it appears to do; it's just the lighting of my studio.

Dave

Lady Carol
08-29-2004, 10:48 PM
I love the sky colours.

Not sure about the water but anyway........

jyvonne
08-30-2004, 06:59 AM
Hi Dave!

First of all, I want to say I love your color selection! The sky is beautiful. I also like how you added the beach.

What jumps out to me is the direction of the waterflow. When I look at the painting, the water seems to be coming from the shore instead of parallel to it. I hope you don't mind, but I drew a little diagram to show you what I am trying to say... sometimes I am better at communicating through pictures than through words! The waterfall line doesnt have to be totally straight, and variation and rocks make it interesting, but it does basically need to be angled a bit for it to have a truer effect.

By the way, it was a joy to watch you paint my dog, Zorro! Thank you for selecting my picture. I checked out your site, and I love the colors you work with and found your painting style intriguing.

Have a good day.
jyvonne

Artguy29
08-30-2004, 09:07 AM
Thank you so much, jyvonne. I would have never realized that. I guess it's harder than I thought to work from memory. Your diagram has been very helpful, I'm glad you made it. I'll work on the direction of the water and post the update. I had a great time painting Zorro. Thanks again,

Dave

Artguy29
08-30-2004, 10:58 AM
How does it look? I still have to adjust the cabin and maybe add the rocks again(???); they got covered when I went over the water.

Dave

jbitzel
08-30-2004, 01:15 PM
That looks 100% better. It was good before but now there is nothing to take away from the mountains and sky.

jyvonne
08-31-2004, 12:09 AM
Wow, Dave! That turned out great! I love how you showed the strokes of the water before the actual fall... very nice.

Hmm... "rocks???" you wondered. Well, I love rocks in a waterfall scene, but it really looks nice now, too. I guess whatever you want to do. It does look like there are rocks under the water just before the fall where the old rocks were and I think that looks nice... adds depth.

Make sure you show us your final version if you decide to do anymore with it.

jyvonne

DeusExMachina
08-31-2004, 06:38 AM
It's pretty neat to see how this painting developed.
Am loving the final version because the water's now really coming and going in and out of the painting.
I particularly like the 'beach' thingy you have going. :)

Perhaps you want to think of a few details. A floating log, a lone tree next to the house...
And if it were my painting I would make the path to the house less straight.

lensman
08-31-2004, 07:14 AM
You did a great job on fixing the water, but the problem I have is with the 'mountains' if that's what they are. They are waaaaay to close to the foreground and the cabin is on the same plane as they are making the mountains look like large piles of frozen dirt or something. The horizon line needs to be pushed back to correct this.

Glenn

Artguy29
08-31-2004, 08:48 AM
Thanks, everyone. Glenn, Not quite sure how to go about that. Should I push the mountain back or bring the cabin forward? When I finished painting the mountain, I had a feeling that it was way off scale, which I think it is. Or should I just take out the mountain all together? I'll defenitly be working on this one!

Dave

Artguy29
08-31-2004, 09:04 AM
Just another thought: What if I were to cover the mountain and the cabin with the grassy area. That would push the horizon back and I could add a very small, faint mountain in the distance and put a larger, bolder cabin near the forground. How would I place the cabin in the middle of the grass, though? Thanks,

Dave

SilverLady
08-31-2004, 10:30 AM
No, don't do that. That looks fine.

I like the building. We have lots of buildings in Louisiana that look just like that. "smile"

Silverlady

BRIDGES
08-31-2004, 10:46 AM
Main problems with paintings is the light direction and lights and dark, shadows on and in objects....Like one side of mts, cabin etc. Even water darker and lights. it is value of a color. Darker and lighter....work on this always...Bridges

Artguy29
08-31-2004, 11:03 AM
Bridges,

Are you saying I should have one side of the mountain in shadow and one side in the light instead of what I have now? I think that may look better.

Dave

BRIDGES
08-31-2004, 11:24 AM
Yes, shadow one side of cabin or leave what you have and lighten one side. Also mts, too uniformed what you have. Mts have deeper value at bottoms and what we call "saddles" sometimes shadows from Clouds..i think.., and touchs of highlights. when I finish I hightlight all objects on tops and side, with lesser value of usually same color but could be different color. Do you know how many shadows in nature have blues, pale oranges, alizarins etc in them for highlights....Color
Love several greens in grasses, browns, beiges, whites etc..I used to say now grass is not green and sky is not blue,,etc to class.. Many colors..LOOK HARD Bridges

coherent
08-31-2004, 11:40 AM
It was a huge improvement when you fixed the water... it went from looking like random brush strokes to flowing water, great job. I'd like to see the rocks put back in and you could "ground" them with a little swirling water or ripples (I just like rocks lol). One way to "push" the mountains back would be to decrease their contrast and value. Remember that distant objects not only need to be the correct perspective in regard to size, but correct value too. Closer objects are more focused, have brighter colors and more contrast... try "graying down" and decreasing contrast of objects in degrees, the further away, the more you do so and you'll "trick" the eye and achieve more depth. Keep up the good work and thanks for sharing.
-marc

Artguy29
08-31-2004, 11:48 AM
Thanks, Bridges and Marc. I think I can make this much better with your advice.

Dave

Artguy29
08-31-2004, 05:52 PM
I tried working on this painting earlier and I have been getting very frustrated. I've decided to put this on hold until I gain the confidence to go back to it. Thank you, everyone, for all of your comments and suggestions; I really appreciate it.

Dave

BRIDGES
08-31-2004, 06:44 PM
good to put on hold instead of working to death. Hang on wall, look at it as you pass by everyday and things come to you and you see in different prespective Have you ever held in front of mirror? You can often see mistake or something to catch your eye. sometimes when thougt painting finished and hug awhile i go back and say to myself wonder why "that "was there or this needs fixing or adding something.... DO NOT get frustrated...Only a painting and it should be a fun, relaxing thing!!Best to you Bridges