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billrspc
12-12-2003, 05:28 AM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/12-12-2003/7882_Autumn_blizzard_1_wc.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Autumn blizzard
Year Created: 2003
Medium: Oil
Surface: Board
Dimension: 12x16
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
still practicing my knife techniques on this little fall scene from down the road... is it to rough???

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
I have read that the three most important elements in a good painting are 1. composition 2. value and 3. color.. it that order
I am self taught and I feel that my composition skills could really improve. any suggestions in that area or any other suggestions are welcome! Thanks

jerryW
12-12-2003, 06:13 AM
I like the impressionist integrity and impact of this
the fence seems the most clear and may dominate
will that matter?

roberj
12-12-2003, 12:06 PM
Compositionaly, I think it may have been better without the fence. The fence and the reinforcement of the curbing or roadway serve to separate the viewer from the scene. It is certainly not a fatal flaw and I like the painting. My favorite part is the play of reflected light and color on the sides of the building and the background under the trees. Both of these areas are very well done. The higher foliage near the top of the painting looks a little too intense in color value, but it is hard to judge the values from a computer screen and they mau read well in life. The painting looks a lot like Kincade without the obnoxious special effects. Mention of Kincade usually brings a sneer, but I meant it as a compliment. If you take away his "lights", sentimentality, and his sometimes wonky perspective, he does paint with a wonderful flair.

Bob

jackiesimmonds
12-12-2003, 12:18 PM
Composition: the comment about the fence, is on the money. The problem with this kind of feature in a painting, is that it acts as a kind of visual barrier, our eye hits the fence, and virtually comes to a grinding halt, right there. One can sometimes get away with it, if there is a gap in a fence like this, where the eye can travel through and on into the mid distance ... but in this instance, it is difficult.

To improve composition, it is necessary to get beyond thinking purely of the "reality" of objects, and to start thinking about how the shapes work within the rectangle. Not always an easy jump in perception to make, but sometimes, a little thumbnail sketch helps quite a bit. In fact, there are some lovely echoes going on in the top half of the picture. That roof shape is echoed in the shapes of the branches of the trees - very nice. The position of the house is good too. It is the just the foreground shapes, created by the fence, which aren't helpful.

Looking at your pic in a mirror tends to point up flaws, you see it with new eyes, and looking at it upside down helps too! There are articles here on WC about some of the basics of good composition, which you might find helpful. Let me know if you want a link.

Values: going really well.

Colour : that too - you have no real problems there.

In terms of technique, it is also fine.

Not sure about the title. I see no blizzard at all!! What I see is mellow autumn sunlight, striking the side of the house, and lovely glowing autumn foliage. Where is a blizzard? It is important how you title your work. Call this one Fall Sunlight instead, or something similar, that would be much better.
J

billrspc
12-12-2003, 05:58 PM
Thank you all for your intrest ! I agree about the fence, I do tend to get to hung up on what is actually there !! If I had made more sketches I would have seen that . I did this quick pencil sketch and painted it in my photoshop. Letting the fence lead into the picture looks much better I think:) I will try to redo this weekend come back and check!!
I have read everything I can locate on wet canvas about composition and it has been very helpful.. If anyone knows of any other literature that might be helpful please let me know !
Thanks again for all your comments !! it helps sooo much !! Bill :cool:

billrspc
12-12-2003, 06:01 PM
OH! Jackie...... the blizzard refers to all the leaves falling which dosen't show that well on the puter .. its more evident in live viewing :D Thanks Again :)

jackiesimmonds
12-13-2003, 04:25 AM
MUCH better, Bill, well done!

pero lane
12-13-2003, 11:43 AM
Fence leading in makes it so much better...colors are glorious!:)

billrspc
12-14-2003, 05:07 PM
Although I still intend on redoing this painting with the new composition, I was curious to see what I could do with this as is , so I lowered the values on the fence and opened the gate. Then added a little perspective to the road and scattered somemore leaves and branches around. I think It made this painting much more likeable..
Thanks Again to all who have taken their time to comment! Its a BIGGGG help :) BIll :cool:

giniaad
12-15-2003, 06:21 PM
(life seems a blizzard for the moment!)

saw this in my brief lurking the other day...
can't stay away for too long!!
(now let's see how much longer I can stay on line)

had to bring it back up!!

I love your improvements and think others should see it as well

great going!!
love it!!

billrspc
12-16-2003, 02:30 AM
Thanks Giniaad for your comments !! I was begining to think no one was gonna see the improvementts !hahahhahah I always post to soon , I guess that is part of the learning experience too :)
I like the painting much more now. although it still has some problems I think it has been saved from the trash bin !!hahahha
I am still gonna redo with the new composition when I can But the Christmas Blizzard (whirlwind is more like it ) is catchin up to me also .... MERRY CHRISTMAS to all !!! :)