PDA

View Full Version : Jam at 55


Portrait of Sound
11-02-2016, 11:26 AM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/11-02-2016/1042852_Jam_at_55.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Jam at 55
Year Created:
Medium: Acrylic
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 16x20
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I paint musicians making music, occasionally other active portraits (sports, pets) I like to experiment with lively random marks and words/numbers/symbols. I want a realistic-meets-abstract expressionist look. I feel lost in 2 major areas - color and composition. Any thoughts - good or bad or constructive (but not mean) are appreciated.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
I would like to keep the "energy" and frenetic feel of this painting, but I feel like I have deadened it with use of too much Titanium White and Paynes Gray. Can you suggest better ways for me to get depth and liveliness and contrast without overuse of these two colors?

Also, what do you think of the composition? Thoughts on the focal point and flow? Use of color?

Tom Brown
11-02-2016, 12:23 PM
Yeah, throw the white and the panes away. Or at least hide em, ya dont need em. Nice work.

La_
11-02-2016, 01:39 PM
lol
how else are you going to get the darkness - how else are you going to get light
pretty difficult [impossible?] to get contrast without dark/light
i think paynes is a perfect dark for band themed work, being blue/grey and quite transparent. white, well, it can kill color intensity somewhat, but it's better than using only yellows.
composition - odd to have a drummer set up front and centre and the size diff between him and the guitar player is maybe a bit extreme.
details - opening the drummers mouth a bit, let him sing, would provide a bit more action, if you want it.
all in all you've got a dynamic event going on here.

la

mje
11-02-2016, 05:10 PM
The cymbal on the drummer's right seems too high and appears to be floating in space. The drummer's left stick extends beyond anything he might be striking. You could get more energy with a more dynamic pose for the drummer, facial expression, and have him striking up toward a cymbal. I had an example photo link, but i don't have enough posts yet. Lok for it below.

mje
11-02-2016, 05:11 PM
Dummy

mje
11-02-2016, 05:11 PM
Drummer example http://didierbeck.com/pics/diverse/elvinjones02.jpg

Janalice
11-03-2016, 02:38 PM
I like it. Because it is abstracted, the differences in proportions don't bother me.

The drummer does seem a little too centered. Maybe just tilting or turning his head a little and opening his mouth as suggested would help.

You can get great darks by mixing alizarin and a transparent green such as viridian or halo green.

To darken a color, why not add some ivory black?

And for a black area, why not use black? (I use Mars.)

Nice work.