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Wetbrush3018
09-26-2016, 12:33 AM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/09-25-2016/1984056_20160925_190502.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Untitled
Year Created:
Medium: Oil
Surface: Board
Dimension: 18x24
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
Commissioned from a family picture while in Greece for a client.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
Any suggestions or feedback is welcome!

Wetbrush3018
09-26-2016, 12:37 AM
Sorry for the poor picture quality.

twinwaffle
09-26-2016, 03:51 AM
Perhaps it is just the image quality of the photograph, but it seems to me that the stuff in the background has sharper edges than the people in the foreground? And that doesn't feel right to me.

~JMW~
09-26-2016, 05:30 AM
The color of the water seems to overpower the figures...or wash them out.
I think more contrast between the water & figures would ook better..

Tom Brown
09-26-2016, 08:14 AM
Perfect as is.

kin3
09-26-2016, 11:37 AM
If I commissioned it I would be happy. Well done.

Wetbrush3018
09-26-2016, 02:10 PM
Here's the original image. I had to lighten up the painting quite a bit even though the image I took is out of focus.

Thanks for the feed back. I battled with the water and tried not to paint the figures so dark.


http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/26-Sep-2016/1984056-20160714_204111.jpg

Pinguino
09-26-2016, 11:37 PM
Something needs to be done, to make the mid-background recede relative to the foreground figures. Either that, or make tha background more prominent; but I don't think that works here.

The brightness of the water is OK, since it relates to the lighting. But I might cheat a bit, and make the more distant water darker, as if it is reflecting the distant hills.

The shaded white of the foreground clothing is too close in value to the shaded white of the background buildings. If those buildings were not white, who would know? Maybe cheat.

MindGem
10-04-2016, 05:33 AM
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/04-Oct-2016/1985471-Untitled-1.jpg

Here's what I think.

Put stronger backlight on the figures for drama.
blur out the background more to bring focus to the figures, also blue it out a bit to push distance.
add something on the beach..it's too much sand without anything going on.

and perhaps add a splash or something as if the boy threw a rock.

Yvonne Keogh
10-04-2016, 07:53 PM
It's jaw dropping - so beautiful. I do agree with mindgem about blurring the background which is so distracting and lighting up the humans.

Tom Brown
10-04-2016, 09:56 PM
No! You nailed this. It's perfect as is.

twinwaffle
10-05-2016, 02:41 AM
Perhaps it is just......yeah, blah blah blah, but what I failed to mention, I realize, is that the painting is amazing! okay now I did. :)

truebeliever
10-06-2016, 01:57 AM
It looks good to me. Mindgem had some strange suggestions that I don't agree with. A painting is not an illustration, you don't need to spell out drama on every square inch. Part of the beauty of looking at paintings is in allowing the mundane or the commonplace to become beautiful. I think you've done that. Furthermore, I think that there is a tiny bit of awkwardness in the picture which is also to your credit -- if you iron out the wrinkles, there's no reason for it not to be a photograph, is there? Thumbs up from me.

angiestaff
10-06-2016, 11:30 PM
I love it just the way it is. It's a beautiful painting.

Wetbrush3018
10-12-2016, 09:05 PM
Working form the picture it was a challenge to get the detail of the faces as it was very dark. It wasn't the picture I wold have picked to have worked from but that is what my customer wanted. I really like the idea if blurring the back ground to help distinguish the fore ground. The customer loved it and that to me was vindication that it turned out great. But.....thank you for all the input and kind words! It's nice to hear different perspectives and ideas too.

Big Al 444
10-27-2016, 01:12 AM
I think you did a phenomenal job is creating that painting from that photo. That's art.

I would maybe darken the water from the mother over to the left. This will enhance the sunset on the right and create more of a highlight on the water and also add some separation with the light clothing. I tried to adjust it a little to explain what I see...

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/27-Oct-2016/34986-Edits.jpeg

picassolite
10-27-2016, 11:20 PM
other comments:
"background has sharper edges
The color of the water seems to overpower the figures...or wash them out.
The shaded white of the foreground clothing is too close in value to the shaded white of the background buildings
Put stronger backlight on the figures for drama.
You nailed this. It's perfect as is.
A painting is not an illustration, you don't need to spell out drama on every square inch."

And your comment - "The customer loved it and that to me was vindication that it turned out great."

Taking these comments into account - 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder.'

Happy that your customer loved your painting. That is always a good sign.

Should you take it a step further - it means this kind of composition could be re-used.

Like so:

1- change the lighting,
2- keep the figures in the same x-y co-ordinates - just substitute other figures.
3- Add a dog running along the beach waterline.

What I'm getting at here is - your client really loved your composition and your execution.

Re-use the composition for additional paintings and you are on your way to many accolades...

ie - the grand-parents on a beach holiday with grand-kids.
the just-married couple on a honeymoon beach stroll.
the big sister - chasing her younger siblings along the beach.
the nanny pushing the pram along the beach - cocker spaniel in tow.

I only mention this - because sometimes we artists go slack with our ideas ...and yet the many permutations of a previously successful work could spark - new work.

Also - I wanted to congratulate on your excellent use of the rule of thirds and mention that the use of Notan could add more focus to your image...
like what I did with the water and moving the mother and child slightly to the right.

Best of luck
Picassolite (https://focuspointshape.com/jurors-corner/graham-berry-reconstruction/) :angel: http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/27-Oct-2016/1983103-ptg_1.jpg

melbeewin
10-30-2016, 08:11 PM
I love the quality of detail and realism of this piece. There is definitely a sense of place. It's quite laudable that you were able to create this from such a dark photo. I do like the addition of backlighting around the figures to separate them from the ground; I would also do something to connect the boy to the figures behind him. He seems so separate. It would be better to have something that creates a circular pattern for the eye to follow from the taller woman to the lower boy...maybe with the wave pattern? or the backlighting?