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Joi
10-21-2003, 01:16 AM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/10-21-2003/15254_transitionsm.jpg

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/10-21-2003/15254_transition2.jpg

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/10-21-2003/15254_transitiondet.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Transition (Fall Trafficlight)
Year Created: 2003
Medium: Oil
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 6
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I think I am finished with this, but I won't hesitate to push more paint around if needed.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
What do you think?

Also- What do you think of the title, "Transition"? I would like the viewer (though it isn't nessisary) to see the relationship between the yellow light and the fall leaves--both are a brief transition. Is there a better title that would convey this message?

TScottDove
10-21-2003, 01:22 AM
terrific title. the neighborhood also looks like it might be a college campus to me - more transition.

like this a lot. color, composition, everything

Rabbit Twilight
10-21-2003, 10:30 AM
Looks good, and the title is perfect.

Andrew
10-21-2003, 10:38 AM
Well executed painting.

My only criticism is compositional. I find the outer stoplight and car (which is where my eye leads) are right on the center line of the canvas. IMO, the picture would be stronger if that line were a little further left or right of center.

Andrew

giniaad
10-21-2003, 11:21 AM
the car...looks lined going straight...the street angled
if you add the side of the car
it would also detract it from the "center"
(as per Andrew's thoughts on comp)
and line it up with the painting perspective
(not sure how you could move the car and not mess
with the composition in other ways)

I think this has come together very nicely!
love the hint of brown/red around the yellow lights
pulling them even more in line with the foliage

I think the title works
maybe you could add an s...transitions
to emphasis there are more than one
(fall/lights...etc)

Joi
10-21-2003, 03:13 PM
Thank you for commenting everyone!


TScottDove> Good observation, it is indeed a college campus :) I enjoy painting scenes from my daily life, and walking to campus is one of them! I also like the idea of tieing in college as a transition too.

Rabbit Twilight> Thanks :D

Andrew> Doh! I totally missed that composition problem, thanks for pointing it out.

giniaad> Thanks for your solution ideas. I will try to add in the side of the car to see if that helps....anything more I think would be more work than I want to devote I think (It is such a small painting, 6"x12"). And I think I will also add an "s" to the end of the title, I agree it works better ;)

Thanks again!