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cordobesa
07-27-2015, 06:59 PM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/07-27-2015/1969512_DSC_0617~2.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: not yet
Year Created:
Medium: Oil
Surface: Canvas
Dimension: 16x20
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I tried to use a restringed pallette and tried to make shadows the right color

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
Anything

Bevahlee
07-27-2015, 07:30 PM
I just love the restricted palette and the figures dancing and the softness of it all. Not sure what is in the foreground but it takes the eye and almost makes it the focal point. It's just not a very interesting item imho

cordobesa
07-27-2015, 07:47 PM
Thank you for your comment Bevahlee. I didn't know what to do in the foreground. It was in the picture, I thought it would add perspective...but maybe it should be more out of focus? Would you just take it out? Thanks again.

Bevahlee
07-27-2015, 08:31 PM
It needs something there. Let me think about it. Because it needs to mean something because it's prominent

Bevahlee
07-27-2015, 08:41 PM
this is a possibility. They've taken the dog for a walk but heard the music coming from one of the buildings maybe and had to dance while the dog waited. Something tat pulls it all together. Foreground, middle ground, background. Be careful not to get the dog too big.

Bevahlee
07-27-2015, 08:49 PM
maybe like this but with the coloring same as the blues in the dress

gouligann
07-31-2015, 05:53 AM
This is a lovely, romantic scene. I love the soft yellow lighting in the buildings. Good job on the dancers! Just enough detail to bring attention to them, but soft enough so they don't stand out too much in the scene.

Unless it is intended, the (viewer's) left hand light post isn't straight.

Also, I don't understand what the horizontal stripes are in front of the dancers?

I agree with the object on the ledge being distracting. How about replacing it with a wine glass (with white wine to keep with your neutral colours) or a small cream or white(ish) clutch purse?

cresta126
07-31-2015, 12:15 PM
I had to go have a second look after reading the comments,because I had casually skimmed through, and I had thought the object on the ledge was an old fashioned gramophone, you know the type with a speaker ,so would that work? Lovely painting I would buy it!

cordobesa
07-31-2015, 07:06 PM
Hi there, thank you for your comments!
I have been thinking about what to do on that corner. It is actually an iron lamp, it is symbolic, I kind of like it! So I am thinking in making some fire come out from the top...
Bevahlee, your comments always right on the spot and encouraging. Thank you, and sorry for the late response.
gouligann, thank you for your answer and kind comments. The lamp should be straight, I will correct that thank you. The horizontal stripes are part of the design of the floor (I thought it would give better perspective?).
Cresta126, the object is this kind of "votive lamp" made of cast iron, it usually doesn't have a flame, but I am thinking with the flame will look better?...
Will post the finished picture later.

Cheers!

Mike L
08-02-2015, 01:39 PM
The iron lamp draws my eyes away from the rest of the work. Here are two suggestions:

First one just changes the black shape to something a bit smaller and more recognizable so the viewer doesn't dally on it. The second one deletes the entire lower quarter of the work. I like it best without the distraction, but that's me.


http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/02-Aug-2015/1971095-not_yet_1.jpg http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/02-Aug-2015/1971095-not_yet_1_crop.jpg

R/Mike

Dana Design
08-04-2015, 12:41 PM
I agree with Mike L. Crop it and there is a lovely painting. Soft, ethereal, movement and dreamy.

jocko500
12-18-2015, 05:39 PM
it be hard to crop as it is on canvas so put a flame there like you say to do. or a dog or another person watching.

cordobesa
12-18-2015, 06:20 PM
Thank you everyone! This is what I finally did. I hope you like it...

Jules Hilliard
12-19-2015, 07:33 PM
This is a good night painting. Cropping off the bottom brings the dancers forward and makes them the main subject. Or, you might just paint out the lower part.