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View Full Version : Strawberry C&C please?


Mike L
06-06-2015, 03:30 PM
Ten days at the end of May and beginning of June are strawberry season. Picking them is back breaking work, but when you're young and allowed to eat all you want while you pick - well, there are benefits. :thumbsup:

8" X10". Acrylic on canvas board. 4/2015

PaintingJay
06-06-2015, 07:26 PM
Your project was fruitful. OK - couldn't resist on that. I like how it looks a bit wet and freshly picked. Well done.:)

Jay
- www.presentpainting.com

cliff.kachinske
06-06-2015, 09:28 PM
Some of the basic elements are present. Light, shadow, highlight.

I'm viewing this on my phone, so maybe I'm missing something ... but the dark table top makes it hard to see the shadow.

For big objects like the tabletop it helps to have a dark tone, a mid tone and a bright tone. Same thing for the leaves. You could get more contour and differentiation with more tonal variation, light to dark.

chammi kaiser
06-07-2015, 06:56 AM
A few highlights on the seeds would give this more 'umphh'. I like the shape of the strawberry and the leaves are nice but also need a few lights to brighten them up. Lightening the tone of the table and leaving the shadow the colour it is (perhaps softening the edges slightly) will be worthwhile . Just a few tweeks and you have something to be proud of.

noodle1
06-07-2015, 01:23 PM
I agree with Chammi, only thing Could suggest is adding a deep yellow rather then the dark you have for the little seeds. You can darken them in your shaded area. Highlighting around the seeds will give you a lot of depth. Nice job, My favorite fruit.

Hugs
Elaine

Charlie's Mum
06-07-2015, 02:55 PM
I agree with posts above .... it's in need of greater contrast to give better form, thought the shape is good. More variation of tone on the leaves and attention to the seed areas would mske a tremenfous difference. I slso find the very strong blue takes attention away from the delicious fruit!

Dcam
06-07-2015, 04:46 PM
The work on the fruit is good, the leaves seem to have been hurried and need more form.

Derek

Mike L
06-08-2015, 10:16 PM
Thanks for all the constructive comments! I'll take each one and try to do something with it. :thumbsup:

Since it is my painting, I'll make my own rules, though. Because I don't see any way to incorporate all that into a minor fix, I'm claiming the right to a do-over. :lol:

I hope a group hug is sufficient thanks :grouphug:

R/Mike

ColinS
06-09-2015, 01:30 AM
Thanks for all the constructive comments! I'll take each one and try to do something with it. :thumbsup:

Since it is my painting, I'll make my own rules, though. Because I don't see any way to incorporate all that into a minor fix, I'm claiming the right to a do-over. :lol:

I hope a group hug is sufficient thanks :grouphug:

R/Mike

They are well-meaning. :angel: by the time you address all the ideas your strawberry will be an orange! :rolleyes: But it will be an awesome orange.

I like the strawberry. Good shape; great lush red colour.

Mike L
06-09-2015, 09:32 AM
Colin, I apologize if my comments in any way made you think or feel I was being facetious or snotty. I was trying to express my pleasure with the comments received. I know each commenter meant well, and each comment was, in my inexperienced opinion, right on target.

The painting will be redone from scratch because I don't have the requisite experience to fix what is there. That was said with what I hoped was humor.

R/Mike

LavenderFrost
06-09-2015, 11:55 AM
I don't think you need to do over, just some refining of the leaves. First impression is that the painting is dark but that could be the photo? You have to judge that in person. I know I have trouble with paintings being too dark. Have to remind myself to set it in dim light before deciding if it's done. The strawberry looks pretty good though, that part doesn't need to be touched much, unless you want to brighten some of it.

But you're right, it's your painting and you can do what you want with it. The good thing about advice is that you only have to consider it, and then do what you want with it.

Mike L
06-10-2015, 04:46 PM
After more than an hour reviewing comments and staring at the original, I decided to try to fix it. This morning I spent another hour staring at it and re-reading comments, and finally came up with a plan.

Before & After

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/10-Jun-2015/1971095-strawberry_01_px800.jpg http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/10-Jun-2015/1971095-150609_STRAWBERRY_150423_2_px800.jpg

I should have remade the original photo outside as I did the after photo. I think my camera optics need some attention because the phtos are all over the place for this painting. Still some problems, but a lot of improvement - open for another round of C&C.:thumbsup:

R/Mike

Charlie's Mum
06-10-2015, 05:29 PM
Lol Mike - I love people who TRY!
I can see how you've taken the comments into account - and we're probably , en masse, too much for you;)

The leaves and strawberry are much, much better - better form and solidity, and good lighting. Well done.

I'd suggest a plain b/g though the colour (blue) is a good tone.
... and those shadows from the berry - keep the strokes horizontal to make it lie flat and allow the tone of the shadow next to the berry to be a similar tone - really quite dark - lightening only slightly as it moves away.

But well done!:)

Mike L
06-15-2015, 03:35 PM
If anyone is still looking at this thread, here's my final product. At least for awhile. I still like it, but there's still some very amateurish problems despite working with some very helpful critiques. Maybe I'll dust it off and take another look in 15 years or so. Colors are close to what's on the board.
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/15-Jun-2015/1971095-150615_STRAWBERRY_1_700PX.jpg

C&C welcome.

LavenderFrost
06-16-2015, 11:50 AM
The strawberry looks delicious and that's main thing. lol

Mike L
06-17-2015, 08:13 AM
Thanks, LavenderFrost. I'm still unhappy with the shadow, though. Maybe too much local color and not enough gray. Shape could be better, too. There are other issues, but it's good enough to turn into an over sized refrigerator magnet. :lol:

R/Mike

LavenderFrost
06-17-2015, 12:16 PM
The shadow actually looks like a reflection now. Add a little reflection of the leafy part and say it's on a reflective surface.

hunterpaul
06-18-2015, 04:02 AM
I agree.. the strawberry now looks like it is set on a reflective surface, this would also affect the shadows on the underside of the strawberry, and of course select some of the leaf.. Take a look at your blue background also, as if it is reflecting, be careful to reflect it true in the Surface.. Of course art is always easier to rectify if we see what you are using as reference, If its from your imagination, then it simply comes down to wether you like it or notů as inside your head you may have created a world where, reflective surfaces, only reflect what is directly on them and only red colour.. So, don't get bogged down too much on this one painting by what is being said.. get a strawberry place it on a surface take a pic, and post, then We can talk shadows etc etc.. Or just be happy and move forward.. x
I personally like where it has gone

Mike L
06-18-2015, 08:46 AM
...Of course art is always easier to rectify if we see what you are using as reference...
The reference photo was found through a Google search and then printed (fair use/educational). I chose it because it was stark as well as sharp - a professionally shopped image of one berry with a drop shadow around the entire circumference. No distractions that way. Didn't save the image and can't find it, anymore.

The shadow actually looks like a reflection now.
I think you're right, LavenderFrost.

If this piece were to sell (yeah, right - :lol: ) the purchaser probably wouldn't notice most of the bad or questionable parts. They'd want the strawberry to adorn a kitchen wall or turn it into a 'fridge magnet and would think nothing of the strange shadow or misshapen leaves. They'd most likely think my mistakes were on purpose.

Anyway, thanks to all of you who made comments, both critical and non-. Hopefully I've learned something from this series and will put the lessons to work in other pieces. I'm going to stop here and enjoy what I've done and not fash m'sel' so much over it.

R/Mike

Charlie's Mum
06-19-2015, 11:17 AM
As an image, this latest(last) version is the most pleasing I think!

Put it on your own kitchen wall - it will make a nice bright note!:)

Should anyone wish to buy it, any 'errors' really wouldn't matter - buyer sees, likes and pays!:)

Good luck;)