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joelaidler101
03-04-2015, 04:21 PM
Hi this is painted with acylics on paper. Feedback is always appreciated.

birdhs
03-04-2015, 06:38 PM
this seems like such a good idea...but it seems to fall a bit short...IMHO.

not sure why it seems incomplete or what

Diagonals usually indicate action and movement, yet this has none.
Mark-making can create a sense of flight, flow, swirl or smoothness, lanquidity (that probably is not a real word)

because all the marks are similar I feel no height or depth, no COI appears,
it is not the choice of colors (Actually I really love this color combo), it is the lack of having a feeling < > emotionlessness.

Put this up, walk away from it, turn around

what is your first impression?
did it 'say' to you what you want it to say to us?

just think aboot it,
nothing is meant as an insult or put down,

greggo

Eraethil
03-05-2015, 02:14 AM
I really enjoy the analogous palette you've chosen. The colours work very well together. There is a hopefulness in the colours for me. (just my personal association to the colours)

The COI for me is very close to the bottom left corner: the longest close to straight line on your canvas. I'd have loved to see a broader range of values shifting the COI and the composition of shapes a bit.

If you want to take it further, look at it as a grey scale photo first to see where you could add a darker dark or a lighter light, perhaps.

RandyC
03-05-2015, 11:14 AM
I like what you have done here. For me the bottom right color falls a little flat. If it were warmer and a little more intense I think it would give the whole piece a more 3-D feel with the 3 different color layers seeming more on top of each other (if that makes any sense)

Katie Black
03-05-2015, 11:51 AM
I like the delicate colours you have chosen. It looks to me like you have started off quite strong in the top left hand quadrant, but then ran out of steam a bit as you approached the bottom right hand quadrant.:)

joelaidler101
03-06-2015, 02:36 PM
Thanks for the feedback, i was not really thinking when i painted this, it took only a couple of hours and in hindsight i should have spent longer on it, i like to paint quickly sometimes, and when i come back to a painting i dont like to add sometimes, as i am afraid that it will spoil the painting, then the damage can't be undone, maybe this is why it appears a bit dull to some people.

joelaidler101
03-06-2015, 03:11 PM
In reply to Greggo (thanks for looking at it and reponding) and Rick, without sounding contrite, i think it it about hope, the use of colours i thought portrayed hope and the idea to climb and work hard to make life better, without knowing what your climbing for, just the action of moving upwards and onwards.

Bevahlee
03-06-2015, 03:21 PM
It has a juiciness to it and fluidity...almost like ocean waves moving in, but it's lacking ...either a vertical staining (which I would be inclined to do if it were mine...a really wet thinned down mix of sepia transp. or Burnt umber with black and letting it run over the "waves" creating a sense of reflections perhaps..but just letting the paint flow, stain and hit ridges

joelaidler101
03-06-2015, 03:49 PM
I'm not sure i'm good enough to do that though lol!!

Bevahlee
03-06-2015, 03:54 PM
I am...thin the paint down like water. take a thick brush ...one inch mop or so, load it with paint...put your painting up flat against something so that the paint will run down perfectly vertical...push the brush against the top of the painting, or on a separate card (like credit card) just above the painting and push...letting the paint run down and hit where it wants to

joelaidler101
03-06-2015, 05:47 PM
Thanks Bevahlee i will try that x cheers for the advice, maybe it does lack some definition, or something to bring it out

joelaidler101
03-08-2015, 02:52 PM
I think i'm going to try some burnt umber and paint downward strokes through part of the steps to give it some depth, hope i dont mess it up though, taking on board advice it does need more