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Ms.Sakr
03-13-2014, 06:22 AM
Hello. This is my first abstract painting and I need some advice, comments and critique on what or how if anything could be improved on it. It's a gift for a family member, so I'm hoping it will look its best of course ;) .

It's acrylic on 16◊20" canvas.

Appreciate your help.

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/13-Mar-2014/1113642-2014-03-13_13.14.11.jpg

Sara

birdhs
03-13-2014, 09:56 AM
Question: Did you photo this at a diagonal or it that part of the painting?
Personally I like it at the angle, adds the Modern feeling.

This has a feeling of action, movement, wind to it. Pleasing to the eye.

tanxfersharinwidus

greggo

Ms.Sakr
03-13-2014, 12:55 PM
Birdhs, thank you for your comment. The diagonal edge is part of the painting. I masked the edges and painted with Payne's Gray.

SeaCorc
03-13-2014, 04:24 PM
The masking is bleeding onto the painting. If you want a clean line, seal the tape with a clear varnish or gel before painting.

Beyond that, I donít think the black border works. A lot of people, even non-OCD ones, are annoyed by paintings that are askew, and youíve embedded that into your painting. If you kept the masking in place and chose something other than black, even a variation of the current background, I think it would be more interesting.

Thereís a dark smudge on the light blue in the upper left part of the painting that looks like a mistake that wasnít addressed.

The elements of the painting donít seem to work together. The background is sky, which has no bearing. The foreground is the fire, which seems to be sitting on the ground. It looks clunky. If youíre going for fire in the sky, donít situate the fire on land.

Try reshaping the fire. Fires tend to be more pear shaped than pyramid shaped. Also, put more effort into the flickering particles that are escaping from the fire, they shouldnít look like dashes.

stampedes
03-13-2014, 06:01 PM
i do think the tilted black border is interesting, but it's also VERY bold which makes it difficult for the action in the middle to compete. I think that either the payne's grey or the crisp edge should be modified to be less strong, or the stuff inside should be made more intense somehow. Personally I would take on the latter challenge- bring the "fire" up to the level of that border. It might not need too much!