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obanya
04-01-2013, 01:09 PM
Hi all,
another in need of critique. I am happy that my style is coming through with each one and I am growing in confidence with the help of the forums. Thank you!
Anna

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/01-Apr-2013/1185659-morning-mist.jpg

gouligann
04-01-2013, 01:22 PM
Hi Anna, this is great! A lovely composition and nice bright colours. I love the banged up green boat in the foreground.

One crit: I think with the little touch of red on the two far boats and the red on the rocks tied in nicely with the red on the green boat, this would look much better without the red buoys altogether. I find they steal the show and look like two big reddish orange apples bobbing in the water.
Ann

rossmarie
04-01-2013, 01:45 PM
Very attractive painting, Obanya. I like it very much. The old boat looks
great; its prow seems to have a bit of a "twist" but then it was probably like that - warped with age. Inclined to agree with Ann about the red buoys - although I don't mind the smaller one. This is not a criticism - but to my taste I would have kept the sky lighter and not quite so heavy towards the top. The brilliant white yachts are a very effective counter balance to the old boat in the foreground.

Mike :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

Barkley
04-01-2013, 07:09 PM
I love this painting - really very nice!

Round
04-01-2013, 07:41 PM
Hi Anna
I really like your use of colour in this work and particularly like how you've painted the water and the foreground rocks.

The splashes of orange red provide great contrast. I rather like the buoys although the larger one I think requires more modelling.

Perhaps the sky is a bit 'heavy' with the use of the darker blue. Love the boats!

Well done!
Round

Andrewcody
04-01-2013, 09:09 PM
Hi Gouligan.
If this is a Baltic port the boat in the foreground should be clinker built, not carvel. Small point. There is a problem with the twist in the keel and bow post, if this is correct the planks would have sprung.
I like the colour of the buoys in the water. I would use that colour on the boat in the foreground and possibly remove the buoys as suggested by others.
Regards
Andrew

obanya
04-03-2013, 12:39 PM
Hi folks,
Thanks for the helpful comments. I have kept the bhoys in but agre they were not working as they were. I have darkened them right down an given more form so happy now with outcome. Thanks again!

Spyderbabe
04-04-2013, 03:07 PM
The question is "What is the center of interest"? Right now you have two and a composition that is divided in half down the middle. The red bouys were a device to try to link the two halves and it was almost working. Lowering the value of the white boats would also help.

D.W. Flint
04-05-2013, 12:45 AM
I really like the "painterlyness" of this. I do find the big boat a little distracting and overpowering. Just another opinion though...:)

laudesan
04-05-2013, 09:16 AM
I really do like this, I find the subject matter and the palette exciting.

Could you post a photo of your revisions please?

Cheers JJ

birdhs
04-05-2013, 09:55 AM
strong sense of style and palette
the dark blue in the sky is not balanced by a dark blue reflection on the water, hence the eye is drawn the dark spot.
A darkness below the boats will also draw the eye to the perfect white shapes of them.
or lighten the sky a little...

I like the slight curve of the bow. Because I am not a 'boat' person I thought it was just the natural curve of the wood. I would leave it alone, after all, it is the way you saw it.

thanx for sharing this with us.

hward
04-06-2013, 04:04 AM
There are not enough shadows. I think if you have such bright colors you should have a definite light source (ie, the sun) and, correspondingly, more shadows.

BettiePage
04-08-2013, 02:45 PM
This is beautiful... i love the colors, subject and overall style!

obanya
04-09-2013, 05:04 AM
Hi all,
your comments are much appreciated! I think the points about composition and contrast are particularly helpful. My difficulty is going back to make changes takes away a spontaneity which I feel strangles the freshness of the piece. I like to work intuitively but I know it still needs to make sense to the eyes and I have a way to go. I have made some changes and the photo is not quite so harsh in contrast. It's not perfect but I'm going to leave it now. Each critique also informs the next painting...so thanks again!!
Anna
PS I've titled it 'old and new' so the subject is not about the mist but the boats

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/09-Apr-2013/1185659-old-and-new-revised.jpg

Spyderbabe
04-09-2013, 03:21 PM
Nice! Each painting is a stepping stone to the next one. Thanks for sharing.... post your next one too!