View Full Version : negativity

05-04-2000, 12:21 AM
I am writing this in the hopes that some people might realize that there are better ways to comunicate thier feelings than to use negative words. The negative word can kill the real discussion. i'm of course, refering to some of the more recent responses to topics posted. Instead of saying "this is a bunch of garbage" you may want to say " i disagree with your thought because..." If you explain WHY you feel a certain way about a certain topic you'll be acknowledged in a respectfull manner. I promise. If you invalidate someones right to post a topic you are inviting hostility. You don't have to reply at all if you are offended by a topic but you do have to respect thier right to post it. I realize that i'm probably way out line by even saying this as i'm only a 4 month member but i just think it would be a shame to have to close threads simply because people haven't learned how to debate. We somewhat unanimously appointed Larry to be our moderator & i applaud him for taking on this task, as i'm sure that he is as busy with his life as the rest of us & ask you to please not make him regret it. if we can all agree to respect each others views (not like them nesecarily, but respect them) we won't need to be baby-sat. There, i'm done with my late night tirade! Happy creating to all & lets have some fun here....Cheryl

05-04-2000, 12:43 AM
This is a very thoughtful post.
Thank you for bringing it and
how right you are.

05-04-2000, 02:44 AM
I agree with you 100%. Well said.

s mckee
05-04-2000, 05:15 AM
It's strange how angry exchanges sometimes start over the cheesiest little issues. I think a lot of the time, this happens because someone is actually out to pick a fight and not because they are really passionate about the issue.

The internet at this point in time is a lot like the wild west: lawless and full of pistol-packing bullies. It's common place for a poster to barge into a crowded discussion group and start firing off rounds.

WetCanvas has been largely free from this, fortunately, but it's bound to happen from time to time. I think it's important, though, for those of us who really value this site, to try to restore civility - as Cheryl has - whenever it starts to be compromised.

- Stevie

05-04-2000, 11:45 AM
Paintfool thank`s for posting this it bring`s up a very good point.Sometimes I wonder if what I post might be taken the wrong way, because the typed word when read by someone who does`nt know me might be taken the wrong way.So let me say for the record it has never been and never will be my intention to hurt anyone in this forum.


05-04-2000, 05:35 PM
Mike, I couldn't agree more! And Kaz I know where you are coming from. Maybe the posts need to be read more carfully as well as written more carfully. I know I have misread posts and have also been misread by others. The people here are the best in the world and I hope to see Wetcanvas remain the wonderful place it is. Rick

[This message has been edited by Rick (edited May 04, 2000).]

05-04-2000, 05:41 PM
Rick...thanks for your comments..
As you can see I deleted my post..but I DO agree with the posts that I've seen above...

05-04-2000, 05:59 PM
I am not comfortable with people deleting posts because they spark controversy or step on toes.

I say you said it. You are free to apologize and/or change your mind. You are even free to stand by it. Just do not harp on it.

Seems fair enough.

05-04-2000, 06:43 PM
Just to clarify, the only people who can delete posts are:

1) The author of the original (of course)
2) The moderators of the forum, who are typically "elected" by the participants.


05-05-2000, 01:56 AM

05-05-2000, 02:47 AM
Oh, I got that part.

I just do not feel comfortable with people feeling as though they must "unring the bell" for any reason.

Standing firm is good. Apologizing is good. Deleting, well that just does not seem honorable.

05-05-2000, 04:49 AM
Hear, Hear! Good points all. Lets keep it in mind when we are in a hurry and passing through.

God Blesses!

05-05-2000, 07:44 AM
The moderators and I all follow the same model. The only time a thread is removed from the system is when it:

A) is off-topic for the forum
B) is offensive (based on race, gender, religion, etc.)

Otherwise, threads may be closed (but not removed) when they outlive their usefulness.

No one is deliberately removing threads willy-nilly - so there is a sense of honor here, I assure you. ;-)


05-05-2000, 08:39 AM
i've always been of the opinion that.......everyone's opinion carries equal weight here. so if a responder has a conflicting opinion with another on a point of SUBJECTIVITY, just state the opinion without pointing to another poster. if the issue is on a point of OBJECTIVITY, right or wrong,,,,a little sparring adds spice....milt

05-05-2000, 09:57 AM
Originally posted by bruin70:
if a responder has a conflicting opinion with another on a point of SUBJECTIVITY, just state the opinion without pointing to another poster. if the issue is on a point of OBJECTIVITY, right or wrong,,,,a little sparring adds spice....milt

I agree.

Look at formal political debates as an example. A few shots are toleratd here and there when they don't disrupt the event and if they contribute to the discussion. If it gets out of hand the moderator stops it.

Cindy Agathocleous

"What if imagination and art are not, as many of us might think, the frosting on life, but the fountainhead of human experience?" - Rollo May from The Courage to Create

[This message has been edited by cagathoc (edited May 05, 2000).]

05-05-2000, 02:39 PM
uhoh...Ok..(lol) I'll have to be very sure I want to respond in the future. (Not comfortable with my "hit and run"!! posts either.. It was a very harmless post too!
Let me see, I mentioned that there will always be visitors that drop in to disrupt..and attack, and stir things up a bit, and then leave. I mentioned that these people will also do this in guest books...and I feel their negatives (often VERY intentionally hurtful) are done with the sole intent of attack.
I also mentioned that I had seen this recently in the Cafe..very inappropriate use of language.
Finally, I said that for me..I'm quite happy to see these people leave Wetcanvas..and that I (just joking here) don't mind seeing the door "whack them on their butts"!!! on the way out.
(I deleted my post..because over the years, I've found that support and encourgement almost ALWAYS makes me feel better than even the slightest (in fun) negative comment)
Hope this clears up the "why" I deleted my original post...I'm GUILTY..and will be careful not to post and panic next time. Michael
Your point architect, is well taken..(I don't feel all that comfortable posting and then having second thoughts about the post myself). Will have to make DARN sure I've been concise..and have NO reservations!! (LOL).

[This message has been edited by MichaelRH (edited May 05, 2000).]

[This message has been edited by MichaelRH (edited May 05, 2000).]

05-10-2000, 08:24 AM
One thing I always advocate is " Do not open mouth until brain is engaged" and the most important 6 inches in your life are between your ears.

05-17-2000, 05:02 PM
I have 6 inches of Life between my ears.
Wow, I feel much better now knowing something
occupies that space.

05-17-2000, 06:19 PM
Can we please hear about the benefits of being negative? This being positive stuff is wearing me out.

05-17-2000, 06:35 PM
cagath Originally posted by kelly:
Can we please hear about the benefits of being negative? This being positive stuff is wearing me out.

The benefits of negativity:
1) you don't have to take responsibility for making anything better

2) it's fun and easy

3) you don't have to take others' feelings into consideration

4) you're consistent

& the biggest benfit:

** opposites attract!!!


05-18-2000, 03:42 AM
OMG Cindy!!!, i've always admired your basic outlook but i believe you've finally outdone your self with this latest 'lil bit of logic. couldn't have said it better..Thanks Cheryl