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K8K9SAR
08-06-2012, 07:17 PM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/08-06-2012/1104212_img059.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: School Bus
Year Created:
Medium: Pen/Ink
Surface: Paper
Dimension: 4
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
I drove my Mom out into the country to a friend's and was trying to make myself scarce. In the woods behind the friend's house, I found this delightful old bus which had been abandoned. I did some quick sketches and came home and put this together.

I am open to any and all comments. I am a beginner and want to improve in any ways that I can. I don't typically do automotive themes but this bus haunted me.

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
I am curious if the perspective "reads" as being true and if the lonely emotion I felt is apparent in the piece. Any and all comments welcome.

K8K9SAR
08-06-2012, 07:23 PM
The piece is 4x6 and was done in 2012.

La_
08-06-2012, 10:54 PM
not unusual for busses to be parked in farmers fields around where i live ... and school's out right now so that reinforced the 'just parked' notion ... until i looked closer, saw the broken windshield, realized ... abandonment, retirement, forgotten and alone.

a potential crit is the streaks of dark along the side of the bus - might be overkill in their even-ness
another is the clutter on the ground below the drivers side window - it tries to look like the steps to get into the bus (i see the dead tire? laying there, but what's the other bit behind it? perhaps that should be dark stuffs)

lovely, lonely piece all in all and yes, the perspective is working for me

la

Debzy
08-07-2012, 03:20 AM
I like this very much and think t is really well done. Maybe I would put a few darks / tonal variation in the foreground bushes to help frame the picture, but otherwise I think it's great! I feel sorry for the old bus, it once had happy smiling school kids on it every day and now it is lonely and has nobody. =(( Nice study! Cheers =)) Debs.

Andrewcody
08-07-2012, 03:26 AM
This is very well done K8.
Very nice details, I love the trees
Regards
Andrew

K8K9SAR
08-07-2012, 08:29 AM
La-will take a look at the streaks when I paint them (they were actually streaks of rust) and definitely need to clean up what looked like steps (they are on the other side of the bus).

Debs-completely agree with the need for more darks in the lower foreground. Good suggestion!

Andrew-Trees are one of my favorite things to draw. Thanks!

Andrewcody
08-08-2012, 01:04 AM
You did very well K8 with pen and ink.
The tree trunks are especially good
Have you ever thought of trying Etching?

You are not painting this ..... right????

Regards
Andrew

K8K9SAR
08-09-2012, 04:24 PM
Andrew: I DO plan to paint this (probably watercolour but maybe oils). I am just starting with etching and really am enjoying it, but it is messing with my rods and cones as I have always done black on white and etching makes me stop and think everything through backwards! I can't tell you how many times I have gone to shade something and highlighted it by mistake!

It (etching) does tend to make every stroke meaningful as I have to think about all of them and it doesn't quite flow for me yet the way pen and ink can at times.

Kate