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Debzy
07-17-2012, 04:39 AM
MY IMAGE(S):
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Critiques/upload_spool/07-17-2012/978806_horses_sized_for_WC.jpg


GENERAL INFORMATION:
Title: Down in the Paddock
Year Created:
Medium: Watercolor Pencil
Surface: Watercolor Paper
Dimension: 7 x 7.5
Allow digital alterations?: Yes!

MY COMMENTS:
This is just a very quick small water colour I did for a change, I am thinking of doing a larger work of this. The horse on the left died just after this photo was taken, and she was the mother of the other horse. Her name was solitaire and she was very very old and very loved by her owners. If the larger work tu<br>s out I will very likely sell it to the owners. I just wanted to try a quick work as I had done a few more detailed works lately and needed to break out of the detail mode. =))

MY QUESTIONS FOR THE GROUP:
All C & C welcome, you can be as blunt as you like, I will be doing a larger version of this and hope to sell it so I need all help I can get! Cheers Debs. =))

crazywoman53
07-17-2012, 02:20 PM
The most glaring thing I see is the tree trunk coming out of the horses back. You will need to chop down the tree or move the horse. :) I got a kick out of the blankets for the horses.. at first I thought they were the strangest sheep I ever saw. This isn't fault to you but the difference in horse blankets from your country to mine. In this case it is ignorance on my part but still made me smile. Good luck with this!

Debzy
07-17-2012, 09:53 PM
Hah.... Christine, I thought someone would mention that! I certainly will move the tree, the horse or shorten the trunk somehow in the bigger version. I will post the ref ohoto, yes the horse rugs are definitely blankets aren't they!!! I have tried hard not to make them look like funny sheep but had little luck. Thanks Christine for your input, much appreciated as always. Cheers Debs. =))

TDCT
07-18-2012, 02:13 PM
I totally thought they were sheep as well...lol. But also thought they were very weird sheep haha. I think you will have less trouble with them in a larger work, and they will look more like horses just for being bigger.

tgsloth
07-19-2012, 07:27 AM
Deb, I think you've fallen into the trap (which happens to all of us) of following the reference too literally. This has given you a bad composition:
Not only is the tree coming out of the horse's back but your painting shows a series of pairings. The trees are a pair, the fence posts are a pair (twice), the dark clumps towards the background are a pair and the horses themselves are a pair. I would also say that the horses are too separated, each being somewhat too close to the respective edge. The elements of a good painting are there; they just need to be rearranged. So...
Get the horses closer to each other and have them aware of each other, relating to each other rather than isolated. Drop the white trough as it pulls the eye and serves no particular function. Randomize the other forms. And I think you solve the "weird sheep" problem by giving the horses different colored blankets, maybe yellow ochre.

Debzy
07-19-2012, 08:42 AM
Yes, I completely agree with you Bob! The larger version will be much different. I agree there is no connection between the horses and all the other components of the composition are evenly doubled! The horse growing a tree out of it's back is actually comical looking and I laugh and cringe when I look at it. How could I do that and not notice at the time until it was finished! I can change that easily enough, and can turn the horse on the left around and vary the tree colours and sizes etc in the larger painting. I also thought of altering the horse coats, adding some colour would be easy enough. The troughs are a significant part of the scene I guess because they spend a lot of time near them, but I think rather than them being baths ( that they are) I could change them into rustic troughs with wood surrounds or something similar so that they don't glare out and blind us all!!!! Thank you for your very worthy critique, I will be sure to eliminate the doubling up effect when I do the bigger work!!!! Cheers and keep smiling Debs. =))