PDA

View Full Version : Inner City #2


jumper
06-04-2012, 03:57 PM
acrylic on canvas - 20x16

Inner city #2 is the second in a series. The series is probably going to end with this one.

C&C welcomed...

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/04-Jun-2012/1021092-InnerCity2.jpg

Katie Black
06-04-2012, 11:50 PM
Hi Jumper, I love cityscapes and anything urban, with your painting I feel the bottom half is just a little too busy with all the windows/colours and I'm liking the top half a whole lot more:)

jumper
06-04-2012, 11:56 PM
Thanks Katie! I was beginning to think no one was going to say anything, lol. I have to tell you that I didn't like the bottom part much myself. That's why I said it would probably be the last one. Randy said that I might want to do a series after the first one I posted and I tried to take his advice. I really respect what he has to say (you as well). I'm working on something else right now, so I'm not sure when I will get to this one again. I'm going to take your wonderful advice and see if I can make the bottom part better.

thanks,
jumper

Eraethil
06-05-2012, 12:45 AM
Hi Jumper,

I agree with Katie. I think one of the key things to change is the windows along the bottom edge. That is the only place that you have windows of that scale, and their contrasting colour draws a lot of attention too. Perhaps you could push them back a bit by changing their colour?

This painting just needs to be explored further. I've never thought about doing something like this with only windows and sky as negative space. So it is quite original already. I wonder what would happen if you added depth to the flatness of the buildings but still left no space between them?

jumper
06-05-2012, 01:13 AM
Hi Rick, and thanks for the help. I understand about the windows because I did not like that either. One of the problems with the windows is that I purposely chose the opposite of orange to do the windows, blue. That it seems was a mistake.

I will take your advice and change the colors of the windows for sure. I think I know what you're talking about about giving the buildings up close more depth. So I will try that too.

I really appreciate the help. I needed some with this one because I wanted to throw it out the window :) But with help and suggestions, I might be able to save it.

thanks...

jumper
06-05-2012, 04:05 PM
Hi Katie and Rick. I worked on my painting and try to incorporate both of your thoughts into it. The windows are no longer blue. I toned them down a lot. Do you think I should get rid of the blue doors?

Rick, at first I wasn't sure how I could accomplish what you were thinking about (if I understand you correctly). What I did was try to introduce some shadows on some of the buildings. It changes the painting to something that I "think" makes it more unique. It makes it look like some of the buildings are sticking out more than the others and plays "tricks" on your mind.

Let me know what you think... and thanks a lot to you both!


http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/05-Jun-2012/1021092-InnerCity2.jpg

Katie Black
06-06-2012, 12:01 AM
Hi Jumper, I would probably get rid of the blue doors simply because they arent adding anything to the painting...you dont need them and they are a slight distraction IMHO, I think the overall painting is working better and the only other suggestion would be to think about outlining some of the other buildings in a darker outline, similar to the ones you have done in the front,as the buildings behind are outlined in a light blue and I'm thinking one or two or even all of them may well work better with an outline that supports the front buildings outline more. I may be wrong of course, but hey its fun having a go!

jumper
06-06-2012, 12:46 AM
Hi Katie, I agree with you about the doors. They always sort of bothered me. And thanks about the outline. It's late here right now and I probably won't work on it until the morning. And you're right... it's fun having a go at it! I should have a new version ready for you sometime tomorrow.

Eraethil
06-06-2012, 01:21 AM
Yes it is working better already. Looking more unified and I also like what you did with the buildings in the foreground.

The doors were what I was referring to as "windows along the bottom edge." I was interpreting them as storefront windows rather than doors. I agree with Katie - they are just pulling attention to the bottom edge and I think they would be best if toned down / pushed back / disappeared.

RTT
06-06-2012, 02:37 AM
I like what you did with the updated version. I like how the buildings also can read as 3-D letters. I generally agree with the comments about the blue doors - my first thought was that they were too uniform - perhaps changing the size, the color, maybe have one or two doors open? I wonder too how they might look if more 3-dimensional - like set into an opening.
Oh so many things you could play with.
That's part of the reason I suggested a series - try varying a few elements at a time and see what works best for you (and others). In one series I did a few years ago I set myself a goal of doing 24 paintings - some worked a lot better than others, but you've got to expect that. Of course you don't have to focus on just the series - do other stuff and come back to it every so often if that suits you. :)

jumper
06-06-2012, 12:58 PM
Thanks Rick and Randy. The comments help a lot. I'm just now getting ready to do some of the suggested changes and will post an update later today.

Thanks to all of you for helping "see" better :)

jumper
06-07-2012, 04:13 PM
Well, I wasn't able to complete the work on the painting yesterday. Had too much personal stuff to come up and just couldn't get to it. Here's the new update to the work. I removed the blue doors. Made the background buildings have a little more color with the yellow, and also made the sky have a bit of a glow around the tops of builds in the background. this was an attempt to give the background row of buildings a little more substance. Oh, and the other thing was putting shadows on both of the upper rows of the painting. I tried to get the shadows the correct size for the distance compared with the buildings in the forefront. Almost forgot, I changed the blue outlines on the upper buildings to the same color as the foreground buildings.

Let me know what you think.
thanks,
jumper


http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/07-Jun-2012/1021092-InnerCity2.jpg

Wilsonart
06-07-2012, 05:47 PM
How funny, as I'm seeing "Key To The City".
upper left the keyhole and large, somewhat key shaped
objects in the foreground.
Much better without the doors,,,my opinion.
Nice polish up!

jumper
06-07-2012, 06:15 PM
Hi Babs, Thanks for the comments. I never thought about the "key to the city" part you are talking about. But I can see it now that you pointed out:) I like it better without the doors too. Because blue is the opposite of orange, they stuck out like a sore thumb, lol. I just thought of something while looking at the update. Using blue for the colors of the windows in the background is not right either, so I'm going to visit it again.

Thanks for the "polish up" comment. I do appreciate it!

timE
06-07-2012, 07:52 PM
The blue was my favorite part.

jumper
06-07-2012, 08:15 PM
Hi Tim, sorry if your favorite part was the blue. I just thought that it drew so much attention to the very bottom of the piece, that it just pulled the viewer to the bottom of the piece and off the edge of the work.

Here's another updated version. I tried to push the foreground windows back some by trying to take more of the underlying black out. I also changed the window color of the second row of buildings. They were blue, but I changed them to black (sorry again Tim). I also just did some general polishing to try to make the piece not as sloppy.

here it is... some of the bottom right is a little washed out... sorry.

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/07-Jun-2012/1021092-InnerCity_2.jpg

Katie Black
06-08-2012, 12:54 AM
Hi, Great!..I like what you have done with the sky also!

jumper
06-08-2012, 12:57 AM
Thank you Katie. Unless I get more ideas from other people, I'm going to call this one done :) I thank you and the others for their help. I'm much more happy with the painting than I was.

Mirek Sledz
06-08-2012, 09:22 PM
Interesting landscape, I like second version:)

jumper
06-08-2012, 10:49 PM
Thanks Mirek, as for the second one... I can appreciate them both. In the second one the last two rows of buildings are not as defined and I like that. But I was trying to give it a little more depth in the 3rd.

Thanks for the comment, it's very much appreciated.