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lyn lynch
05-14-2003, 04:17 AM
Weeellll, I don't know that I should be posting this because it's not a good work. I'm unconcerned w/the reference because I think that is relatively OK.

But, it's not working, is it the palette?
Is the image too large for the 9x12 paper?
What's the problems? Critique, please.
Emily, if a problem w/likeness, please state how so?

This is Carole, sister of our own Emily [Mustcreate], taken when she and Emily were visiting in Phoenix last week:
http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/14-May-2003/16729-Carol-Emily.jpg

Olga
05-14-2003, 04:49 AM
Hi Lyn
Now--don't be too hard on yourself. I have no idea about the likeness but your faces are always so interesting looking and this one is no exception. It looks like she is listenting so intently...

I'll venture something which might be crazy... I don't like the square format on this. Her head is kind of squarish as well and together the composition looks too static to me--like you cannot imagine the subject ever moving... and her head looks kind of uncomfortably held. There is a tension between the leaning body and the upright head with no support.

What about a crop like that?

http://www.wetcanvas.com/Community/images/14-May-2003/7629-16729-Carol-Emilycrop.jpg

Oh--I also think she might need a little bit more shade on her neck.

ANd of course all this might be completely off...

Olga

painterbear
05-14-2003, 05:27 AM
Hi Fookie,

Your lady's face is interesting as they always seem to be. The colors are lovely too and the suggestion of a window in the background is good.

I think you hit the nail on the head when you asked "Is the image too large for the 9x12 paper?" I like Olga's suggestion of a crop on the right side, but I think the head could be smaller altogether.

M.A.
05-14-2003, 06:11 AM
I love your work, Auntie. This is beautiful. Olga's crop works for me.:clap:

artmom
05-14-2003, 06:21 AM
Fookie, you know I don't do portraits, yet. However, I think it may be the square format that's bothering you. I think Olga's crop works. I like the palette, and Carole looks like she's sitting w/her eyes closed, soaking up rays.

The one thing that is bothering me is the green bush, which looks a little strong against the light colors of the profile.

Overall, I like the portrait.:)

Uschi
05-14-2003, 08:05 AM
I think the problem is that you say 9 x 12 paper, but what you are showing is square, i.e. 9 x 9 or 12 x 12, meaning you cropped it before you posted it.

As always, your painting is beautiful!!!! Have to see what em says about the likeness. (chuckle, chuckle, chuckle - profile with glasses HA!)
Uschi

bluesrbest
05-14-2003, 08:12 AM
I really like the softness of this one and I don't mind it as is, but you might want to get some more values in there. Right now, it all looks the same value to me. Very nice skintones and blonde hair!
______
Rhonda
:cat:

matingara
05-14-2003, 08:21 AM
I love this. The colors explode! Yet they are soft and complementary. This is a work of great delicacy and sophistication IMHO.

minov
05-14-2003, 08:22 AM
Fookie, well I don't know anything about portraits but I always enjoy yours....love the softness and colors of this. There's something about her left cheekbone/eyeglasses/eye area....maybe add more definition with suggestion of shadow????? Like I said, haven't done many portraits, so see what the portriat people say...

m.

CharM
05-14-2003, 08:56 AM
Fookie...weeelll, this is a GOOD work... you're coming along just fine with this portrait... It is definitely your signature style... and I can see the family likeness...

I have painted only one portrait, so I don't have the experience to offer a good critique... I can say that I don't care for the square format which puts Carole's head nearly in the centre. Her glasses (photogrey's?) appear to be a little dark, but her cheek and facial planes as well as her neck could use a little more shading...

I admire your talent and, like Pam, you always manage to pull out of a crash and burn to win the day! You have been supportive and inspirational to others who thought their paintings were'nt up to par... Time to follow your own advice Auntie!!!

Little Old Lady
05-14-2003, 08:59 AM
Nice colors. I do think the face needs a few darks. Anxious to see what Em says.
JoAnn

Olga
05-14-2003, 09:11 AM
Came to look a second time because I like it :) and thought her glasses sit a bit too tight on her face.... too close to her eyes and face...Wouldn't you need a bit of shadow behind the glasses to fix that?

Olga

mustcreate
05-14-2003, 11:24 AM
Lyn!!!

I instantly recognised this as being Carol!!!

I love the palette

I love the square format

Olga might be right about needing a shadow behind glasses.

Likeness is almost correct......the mouth bothers me. I think the top lip is too big. Her lips look "pursed" and that seems wrong to me. I am wondering about the chin.....too much distance between the lower lip and the bottom of the chin? I'm not sure. One thing I do know is that this pose was a little awkward. She was leaning back in a chair with her head forward reading a book. It might look a little off to the viewer without the book in the scene.

A suggestion.......possibly a bit more definition to the hair.....a few "spikes" here and there or splashes of colour.

overall Lyn, I really like this. but to me it's not quite done.

em

mpopinz
05-14-2003, 03:24 PM
I don't know what either of you look like, but I like the painting of Carol. The looseness, and the colors are pretty impressive.

vestalqueen
05-14-2003, 03:26 PM
I have to agree. Fookie, your portraits always sparkle.

Erin:clap: